Being a good grandma/nanny

Your tea party idea sounds lovely Nannymagic I think the great thing with us Nannies is to spend time with our grandchildren and enjoy being together. Don't try too hard relax and enjoy their company.

Do you have a 'button box'?
I used to love playing with my mum's (a big Quality Street tin) which was passed down to me for my children to enjoy.
Heaps of scope - counting, shape and colour sorting, threading with a big fat needle and a length of wool. Using as 'coins' for pretend shopping play etc.
Ribbons, spools of thread ditto..
You sound a lovely, warm nana!
Do tell us how your day went - and keep in touch!?

Nannymagic you sound a very kind caring nanny. My dgc love me to just read with them or draw pictures. I make playdough and we make things together with it. My dgd loves tea parties too. We have a plastic tea set and she lines up her soft toys to eat tiny sandwiches, which of course she has to eat for them, and put squash in the little teapot which is the part she likes. Simple things are best think then you don't need to get stressed!

I didn’t know any of my grandparents so took my MiL as a role model. She always had time for our children and as a former reception class teacher always managed educational play which was fun - as suggested elsewhere, the button box provided lots of activity, books and felt pens, dominoes (ours have coloured spots so children could colour match before they understood numbers), “helping” in the kitchen - all things I went on to do with my GC. In summer making gardens in a seed tray was very popular as was any kind of digging and filling the child sized wheelbarrow and taking the contents to the compost bin.

We did acquire quite a lot of toys second hand - trike, dolls pram etc and GD1 would get out of the car on arrival enquiring “where are my things?” I so miss those days.

A tea party - what a lovely idea x

You sound like a lovely Nanny to have, I echo what another lady said, get photos of you both, selfies if necessary, as they are part of their world now. My Nana only ever seemed to be disappointed in me and Grandad disliked me because I wasn't like my brothers, and I was adopted so I never felt approved of. I think your grandchildren are So Lucky. Just love every single moment.

I, too, lost many family members when I was young. What I remember, very clearly, is their hugs and little kindnesses. My gran sat outside for hours with me, shelling peas, making daisy chains and reading to me. Her hugs were filled with love. Your grandchildren will remember all those little things (once we're allowed to do them again) so don't feel you need to do anything in particular. The tea party sounds fantastic!

My g/kids ( 7 of them ) have always lived far away, but that means ( obv not at moment) that when I go it’s for a week, or 3 to the ones who lived in Japan for a while. You think they won’t remember you but they do especially with technology. Mine all loved ( still do ) games that I played when I was wee, such as grandmas footsteps, fruit and flower, ball games against wall, snap, ludo, beatle drive. They all loved fuzzy felts and we would make lots of stories round the pictures , special days out for each one. My youngest g/daughter as loved playing hospitals for last 4 years ( she’s nearly 10 now ) and has co-opted her wee brother in as assistant, I’m the patient and have to be sick in bowls and dollies stuck up my jersey as pregnant. Enjoy, don’t overthink and be yourself, even if I tell my lot off they still love me

Nannymagic I know exactly what you mean, I want to be that grandparent too! I've found it's the simple things that my grandchildren seem to love and remember, so a few things we've done: played hunt the thimble (warm, warm, cold), guessing which hand a tiny toy is in, going through my costume jewellery and trying it all on, playing card games like "pairs", crafting, just simple things like glitter glue, gems, googly eyes to stick on card (girls in particular love glitter and gems), baking simple things like fairy cakes. I ask Alexa to play childrens action songs and we dance around to them like crazy, go in the garden and blow bubbles, hunt for bugs, plant seeds, picnic lunches on a blanket in the garden or in the living room if it rains. What will be remembered is the 100% love and attention you give them. Hope this helps.

If your 11 year old grandson is happy to FaceTime with you, then you have been doing something right! Enjoy these times.

I know how you feel. My granddaughter is 4 I love her so much. Unlike you I have hardly seen her for a year now. I have a job not being in constant tears over it. There has been no need for such a distance even with lock down. But unfortunately my daughter makes little to no effort. Anyway ypu are having a tea party how about making a "den"? Ypu could get a duvet cover or a table cloth and drape over some chairs or cover the table and get underneath. My granddaughter loves this sort of thing. Maybe put some fairy lights in it?

I get all the pillows and make a hospital ward with their teddies and dolls and any spare plasters or bandages you have(very cheap in some shops). Then have discussions with the grandchild doctor as to whats wrong? What do they suggest? Then help wrap bandages or they put plasters on. You can then go onto play something else but come back to the ward to check on the patients making a longer game. Obviously don’t leave little ones alone with long bandages.

My mum did a photo album for my daughter's when she went to uni. It was just random family photos no sequence and not particularly neatly put together but my daughter treasures it.

You sound like such a sweet grandma, I have seven grandchildren five are grown up now but they remember the hot chocolate with marshmallows on top and the rice crispy cakes we made and board games we used to play we also used to play shop with things out of my cupboard.
When they got a little older I would send them well done cards for their little achievements like doing well in spelling tests etc.
Relax you are doing a fantastic job

I am sure that your kind gestures, like your lovely tea party, will stay with the little girl, and make happy memories for her. There are some great ideas here; a blanket over chairs to make a secret cave on a rainy day was always such a hit with my children, and in the summer, tents made from sheets and bedspreads pegged to the line, picnics indoors and out - if they have your time and attention, that is often all they need to be happy, and remember happiness.

Dressing up, my granddaughter loved dressing up in anything, but costume jewellery always went down well. Lots of beads and a long skirt. Playing theater by taking turn to do the acting and being the viewer and of course clapping like mad. The more silly the better. Find the thimble, painting and decorating the walls (make sure they are up when she comes next time) and making a painting for mum and dad and her brother who will want to do the same when he comes. so much fun, I have not had mine visit for years and how I miss it. I don't think I would know what to talk to her about now and she is 20 tomorrow.

Oh and do tell her stories, you know the kind that starts 'when I was little.....'. Or make things up. Make up stories together, children love to explore their imagination

Conversations that start with a question too 'what's your favourite colour, animal, game, teacher, friend etc?'
Just being together and paying attention is so valuable.

I remember my Nana with great fondness and she was plain, ordinary, simple hearted and lovely, I still love her to bits and have such happy memories

Your tea party sounds great, can I come?

Ask yourself why you are not good at having fun. Is it because you feel/look silly or people will think you are stupid? I am frequently admonished by DD for allowing DGs and joining in water fights, silly faces and absolutely mad things, because I didn’t let her do them! Let your GD lead the game or activity and relax

Just be your self . If you try to hard that's when it all goes wrong . As long as you are loving and caring that's all that's matter .

We have our granddaughter one day a week...she’s our only grandchild. She is 3 going on 13!! We always go for a walk to the Park and to watch the trains go by ...this week we baked cupcakes and a cake for mommy and daddy. We have picnics on the carpet and play with the Barbies that her mommy played with as a child. She likes to feed the birds with Grandad and chase our dog around the garden. She loves to wash up and paint and colour in princess pictures. I’ve been in child care all of my life and it’s safe to say it’s all about giving them your time...that’s what your grandchildren will remember...attention and being in the moment with no distractions....have fun.

Just reading to them and sharing their favourite books is a great bonding experience, and something they will remember. Ask your grandson what he would like to do, games he would like to play with you. Card games? Baking cakes out of a box is good fun for children, boys and girls.

Mine think it’s hilarious when we dance and I make a fool of myself?.
If it’s a nice day you could fill a bowl with soapy water and wash dolls ect .
Read books together .
Relax and enjoy .
Ps How about letting her try on your clothes and jewellery and do your hair and make up ?
Just don’t answer the door afterwards ???

The tea party sounds wonderful. If there’s time you could make an occasion out of it. You can buy plain paper plates and cups and decorate them with pens and stickers. Lay the table. Make something you can eat. Fairy cakes are a lovely idea. Also little sandwiches or pieces of fruit as well as crisps. Maybe pretend it’s one of the dolls’ birthdays and wrap up a toy as a present with ribbon etc. Put a candle on a little cake and sing! Go through your cupboards and drawers to find some inspiration. Afterwards maybe dancing or party games such as musical chairs and statues. Have a wonderful time.

What lovely people you all are! My grandson is 4 and adore the book 'Tiger who came to tea'.... tea party requested.... we 'wrote' a list of favourites over facetime... (I made the final decision) we prepared the table on the day ... excitement filled the air as I put a candle on a fairy cake so we could make a wish prior to starting! I even read said book throughout. We loved it.... Your thoughtfulness will be remembered! Enjoy.... ?

I know how you feel. I never knew my grandparents and when my daughters had children I just wanted to live long enough for them to remember me. My 1 grandson and my 3 granddaughters are all old enough to do that and I'm so grateful..Just be a loving cuddly gran. Show them things you liked to do as a child and make as much time as you can to be with them.. Its easier than you think. Please try and relax.