A bored person is a boring person

I suppose she has friends but she doesn't need people and she is never bored

I think I am like this Scottish lady in that I am "complete" within myself. Divorced early and never wanted children. I dont even have a pet.

Back when I was an academic (1990s) I was visiting Lisbon with some colleagues and they wanted to visit the cathedral. Unfortunately I had a nail poking through the heel of my shoe and every step was agony. There was nothing I could do to correct it. I told them to take as long as they liked as I was quite happy to sit in the little coffee shop outside and wait for them. They were inside for over an hour but the time seemed to pass much more quickly. I enjoy "people watching" so long as I have somewhere comfortable to sit.

My colleagues asked if I had been bored. The answer was no. No i-phones or smartphones back then,

Tell that to my kids! The most chaos they’ve ever created was because they were bored

I wonder if you can volunteer in the local town?

Volunteers tend to make new friends.

I agree NotSpaghetti .
I volunteer for a couple of worthwhile projects.
When my DM was old and lonely she signed up to be visited by students from her local university.
A new student would be allocated each year. She gave them tea or sherry and they talked.
Some of those students kept up with her for years. One invited her to his 21st, another to her wedding and at least one was at her funeral.

Try volunteering, there are so many charities in need of help, Citizen Advice, village hall committees, Age Concern, Woodland Trust, there is so much choice. Our Council has a central body dealing with volunteering that has masses of information. It is a wonderful way to meet like-minded people.
I was listening to Dr Mosley on the radio yesterday who was advocating learning new skills to keep your mind working, He suggested trying three new things: physical, mental and creative. I do a Duolingo stint in Dutch every day, I am not very good but I now really enjoy it, the satisfaction when I get 100% for an exercise! I garden most days when my back allows and belong to a writing group so am doing my best to keep my brain cells functioning and am never bored.

Well I speak French and English all the time, do lots of gardening, reading and quordling and U3A in French.
I will however happily admit to suffering from periods of boredom throughout my life especially during my childhood.
I don't think there is any intrinsic virtue in never suffering from boredom. Why should there be? Is it not part of the human condition?

Since retiring I’m never bored, I relish everyday that I can please myself what I do. We all have to make our own “bucket lists “ and follow out own hearts as none of us know what next week may bring and life’s for living . Ive decluttered everywhere and that’s very liberating ! I also live in a village, so I go on long walks and visit friends and go out to lunch. I have 2 sons, one in Kent and one in Jersey and am very lucky as I flit between the 2. My heart is in travelling and have had some amazing holidays, with many more on my list. In the winter months I make patchwork throws ….. so you really need to have a good long walk in the woods and delve into your heart to find out what makes you happy….. good luck.

Have you thought about volunteering - maybe at a local school.

Listening to the children reading and helping them along their way is very rewarding.

You can also do this online, there are various companies around that set things up for you.

That is only if you like children though!

Maybe we all have our own versions of bored? I enjoy my own company - but still do need to see others, at times, talk or go on outings with them. Without my dog I might be too reclusive, though. Perhaps the op could 'borrow' a dog - by offering to walk one?

A change really helps with escaping a tiresome routine. Right now, I'm having a 'holiday at home'. No housework (except essentials), no appointments - and no cooking for a week. I'm still gardening (but only because I enjoy it), reading my book and watching films.

I bought salad and snacks (popcorn and ice cream for once) and I've had a couple of takeaways. It's not extravagant - as I'm not going on holiday this year - so why not?

I was going to suggest a dog , but if hubbies not keen are there any animal shelters locally? They usually need volunteers

I have never been bored as such, there’s always something to do. I live in a town. But saying that if I’m not out and about I’m either reading, gardening, watching tele which is quite rare in the daytime, crosswords,or going for a long walk which I love. I do like my own company too though,

Husband is in an emotional vacuum since retirement and this is now affecting you. I suspect he is liable to a mild depression if not dealt with. This could be an endless loop for You! So You have to take action!

I can see how you are bored. I know of more women who end up leaving the house to go volunteer or find a nice little side-hustle of a part time job (both leading to new friendships, new interests) once the non-motivated hubby has parked himself in his easy chair for the day.

It may sound selfish to say you have to strike out on your own and start doing things for yourself but it’s vital. Take care of yourself.

I do disagree with the notion of not getting a dog just because OH does not want one… sometimes another little joyful beating heart in the house is enough to open up a new space that unites everyone. Go for it.

Wishing you well!
USA Gundy

How about Borrow My Doggy www.borrowmydoggy.com/
One of my friends joined this when her dog passed away, so far she has one 'borrowed' dog and is now really friendly with his owner.

ever thought of meditation/minfulness? when you do it you realise your thoughts are not bored. Some folk can sit with themselves and love it, others hate it.

Sidelined, Maybe not get another dog if your OH is not keen but how about fostering a dog as a halfway measure? I don't feel content unless I have a dog. I'm aware rescue centres don't like giving young dogs to older people but a foster may be possible as it's short term. Other people may know more about that than me and it might be possible.

Sidelined Please tell me how you cope with boredom - I need some excellent ideas please.

You asked, my days as follows, I'm not bored.

I walk dogs, exercise extensively, daily and hoover dog hair.
I read and study my Bible daily, and talk to God.
I cook every bite we eat, 3-5 hours daily plus clean up.
Our children, GC, GGC are round often, I cook/clean for them.
I shop online, for our needs to be delivered.
I dislike being out of home&garden, but we do have others in.
I read online news and economics.
I do my husband's business money.

That seems enough to keep me content.

Volunteer with the National Trust one or more days a week, or possibly some other organisation. With the NT you meet lots of similar-minded people both the volunteers and the visitors. You get to know a lot about the property and there are often social events. I have two particular friends there and we meet for coffee or walks at other times. Your travelling expenses are paid. Give it a try, I love it.

What is the reason for not getting another dog? I can understand it if the intention is to travel or ( this is why we took a year out from having one) do other things that having a dog restrict you from doing. My dear cousin, sadly now deceased had a succession of older dogs from the Dogs Trust because it got her out of the house and away from her husband.

Whoever told you that a bored person is boring was certainly unbearable rude!

I honestly believe we can all be bored at times, but you seem to be going through a time where boredom is chronic and is getting you down.

Have you tried going along to the nearest public library and looking through their leaflets on places of interest in your vicinity, clubs, activities or so on?

If your husband is recently retired now is the time to sit down and discuss what you as a couple, but also as two individuals want to use your retirement for, and then find out how you can do at least some of the things you come up with.

Hobbies are fine, but they don't as a general rule get you out and about, so they shouldn't take up the majority of your time, unless you are housebound due to poor health.

Have you tried volunteering? It can be quite a good way of meeting others as long as you are interested in whatever you are doing as a volunteer. I volunteer at our local museum, and am relaxing now after a srenuous but enjoyable three days with holiday activities for school-children.

This may well not be your cup of tea, but some other form of voluntary work might be.

We try to make sure that every day does't run according to the same timetable and that one day a week is completely unplanned. This is what suits us and staves off boredom, but again, it may not suit you.

I am just airing some suggestions in the hope that one may suggest a way forward to you.

Well thank you everyone for your great ideas and insights. They are much appreciated. Thank you 😁

As you are able to go online how about signing up a Virtual WI there are quite a few to choose from. You can go as a guest to each of them and then join one you like the most. They meet once a month and have demonstrations and speakers, one I did they had a demonstration of making chocolate eggs it was very interesting. They have clubs the same and ordinary WIs but they do them on line. The groups are ladies from all round the country so you get to hear about different parts of the country and some have members from Canada and Australia and New Zealand. They are good fun have a look at some here: www.thewi.org.uk/join-and-support-us/become-a-member/virtual-wis

I don’t have the time to be bored . I have a help for an hour each morning to do washing up, housework, etc. It takes me so long to get myself washed and dressed and to get my breakfast prepared and eaten. Then by the time I have read my emails and looked on Messenger at the latest photos of my greatgrandchildren is lunch time. A nap after lunch then a watch a bit of TV. After my evening meal watch a film or documentary and news.
That’s what it is like when one is a hundred years old in pain in all joints, have outlived all your friends but at least still in my own home, have lived an interesting life.

During lockdown I enjoyed adult painting by numbers. I'm not very arty but found this really absorbing.

I don't think there is any corolation between being bored and being boring. It is just one of those trite, lazy soundbites that people like to trot out with every now and then, but that has no real basis whatsoever.

And I say that as someone who almost certainly is a boring person, but I am rarely if ever bored.
I have many interests and activities that I am happy to do on my own. I would also say that I have a tenancy become a bit obsessed with some of my interests and definitely in danger of boring anyone polite enough or foolish enough to listen to me talking about them.

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