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Leaving something on your plate you dislike

(80 Posts)
bytheway Sun 16-Jul-23 13:03:09

Last weekend we took the family out for lunch.

On this occasion, there was 5 adults and 5 children.

My son, aged 38, (who is single with no children) pulled a face when his fish and chips arrived at the table…the reason being that they had put a tablespoon of coleslaw on the side of the plate.

He then started to moan that he hated coleslaw, it hadn’t been stated on the menu and why had it been put on his plate!

He then carefully pushed it all to one end, moaning as he went with a face looking sullen and annoyed.

Was I wrong to feel annoyed that my 38 year old son acted like this, he is generally a moaner but really why not just shove it to one side and get on with your meal. That’s the sort of behaviour you see in a small child not a grown man.

He did then eat the meal…and pudding but honestly, his face couldn’t have tripped him up any more and I was slightly embarrassed to see that behaviour in my own son!

timetogo2016 Mon 17-Jul-23 14:36:58

A spoilt brat springs to mind,give him a dummy next time,or better still don`t invite him.

amazonia Mon 17-Jul-23 14:34:46

Of course he doesn't have to like coleslaw. None of us have to like any foods for any reason. A polite request to the waiter to have his F&C re plated would have solved the problem. Appalling behaviour by a grown man. No wonder he doesn't have a partner.

Ziplok Mon 17-Jul-23 14:29:49

Yes, he was certainly being rather childish about it all. A fuss over nothing on his part, I’m aftraid.

Oldbat1 Mon 17-Jul-23 14:26:46

Now would i pull faces at food I dislike???? The answer is yes! My list is long of foods i cannot stand and certainly do not want on my plate. One reason i very very rarely eat out. They should stipulate exactly what they are serving.

nexus63 Mon 17-Jul-23 14:09:37

i would have just called the waitress over and said i am sorry but i am allergic to onions or cabbage, whatever was in it and asked for a fresh serving, if my 37 yo son moaned i would have asked for him. i always say just fish and chips or with a toastie just lettuce and tomato. i don't see any point in moaning if you are not going to do something about it.

Gundy Mon 17-Jul-23 14:09:12

Really? What a spoiled brat! He should be ashamed of himself. (38??? 🙄) Absolutely not a good example or peer for the rest of his family, nieces, nephews.

I’m sure you did not raise him that way. Something happened along the way to make him act like that.

I hope he sees this.
USA Gundy

Saggi Mon 17-Jul-23 13:51:33

If he’d been my 40 year old son …I’d have told him to stop complaining….to eat his dinner….and if he didn’t cheer up…I’d come over and slap his ‘dannies’….( hands) in our family!! Indeed I wouldn’t expect my 11 and 16 year old grandkids to behave so moronically or rudely!

Maggiemaybe Mon 17-Jul-23 13:44:49

Well yes, there’s no need for pulling faces and sulking. But there’s no need for unexpected additions to an item on the menu either. I dislike coleslaw too and would have felt a bit miffed if it had landed unannounced and unrequested on my plate.

Worst case scenario, it could have caused problems for someone with a dairy allergy or intolerance. The cafe needs to be more aware.

AshleysGran Mon 17-Jul-23 13:36:27

Violent aversion to some foods can be a characteristic of Asperger's/autism.

grandtanteJE65 Mon 17-Jul-23 13:30:54

No, you are not unreasonable being annoyed by your son's childish behaviour, especially when there were children present.

What I find unreasonable is that you did not tell your son to stop behaving in such a childish manner, unless of course you would have allowed one of the children present to do so, or their parents would.

Had my son behaved like this, I would have asked him to desist or to call the waiter over, explain politely that he dislikes coleslaw and ask for his fish and chips to be served on a plate without them.

Nannashirlz Mon 17-Jul-23 13:15:32

Is your baby and he’s still expecting to be treated as one. If one of mine had done something like that I wouldn’t have Sat saying nothing I would have confronted them for acting like a child lol

win Mon 17-Jul-23 13:14:53

I can’t eat coleslaw as it has onions in it, so would not have been best pleased. I would have asked for the f&c to be re-plated and that would have been the end of it. The restaurant was actually breaking the law all homemade dishes has to have the ingredients listed on the menu. Having said that your son behaved badly without a doubt better to have asserted himself politely and left it at that.

nanna8 Mon 17-Jul-23 13:14:30

My 4 year old granddaughter would have better manners than that. Don’t go out with him again, get takeaway. Someone I know (adult) is like that and after a couple of evenings out together I would never, ever, go out with her again except for a cup of coffee.

ParlorGames Mon 17-Jul-23 13:12:53

What a silly little boy you have raised! Little wonder that he is still single.
Whilst I do agree that it was rather an odd combination he should have manned up and either offered the coleslaw to someone who like it or simply moved it to the side of the plate and got on with the fish and chips.

Foxygloves Mon 17-Jul-23 13:09:58

Yes, he was being childish - in fact he gave being childish a bad name.

Tanjamaltija Mon 17-Jul-23 13:06:16

Did he ask if anyone wanted it? Yesterday I ate my son's cucumbers... His pouting spoiled your enjoyment... not nice.

Redhead56 Sun 16-Jul-23 20:21:33

I would have told him to put it to one side and get on with it. You was irritated because he displayed immature behaviour I don't blame you.

Primrose53 Sun 16-Jul-23 19:40:05

Some people are most peculiar about food and really are like big children. I have a friend who is now 70 and have known her for about 30 years. Her relationship with food is almost childlike. She hates the mention of salad, vegetables, fruit or anything healthy so if we go out she has to have something like steak and kidney pudding with potatoes and gravy or scampi and chips.

I am not exaggerating when I say I have seen her almost cry if we go to an event or function and the food is not to her liking. She puts on a whining voice too and at first it shocked me but I am used to it now.

Beetlejuice Sun 16-Jul-23 19:26:53

Perhaps OP could take him a colouring book and some crayons next time they eat out. man children are often better behaved when they're occupied.

Kim19 Sun 16-Jul-23 17:59:11

I wouldn't include him in my next invitation but I would explain this to him first in private.

Germanshepherdsmum Sun 16-Jul-23 17:58:11

I wondered that Primrose. But at 38 surely he could either have asked the waiter for a meal without the garnish (perhaps saying he’s allergic to it) or simply have enjoyed the rest of the meal without making such a childish fuss, especially at a family lunch which OP was paying for. There are foodstuffs that many of us dislike, but as adults we deal with them especially if someone else is paying
I’m not surprised he’s single.

Primrose53 Sun 16-Jul-23 17:38:13

Wondering if he might be on the autistic spectrum. My niece’s son is and he is 12. he will only eat beige food, apart from a small amount of baked beans and they have to be in a separate dish and not touching any other food.

Summerfly Sun 16-Jul-23 17:03:56

I’m afraid I wouldn’t have been happy having coleslaw on my plate. I can’t bear any of what’s on my plate to touch each other. I know it may sound odd, but I can’t help it. Always been the same, but I wouldn’t dream of whinging about it in a restaurant!

BlueBelle Sun 16-Jul-23 17:01:51

Well obviously youre far more sensitive than me Beetlejuice as the poster says he’s always been a moaner I d have just thought ohh here we go again and thought no more about it
Not really something to chew your lip over is it ? He ate his food just had a grumble about it I bet the kids were too busy ploughing into theirs to even notice

Cabbie21 Sun 16-Jul-23 16:46:35

He set a poor example to the children present. Very immature behaviour, though I sympathise with the sentiment, as I don’t eat coleslaw and would not have expected it.
Best to try to ignore him.