Gransnet forums

Ask a gran

Asking for a lift.

(50 Posts)
Cabbie21 Sun 29-Oct-23 20:01:58

Would you think a neighbour or an acquaintance was really cheeky if they asked you for a lift?
Would it depend on the circumstances or would you automatically agree or make an excuse/ refuse?

coco12 Sun 29-Oct-23 20:08:27

Probably depends, is it temporary? I sound awful but I wouldn't want to get into a regular expected thing. A one off certainly I would

crazyH Sun 29-Oct-23 20:10:09

I don’t think that’s cheeky at all, if it’s a one-off, but if it becomes a habit, I’d be annoyed. A couple of my neighbours don’t drive, due to medical conditions and I’ve often given them lifts. But I have to say, they have only asked for lifts into town, when they knew that I was going anyway.

Grammaretto Sun 29-Oct-23 20:29:03

I've been waiting for a cataract operation so prefer not to drive though I am still legal
I have often accepted lifts but don't ask. I wait for them to offer
We have an efficient bus service but when it's raining or involves 2 buses, I gladly accept lifts.

My df is on my car insurance and has permission to borrow my car when she needs it. I have accepted lifts from her!

Nannytopsy Sun 29-Oct-23 20:39:15

We live 10 miles from the nearest town and hospital, in a village with lots of elderly people. I always say when I am free to help.

M0nica Sun 29-Oct-23 21:07:10

It would entirely depend on the circumstances, and I really could not be more specific than that.

Cabbie21 Sun 29-Oct-23 21:44:53

Let’s say it is for a hospital appointment, a one off, but you don’t know them well.
I guess I would feel they were being a bit cheeky, but as long as I was available, I would feel obliged to agree.
That sounds really begrudging. If it were a friend I would feel differently.

RosiesMaw Sun 29-Oct-23 21:50:08

It’s always easier to offer than to ask!
I am always happy to help out plus it makes it easier to ask if it ever becomes necessary.

NotSpaghetti Mon 30-Oct-23 00:18:33

I have offered lifts to neighbours.
I've (mostly) been lucky with them though

Georgesgran Mon 30-Oct-23 01:34:20

Is there a back story to this Cabbie21?
To be honest, if I was available I’d offer a lift to anyone, especially for a hospital appointment (if it didn’t clash with something I had to do myself).
However, I can see a downside if someone is a nervous driver, going to an unknown destination and whether it’s a one-off or expected to be a regular thing. For some, there may be the issue of ‘reward’ - offered or not, taken or refused. Years ago, I took a friend for daily radiotherapy - it was a privilege to be taken into her confidence and I made it clear, I didn’t want any payment, so she made a generous donation to Daft as a Brush instead.

mumofmadboys Mon 30-Oct-23 06:26:19

I would help if I was free. Good to feel people are able to ask you.

cornergran Mon 30-Oct-23 06:47:49

I offer lifts if I feel confident driving to the location and there is parking close by. I never mind being asked and will respond honestly about both ability and availability.

Ali08 Mon 30-Oct-23 07:43:44

Good luck to my neighbours, I can't drive 😆

Coolbreeze Mon 30-Oct-23 09:32:26

Think it would depend on how “close “ I am to the acquaintance , also if it were of importance .
If they a were a very casual acquaintance and just wanted lift to shops for example then I’d think they are cheeky and make my excuses .

Quokka Mon 30-Oct-23 09:39:02

Certainly I’d help. Various neighbours have rallied round when I needed them.

aggie Mon 30-Oct-23 09:42:38

I have never driven , I never ask for a lift , I have given up on different things due to not being able to pluck up courage to ask for a lift
I accept with gratitude any lift offered , except for two people whose cars bear the evidence of their style of bumping car driving !

1summer Mon 30-Oct-23 09:48:11

I am more than happy to help someone with a lift to hospital, doctors, or as I am only 20 minutes from our nearest airport I often take friends or family to the airport.
As long as I don’t feel as though I am being taken advantage of, at the weekend my sister in law asked me to take her to a party for an old friend of hers. She said I could stay at the party as her plus one! Fortunately I was going out with my daughter so had a good excuse to say no.

Jaxjacky Mon 30-Oct-23 10:33:14

I would as it could be me one day.

polnan Mon 30-Oct-23 12:36:43

Oh gosh, I find it very hard to ask anyone for any sort of help.

if I was going the same way, I would love to give a lift to anyone.
amongs my very small group 5 of us, only 3 drive, one of which is very ill, the person, not the car..
so down to 2 and we do lifts.. particularly if we are going out together!

Ziplok Mon 30-Oct-23 12:42:50

It really depends upon the circumstances.

Fae1 Mon 30-Oct-23 12:53:50

A neighbour asked me to drive her to work 40 miles away. I'm retired and I had the time but resented doing it after it became a habit and I had it while away a few hours while she worked to be there to drive her home again. So yes - I considered that to be very cheeky and rude. She wasn't even a friend, just someone who lived in the same road.

Theexwife Mon 30-Oct-23 13:13:52

I will offer neighbours lifts if I am going shopping and see them at the bus stop but would not commit to doing it weekly.

If someone asks for a lift to an appointment I will do it if I can.

I have asked for a lift to hospital appointments as our hospital is 22 miles away via a motorway which I don't drive on, it would take 2.5 hours by bus.

Shirls52000 Mon 30-Oct-23 13:20:56

More than happy to help with a lift to a hospital appointment, it can be difficult for people sometimes and kindness goes a long way

Judy54 Mon 30-Oct-23 13:23:14

No I would not think they were being cheeky and yes it would depend on the circumstances. Some years ago we offered a Lady I knew lifts to the club that we belonged to. Unfortunately she began to take it for granted and it became an expectation, if I was not going she became very put out and said how am I supposed to get there. I will happily help our neighbours but would be wary of an acquaintance due to past experiences.

greenlady102 Mon 30-Oct-23 13:25:50

I'd do it for some of my neighbours but not for others!....if they showed signs of expecting it to become permanent, i'd (politely) nip it in the bud