Grandson not allowed extra activities

if she lives with her parents perhaps one of them could take him.. or if she has siblings nearby.. but their decision isn't it?

My DGS is lucky enough to have 'afterschool clubs' to attend so his single mum just has to pick him up when she is finished work. I'm amazed because it's a very small school, with about 60 pupils, that it's fantastic they can do this.

My grandson's father moved so he could live nearer his son and be more involved with him.

I can see both sides for this. Could your son, father, fund a taxi to take him to and from the choosen activity? There are approved taxi that can transport children without adults present. (I know this from living in rural Scotland)

If you are on good enough terms with the boy's mother, you could ask her if the child has understood her correctly when she has said no to these activities.

Mind you, a boy of six should not be taking karate classes - he is far too young and there are far too many irresponsible karate teachers, who do not take trouble to explain that all martial arts should be used for self-defence rather than to hurt others.

As others have said, she may well feel she cannot afford these activities, or she may know that his school-work is so tiring, or so poor that time is better spent either doing homework, or playing after school and getting to bed at a reasonable hour.

You could as already suggested offer to help out with payment, but ask her, don't just go on what a six year old says, his mother says.

But be tactful, otherwise you risk being asked to mind your own business.

Just because she lives with her parents, it does not mean she gets free board and lodging. If she works, she's whacked out when she gets home, and may not be up to taking the boy here and there. 5-6miles there and back, more than once a week, means added fuel costs. Add uniforms, activities / outings, snacks...and you have a chunk of the wages going on "extras".

Maintenance payments do not cover extra curricular activities.

If your son would like him to go then he should arrange and pay for this in his own time

If your son is the one who only sees his child in school holidays... Why is he letting distance stop him doing more?

I would stay out of this before you make co-parenting even harder for them by being judgemental on situations you don't know all the facts about

I don’t think the OP is being critical or judgmental here. She’s just concerned for her grandson. It must be hard being so far away.

Perhaps it's finance! How about your son contributing to the cost of these activities. She is a single mum after all

Sadly, some children don't get to do our of school activities. Some because of time, some because lack of parents budgeting skills, and some purely because the parent(s) can't see the point.
My children were fortunate because I enabled them to join lots of clubs etc.
Some of their friends never got to do anything.
I hope you can find a way of enabling your Grandson to do at least one out of school activity. Perhaps there is another child locally who goes to an activity, so maybe the parents can take turns to take the children.
Good luck.

You need to tackle this with you son.
Or do you know his other grandparents to talk to them about how between you you can help?
Perhaps see if the school do after school football (this is quite common) but would depend on how he gets home.

Really this is none of your business. After school clubs and activities aren’t a necessity especially at six years old. He had a single mother - who may be worried about costs , time etc. she may prefer he spend his time at that young age in open ended play , and relaxing at home after school. Perhaps he needs time to get to bed early for school etc. perhaps she’s worried that what seems like small local activities easily and quickly Become
Big commitments money and time wise with travel (this is also true in my experience as both a mum and a grand ) Either way none of this is your concern or business. If you’re on food terms you Could at most mention that if grandson ever wanted to play after school football you’d love to help cover the costs. Beyond that it’s not your child to decide these things on and you should take a large step back.

It's very difficult when the mother isn't your daughter. With mine we can always go through things and thrash things out and get a result. I don't have that sort of relationship with my son's ex, although we get on pretty well. Really the most you can do is talk to your son about it. It's a shame that the little boy can't do something after school - perhaps in a year or two? I know a friend of mine never forgave her father for not letting her have ballet lessons, and I always wished my parents had helped me do some of the things I was interested in. I suppose they just didn't have the money.

There are often waiting lists for these activities. Perhaps your son could check with his ex., if it's a money issue, what about activities that cost less, eg., scouting?

It's so hard when you don't ever get a full night sleep. He's welcome here for a night

?

It sounds like something your son and his ex need to sort out.

Since he lives too far away to actively participate in getting his child to activities, it seems a bit off to me to demand that she put more on her plate. Perhaps if your son is willing to cover the extra expenses, including possibly transportation and a sitter to get the child to and from, that would make it doable. But it’s really for them to sort out

It does seem a pity that your grandson isn’t able to attend out of school/after school clubs. Usually, especially these days, the parent(s) have a network of their children’s friends’ Mums/Dads, who support each other and share the transport arrangements equally. I wonder if there is a Beavers group locally which he could join? What about his other grandparents, are they able and willing to help? I don’t suggest that you should get directly involved, whogoesthere, as this could put your relationship with them in jeopardy, but a diplomatic word with your son might be an idea?

Of course it could be that after full day at school, and his mum working full time, that she just prefers to have time together..
which I'd say is perfectly reasonable as he is only 6

Sounds like the child is playing one parent against the other.
No comment on son's involvement with his child, other than the fact that he pays maintenance. Oh, Well done!