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What would you do?

(87 Posts)
narrowboatnan Sun 16-Jun-24 10:14:34

My DD and family are going to foreign parts for two weeks in July and I have offered to house sit and dog sit. My DH (though not so Dear just now!) was coming with me but has now decided that my absence would be a good opportunity for him to get on with jobs on the boat without tripping over me and the dog (she’s coming with me). He says he’ll take me - it’s a two hour drive - and return home the next day. He is, however, very sticky about returning to collect me at the end of the fortnight. He thinks that my DD should bring me back! I pointed out that, having just returned from her holiday, with four children and a husband tired from travelling, plane delays etc would not be in a good place to add a four hour round trip onto the top of that!

I said I would go by train, but he thinks that would be unwise with an 8-month old puppy and a suitcase, especially as I have two train changes to make and then get from one end of Birmingham New Street Station to the other to make my last connection.

He has now spat his dummy out, along with throwing all his toys out of his pram and told me in no uncertain terms that “if she doesn’t bring you home then you’re not going!”

How dare he tell me what to do!! Do I (1). carry on sticking pins in my little wax doll; (2) say stuff it and go by train anyway; or (3) see if my son, who lives in the same town as my DD, to bring me back

WWYD?

nandad Mon 17-Jun-24 17:15:18

You didn’t mention the hot tub - that’s why your DH doesn’t want to stay. He’s heard all sorts about these hot tub parties and doesn’t have the right bathers for it!!!

fluttERBY123 Mon 17-Jun-24 17:52:32

What about dh and dd meeting halfway on both occasions and swapping you over. We used to do that when kids went to stay with grandparents.

4allweknow Mon 17-Jun-24 18:38:41

Surely you could stay over until DD or her DH are recovered enough to bring you home. You are putting yourself out to house and dog sit after all. Or, leave the dog at home and go by train. No way would I do that journey with puppy and a suitcase. Do you drive? If so, why not use a car.

SunnySusie Mon 17-Jun-24 19:53:26

If it were me I would go and do the dog and house sit for DD and I would decline the offer of a lift over from my DH. That way he doesnt get to have a say in any of the arrangements because none of them involve him and he hasnt done me a favour. If the price of getting a lift over is interference from other half then other half has crossed a line so far as I am concerned. Although I admit I am independent to a fault. I would either drive myself and take the car, or get a hire car with a pick up near home and drop off near the destination, or go on the train and leave the puppy at home. I would not only do the house and pet sit, I would probably clean the entire house, re-stock the groceries and cook a fabulous meal for the returning family. Indeed I have done all those things. I remember so well how hard I had to work when my children were small and what little help I had from any family member. I never want my 'kids' to go through that. Perhaps I am too soft on them?

Norah Mon 17-Jun-24 21:27:05

narrowboatnan

There have been some really funny and some really helpful suggestions, thank you all so much. I’ve had three offers of a lift home from friends, all of whom are itching to see my boaty home.

I can’t have my DD’s dogs here, they are two very energetic Red Setters and there simply isn’t room.

I’m actually looking forward to going, it’s my ‘home town’ and I have a list of friends to catch up with. Besides, DD has a hot tub in the garden that I’m looking forward to trying out

Have fun! Lovely offers, good decision!

MamaB247 Mon 17-Jun-24 21:29:23

Tell him you are.going and if he is that bothered either he comes and collects you or you do as you want and go on train. My puppy loves a train ride.

Susiewong65 Mon 17-Jun-24 21:29:55

Why doesn’t your husband join for for the last couple of days and then you can return home together.

hamster58 Mon 17-Jun-24 22:24:42

Susiewong65, I think that’s an excellent idea. Turn it into a mini holiday 😊

NotSpaghetti Tue 18-Jun-24 01:16:41

I think narrowboatnan has had offers now and all will be fine.
👍

Helenlouise3 Tue 18-Jun-24 08:47:07

I would do what makes you feel happiest. You don't want to go and fret about the outcome. However, I'd be hopping mad if my hubby thought it was ok to tell me I couldn't do something . After all it's his daughter too and he's the one that decided to opt out of the arrangement.

Dowsabella Tue 18-Jun-24 13:59:10

So glad you got it sorted, narrowboatnan! Hope you have a lovely time catching up with friends in your hometown. (And enjoy the hot tub this chilly weather smile!)