Gransnet forums

Ask a gran

Does anyone still miss their parents?

(134 Posts)
LaCrepescule Sun 27-Oct-24 08:10:43

I’m 67. Mum died in January aged 92 and dad has been gone since 2015 - he was 88. They both had long lives and were only ill towards the end. I know how lucky I was but find myself only now grieving for them, especially mum. After she died I mainly felt relief.
I dream about her all the time and just wish she was here.
My childhood wasn’t perfect but I was very much loved and they did their best. I’m single with a lovely 24 year old daughter who has just moved out and I’m wondering if her leaving has anything to do with my intense feelings of grief.
Life is impermanent and nothing stays the same. Yet I hang on to these feelings of wanting them here when they both had good long lives. Perhaps I should just finally let myself grieve so I can be at peace with their passings and just feel gratitude that I had them.
How much harder it is for you who have lost partners. I wish those of you in that situation love and strength.
Who here misses their parents still in a way that makes them more sad than it should?

MissAdventure Sun 03-Nov-24 11:11:36

I'd love to have a good old chat with my mum again.
We lost that, due to the fact that she wouldn't even consider earing aids, so it was barely worth talking together like we used to.

MissAdventure Sun 03-Nov-24 11:12:21

Earing aids. 🤭

HowVeryDareYou2 Sun 03-Nov-24 13:54:55

My dad had "earing" aids, kept the damned things switched off "to save the batteries" grin

MissAdventure Sun 03-Nov-24 14:11:28

My mum used to do that with her mobile phone.
Turn it on, make a call, then turn it off again, so you couldn't reach her, and ended up having to go round and check she was OK.

GrannyGravy13 Sun 03-Nov-24 14:21:23

My darling Mum died 7 1/2 years ago, I think about her every day, it gets easier, but my heart still aches.

I think about my Dad and I do miss him, but in a different sort of way…

cc Sun 03-Nov-24 14:32:51

kwest

Oh yes , more than I can say. they both died in their mid-50s within a year of each other. Both sudden and unexpected. I have children coming up to the age of my parents' death now. I was lucky to have wonderful parents and I am lucky to have an amazing husband and children and grandchildren but in a quiet private moment I sometimes still shed a tear for my parents.

Yes, my father was only just 60 and now I am 72. I think how much of his life he missed and how long my mother lived alone: 30 years.

HeavenLeigh Sun 03-Nov-24 16:18:35

Yes very much so miss both mum n dad. I’ve always missed them mum died in 03 dad in 2015. I don’t know why but I find myself thinking about them more as I get older

Katyj Sun 03-Nov-24 19:04:33

HeavenLeigh
I think this must happen a lot, my mum in her last years talked a lot about her mum and dad and her brother and sister that had passed. She often looked very sad and wistful when talking about them.
She used to say she wanted to be young again and part of a family, she hated living alone and was very lonely. There’s nothing to get old for is there sad