Wedding photos

@crosstichfan are you always so judgemental ? 🙄

Really?
You would rather miss your son's wedding than appear in a photograph?
Absurd.

I think there is a possibility of a compromise here. Could y ou speak to them and agree that you will be just in the couple of photos where there is both sides of the family or the bridge and groom and parents, and that is all they will ask of you. That you will be excused any further pictures and that there will definitely be no pressure to ask you to do more. That way you are part of the wedding day and they can look back to see you as part of it in the future and to show grandchildren in the future. The backstop for you could be that you mention beforehand that you feel slightly naseus or that your stomach is causing you a few problems, which may be true of course. Then no one will be surprised when you ask to be excused and can disappear off to the ladies while the rest of the photos are taken. This way you will be in control of what happens, whilst showing that you are putting them first. Good luck and hope the day goes well.

If you search on line there are many items listing ways to become more photogenic. You could practice them if you have a phone or camera which can take selfies, then delete them.
One method I always use is to press your tongue to the roof of your mouth to firm and lift the chin!
I hope you make the decision to attend and enjoy it!

oh for goodness sake be in the photos then enjoy the rest of the day. No one will be looking at how you look but at bride and groom!

years ahead when any children may be looking at the group they will wonder where you are! and why you were not there indeed.

LOUISA1523

@crosstichfan are you always so judgemental ? 🙄

That’s unfair! I had made it clear I wasn’t criticising you in any way shape or form. I was simply curious. However, if you want to take it the way you have, then perhaps you are the judgemental one.
I am shocked that my comment has been taken this way and I think it’s people like you who are the reason people stop posting. They are scared to open their mouths because someone will jump right in.

I hate having my photo taken but I would just think well it’s not about me and what I like or don’t, it’s about the bride and grooms day

Going to sound horrible but this is selfish it’s not your day compromise, just be in a couple of photos I would hate this if I was your daughter in law
One of my daughters hates having her photo taken with or without me and always says don’t show anyone so to all intents and purposes it feels as if I prefer my other children as I have loads of photos of me with them
I have my privacy settings tight on all social media only close friends and family but they must think I m not in the least bit proud of this daughter
The daft part is she is actually very beautiful and always looks lovely so disappointing for me I want to show her off as much as I do the others

My late mother hated her photo taken but agreed to be on some of my wedding photos, so glad she did they are the only photos we have of her she died not long afterwards.

Perhaps you don’t like photographs because you see yourself as others see you Such a shame don’t let it spoil their day and incidentally yours

How sad

Think about your son and not yourself. Believe it or not the wedding is NOT all about you!

I think everyone has acknowledged the fact that we know it's all about the bride and groom, but for those of us who absolutely loathe having our photo taken, that doesn't make the process any less uncomfortable. Believe it or not, we honestly don't want to spoil anyone's day. Telling people just to get over it really isn't helpful.

I think I was so happy my DS had found a lovely girl that I didn't think about me.
I felt happy, too, when someone told me I looked lovely, what a smart outfit. 🙂
Then she spoilt it by saying "You look just like the Queen Mother in that hat." 😯 The Queen Mother was over 100 at that time.

Suck it up. They deserve having family at their wedding, and they deserve a record of it.

Viceversa you just have to suck it up and put the daughter or son first that’s not being unkind it’s being honest and sometimes a bit of truth is what is needed even if it’s not comfortable to hear
There are lots of things we all hate doing but you pull your big girl knickers up and do it anyway …we all have hot spots and they get hotter and more uncomfortable the older you get 😳

I get that, and if you'd read my earlier comments in the thread, you'd see that's exactly what I did at both my son's and daughter's weddings. I just feel some people have been very dismissive of what can be a real concern (even verging on phobia) for some people.

Then they need counselling or hypnotism or some kind of treatment if it’s bordering on phobias viceversa
I do understand I have hot spots myself I bet we all do

I do read others posts

ViceVersa is right.
Please don't be dismissive of genuine worries.

My Ds3 got married last year and like you I hate having my photo taken, but I wouldn’t have missed his wedding for anything. I was in a few photos, but they weren’t as bad as I was expecting. Go and enjoy celebrating the next stage of your sons life.

I share your loathing of having my photo taken.

However I now think that in 100 years from now, nobody will care, maybe 50 years from now.

Photos today have lost all impact. Most young adults have thousands of photos of themselves . But nobody will really care in years to come.

I hate having my photo taken too, but I was only in a couple at my son's wedding and tried to look happy!
Why don't you get somebody to help you to put on some natural looking make up? It does make a big difference in a photo if you do this, particularly a little mascara and lipstick in a fairly natural colour.

And maybe a relaxing glass of champagne first?

The photos of me at my son's wedding are pretty grim to be honest...
My mother-in-law liked them but then her eyesight isn't terrific!
Nobody except her has any on the wall though so that's fine!

The ones taken by a different photographer at her 100th birthday are quite a lot better than the wedding ones.

My mother had only one photo of her brother at her wedding and he was obscured as he was "hiding at the back". She always felt sad about it as he died soon after.

Do find a way to be there please Lizzie

My mum hated having her pkhoto taken as did my best friend from university, but both were in my wedding photos and my friend was in her daughter's photos as she sent me copies! I have a numer of photos of her running away, from our youth and very few of my mum.