My daughter's partner

Pleased it was a helpful time for you and I am sure it was for KN. Hope you feel just a little lighter. X

Sounds as though it was a positive day Alie. Hope it lifted your spirits a little and allowed you to hope for a happier future. xx

It's the best day so far, actually. I will get through this.

Goodnight all

Dear Alie I don't know your past story but any death and particularly a suicide leaves indentations on everyone around that person I would like to add my thoughts and support to you and the boys Again like you I don't have much belief but we can really really hope and get some comfort from that hope

Thanks BB....we don't even really know yet that it was suicide.

I was talking to L last night and she is hoping that it was an accident still, even though she knows he has been suicidal. But she hardly can take in that he is gone yet.

I believe it was - I tried to argue with him, a couple of weeks before, had to say in the end it was his decision - and now he's dead. At a place and time that says he meant it.

On Tuesday we may learn more from the police.

Oh yeah....? - no contact from police. L tried earlier but she wasn't there. I will phone them soon!

I managed to contact the right policewoman and she's coming on Friday evening when the tox. results will probably be in.

That's good Alie, at least it should remove any doubts, which may help you all to deal with the aftermath. Not knowing is possibly harder to come to terms with.

We (family) finally got to talk to the police yesterday evening. We will go on with doubts, I'm afraid. It just isn't clear whether he intended it or not.

A rather sleazy and miserable death, for someone who always had potential, and couldn't use it.

Alie

The inquest has been opened (yesterday, before we knew), and will be in October...

Sorry you've been bereaved again. I find your comment about sleazy and miserable rather offensive and unnecessary. Having lost someone close to me to suicide I can only hope that the comment is made in frustration and anger? Sadly you will always have more questions than answers.

I am not putting the details the police told us on here.

Frustration and anger, yes, but no intention to be offensive to anyone. I''m sorry for your bereavement.

Just to make it absolutely clear, I was talking about this particular death and no other, it was not a general comment!

(((hugs))) Alie. I think most of us understood your meaning and it probably just touched a raw nerve for another poster.

Hope you are ok!

Alie I am so sorry for you losses. You need all the comfort and support that usually GN are able to supply. A couple of years ago, our neighbour took his own life and although we were not related, we had grown fond of the couple. I still haven't got over it, and know that the slightest thing can bring back memories, good and bad. I hope you are as alright as you can be at this sad time. {{{hugs}}} and best wishes to you.

Rather belated thanks, folks.
I just received the Order of Service for next week's funeral by email......really brought it home to me that he is gone.

Sorry to hear about your neighbour, Auntieflo.
Yes, it can be very little things. When I had seen the police, on the way back the two policewomen were chatting about what to eat later, and they asked me what I had for my dinner, I told them. Then I remembered that my daughter, phoning me quite often, would always ask what I'd had to eat - I'd forgotten! and I broke down in tears......
so they came in the house and made me a cup of tea, so nice.

Also the neighbour across the road who was woken up by the police before, he and his whole family are being very supportive too.

Sad to read this. lots of support here?

My DD is struggling to cope with the suicide of her young brother-in-law. They feel they 'should have known'.

So sad for you Alie. I can't imagine how hard it must be after the loss of your daughter too.

We do think and wonder when anyone commits suicide - how could I not have known, had some indication? I remember chatting to a work colleague with whom I was quite friendly many many years ago; we had lunch together in the canteen and he was more chatty and forthcoming than he had ever been about work matters, a problem at work to which he said he had the answer, his wife etc etc so I was extremely shocked to realise that he had gone home and committed suicide that night.

We think - why and what could I have said that may have made a difference?
Other people I knew too and I still wonder if I should have known.

I did know Kieron had texted me about suicide..... seems nobody else wanted to believe him, I saw him go further and further downhill over two months, although he left here and at the last was only communicating by texts, the last three days before.

What I have heard about him two days before, fits with what I have read - that once the decision is made, the person seems happier.

We still don't know, however, if it was intended in this case....

Alie, are you OK, I think you said said that the funeral is to be sometime this week. All my thoughts go to you, and doubtless, all the other supportive GN's here.
Love and hugs.

It's tomorrow. Thanks for thinking of us.
No idea who will turn up, and some may not be wanted....

Sounds mean, but things have happened with two separate lots of people when they should not have done.
Kieron did have some dodgy friends...it's worrying.
You never know how people will react to each other.

However. I went to the funeral place yesterday to leave a small box of mementos to go in the coffin.
I met the funeral director and she used to be a bouncer!! and assured me that she is used to dealing with anything that happens at funerals. Sounds better.

I have written a short letter to Kieron which I will read out.
Not worried about that though.
Thanks again.

Hope tomorrow goes peacefully for you Alie