Gransnet forums


Sibling loss

(42 Posts)
hulahoop Tue 19-Dec-17 14:36:26

My lovely sister who had a lot of health problems died peacefully at the weekend don't know why but I just felt the need to write it down sorry if it's not a good post for Christmas week ?

MissAdventure Tue 19-Dec-17 14:40:07

Its perfectly fine to post it, and I'm so sorry for your loss. It doesn't matter the circumstances, its horribly hard to bear. flowers

baubles Tue 19-Dec-17 14:40:28

My condolences hulahoop. flowers

Alima Tue 19-Dec-17 14:40:43

I am so sorry for your loss hulahoop, hard to bear at any time but especially so now. My adored brother now seems lost to Altzeimers now too. I know how you feel.

Humbertbear Tue 19-Dec-17 14:45:29

I can’t imagine how you must be feeling but we will all be thinking of you this Christmas.

ginny Tue 19-Dec-17 14:55:20

Sorry for your loss. No need to apologise for writing it here, whatever helps.

Bathsheba Tue 19-Dec-17 14:57:07

So sorry to read of your loss hulahoop. What a terribly sad thing to happen so close to Christmas, but I hope you can take comfort from the fact that her death was peaceful and she is no longer suffering with her health. Sincere condolences flowers

Nonnie Tue 19-Dec-17 15:12:24

I lost my sister to Ataxia, it is hard watching one you love deteriorate. Maybe a tiny bit of comfort in knowing your sister is no longer suffering?

paddyann Tue 19-Dec-17 15:22:09

its horrible isn't it I lost my sister on the 19th of December a few years ago ,she was cremated on the 23rd,it was awful especially for mum as Dad had died just months previously .Me ...I walked a lot to clear my head and went to work ,mum had lots of support and a good neighbour who insisted we didn't cry and upset her an as I couldn't guarantee I could stay dry eyed I kept busy .We celebrated Christmas as normal for the kids and the noise and laughter and old stories about my sister really helped mum she told me later.You just have to cope in your own way and if writing it and getting feedback helps you then go for it,We're all of an age where we've lost people and we might be able to help .Be kind to yourself ,and let others be kind

ffinnochio Tue 19-Dec-17 15:56:06

Sincere condolences hulahoop flowers

rockgran Tue 19-Dec-17 15:56:43

So sad. moon

NannyTee Tue 19-Dec-17 15:59:24

Heartfelt wishes flowers

Luckygirl Tue 19-Dec-17 16:00:22

I am so sorry to hear this. Siblings can be so important in life, as they shared so much with you. I saw my sister yesterday for the first time in a very long while and it was very special, so your post really resonated with me. I truly am very sorry for your loss. flowers

GrandmaMoira Tue 19-Dec-17 16:02:23

Sorry for your loss.

TerriBull Tue 19-Dec-17 16:02:52

Sorry for your bereavement hulahoop, I lost my brother to a brain tumour a couple of years ago, he was in his early 60s, not that old in this day and age. In spite of having my own children and grandchildren neverthless losing every member of my original family has left me with a sense of loss.

hulahoop Tue 19-Dec-17 16:05:06

Thanks for your replies we will celebrate Christmas as normal she loved children and would be the first to say enjoy yourselves I agree paddyann as we get older we have to get used to losing people best wishes to all ?

morethan2 Tue 19-Dec-17 16:11:57

I am so very sorry for your loss hulahoop just the thought of loosing my beloved sister is unbearable so I can barely imagine your grief. I hope you have others close by who can comfort you.
Your right though there’s somthing cathartic about writing things down. There’ll always be one of us here to listen/read and respond.

Fennel Tue 19-Dec-17 16:20:31

Condolences from me too, hulahoop.
She "died peacefully", so that was a blessing. But still hard for those who loved her left behind.

Anniebach Tue 19-Dec-17 16:22:45

I am so deeply sorry, allow your self to grieve, and do talk here when you wish x

nanaK54 Tue 19-Dec-17 16:23:02

Please accept my sincere condolences hulahoop flowers

M0nica Tue 19-Dec-17 16:37:47

hulahoop, all my condolences, My sister died on an Easter Sunday, such a contradiction when these losses occur near a big family and religious celebration.

When a sibling dies, part of your life dies with them, those childhood memories that only the two of you had, your secrets, and intimacies

Sibling loss is never really recognised for the loss it is. When DS died, although in her 40s she had no partner or children, so everyone gave all their thoughts to our parents. Our grief as siblings was never thought of.

Bellasnana Tue 19-Dec-17 17:09:15

Heartfelt condolences from me too. It hurts so much to lose a dear sister. I've lost both mine and I feel for you, I really do. flowers

grannyactivist Tue 19-Dec-17 17:12:19

I have had two brothers die; one in childhood and the other as a young adult - the youngest died in December 1967 and I have though of him at Christmastime every year since. So sorry for your loss hulahoop. flowers

midgey Tue 19-Dec-17 17:12:40

Thinking about you Hulahoop flowers

Grandma70s Tue 19-Dec-17 17:27:23

So sorry to hear this, hulahoop.

MOnica is so right when she says that ‘our grief of siblings was never thought of’. I’ve been guilty of this myself. My son had a friend whose brother was tragically killed in his mid-teens. I said “Oh, how terrible for his parents”. “For his brother, too” my son said quietly. I learnt from that, I hope.