Financials

When my husband died after many years of disability, we had been living abroad and I was pretty sure there was little or nothing left of our capital - which proved to be correct. Additionally I was young enough not to be entitled to any widow's benefit from his state pension . However on digging through papers I found three occupational pensions which he hadn't claimed because the amounts involved weren't worth it. But as a surviving spouse they paid out as lump sums; not a huge amount but enough for me to buy a (very) modest house in a (very) cheap city in the UK. I've gone back to work and will probably have to keep going until I drop dead but at least I'm supporting myself. So things could be a lot worse!

I am so sorry for the pain and worry you must be going through. I do think it might be better to try to find out now than when he actually passes and you are grieving. You need to ask yourself a few questions. 1. Does dh have a pension and if yes can you access the paperwork so you can see if you will get half rate? 2. You should be entitled to some OAP if not in your own right then from your dh payments. Try to find out how much that is by writing to NIC and they will tell you. 3. If you will be living alone you may get pension credit top up and council tax reduction. You need to apply to get any help so do not put it off when the time comes. You may qualify for a hardship fund to help with funeral costs. Do you have a dc who could help you to find out what you may be entitled to? Just a thought if you care for dh and he is very ill could you claim cares allowance? If you can claim it do so. You may find when living alone your general water, food and heating costs go down.

Very good advice form Lindylou. Death of a loved on is awful to deal with and your mind is not always clear so having a help sheet with all account numbers and passwords on would be a very loving thing to do for your partner or children. I leave a sticky note on my computer with all important passwords for pensions and bank accounts and states where will is kept but will make a note to myself to make it more detailed and update regularly.

AlgesWifeVal - So sorry that your husband is so very ill and on top of this you have the financial worry. Many of us are faced with a shortfall when our partners pass away. My father was very worried as to how he would cope but unfortunately or fortunately whichever way you look at it, he found he had terminal cancer just week's after mum died. My husband and I are concerned. When one of us passes we have a £4000 shortfall, that's without running a car and here in the sticks we need to drive for as long as we are safe to do so!!! (that's no doubt been covered in another thread!) We are unable to downsize, (dog kennel is going too far!). We are not supposed to sublet, but the only way I see it is for me to let out the 2nd bedroom. My husband wouldn't be able to do that though. I have looked at selling up and renting, but that would cost more than staying where I am and who would want to share with an oldie? We try to put it at the back of our minds. I think one possibility, and I appreciate it's fraught with the obvious problems, it to share with someone of a similar age, but someone who doesn't need to make a profit.

Check from your husband's pension provider to what you are entitled. You will receive an extra amount from your husband's state pension on top of your own, well I did anyway. Citizens Advice are a great place for advice if you can't afford a decent solicitor. I lost £28 thousand when the banks had their troubles 10 years ago, so I had to rethink my spending and I'm doing OK.

Grannytotwins. Have you thought about equity release? This allows you to remain in your house by cashing-in on some of the value. A sort of reversed mortgage.
Not something to dash into, and best to investigate and take some advice on, but it would provide you with some extra cash. My children keep urging me to do it, saying that I should get the benefit of all the years we spent, paying for our home. They insist that they aren't bothered about it being left to them in my will. I haven't taken the plunge yet. My late husband had only his State pension. When he died I lost that, and his attendance allowance' My son lives with me, at the moment, so I can't claim anything extra, but he pays his share. If he moves out I will have to re-think my finances.
It is difficult when a partner dies, especially if they always dealt with the family finances. Luckily we shared that job, so I wasn't left floundering, as many wives are.

So sorry to hear about the situation you are in OP.
Just in case it is of any help I found that having all accounts in joint names made things so much easier when my husband died. Financial life went on as normal.
I have known wives who could not access any money whatsoever which made a terrible time even worse.
Thinking about you

AlgieswifeVal
It’s so tough to do, but make sure you have access to money or transfer money across to your account. You will need this.Secondly, when the sad time comes, buy many more copies of the death certificate than you think. Maybe ten.
Be very kind to yourself. You have had some great advice from Gransnet. If you have time, put as much in place as possible, you will be so glad you did. Be brave as decisions have to be made.

When my husband died, I was worried sick as we still had a mortgage to pay of.

However, I was entitled to a funeral fund and also there are other benefits you will probably be entitled to.
At the time I was working but my husband didn’t have a private pension. I was just coming up for retirement after his death. When all the monies had been sorted out and the relevant benefits paid, I found I could manage ok.
But it all takes time so do find out what you are entitled to.

Do you have family who could help you with this. My son was very helpful at the time and helped me fill in forms etc.

It will get better.

AlgieswifeVal So sorry for the situation you and your DH are in, just make the most of every day.
So much good advice on here too.

Very sorry you find yourself in this distressing situation. Talking money can be difficult, as you don’t wish to appear insensitive, but you do need to know. As others have said, anything that is solely in your husband’s name is well worth putting into joint names now, including utilities etc. Luckily, my father did this not long before he died, quite unexpectedly, and although my mother was completely unused to dealing with finances, the fact that she had access to all the accounts and could deal with insurance etc made it so much easier for us to help her.

So sorry for your situation. When my DH passed away eight years ago I received a lump sum in a chequet from a past employer. It was very welcome I can tell you, but given the choice I'd rather have my DH back safe and well without that wretched illness. I also get a small pension (50% of his works pension - he'd paid in AVCs)) straight into the bank at the end of each month.
For one year I received some sort of widowed person's allowance, the purpose of which is to help make the transition between either two wages or one wage and one sick pay?JSA. There is a short fall which I make up for with savings - not very satisfactory, but I manage by being frugal. A lump sum from downsizing helps and I'll also get another lump sum when late MIL's house sale goes through. I may get a little PT job if necessary.
Be careful at the bank, take a friend who knows about their wily tricks. An adviser persuaded me to take out guess what - PPI! After a while I got wise and my BIL advised me to write to them to get this back - naughty things. Under the guise of 'helping me' they were really helping themselves. Best wishes.

This is such a sad thread, but which such useful advice. I am so sorry to hear of all these losses.
The important advice must be life assurance is so crucial to cover the outstanding mortgage, and that younger women must prepare for this eventuality as soon as they start work. I know that many gransnetters were not able to join occupational pensions, but we must encourage our daughters to be more savvy.

I am sorry for what you are going through and I hope you take the advice given on GN. One thing DO NOT cut down on heating when Winter comes around again you must keep warm no matter what the cost. Sending hugs to you

Sorry to hear about your husband.

My husband died recently. He didn't have a private pension, only the state one. I am now trying to downsize and am living off my pesnion and savings. It has not been, and is not easy. It's all come as a bit of a shock as I've never had to deal with finances but am learning fast and trying to save where I can. We have already taken equity out of the house and don't want to take any more. The house was the nest egg and if I sell at a reasonable price, I'll be ok. Meanwhile, the savings are going down.

Make sure that all accounts are on joint names. Access to funds is most important.

I’m so sad for you both. Sending a virtual hug.
I’ve been a widow for 16 years, with no family to help. It is hard but take all the advice you can get, from as many agencies and people who offer it, but beware of any that want to charge you.
Do an audit of every bill you pay. Make sure they are in joint names and on the cheapest deal. Look at household outgoings. Can you tweak them by choosing where you shop and what for? Be aware of Freecycle and Freegle and other sites. Not everything needs to be new.
Mostly though, spend time with your DH. Laughter together if you can, and make memories. Scary as it is, the future will be ok. You are not alone, although it feels so hard. Keep busy is my very best advice.

So sorry to hear your news....
Have either of you been in touch with any pension provider you may have and signed the declaration that enables the surviving partner to receive a proportion of that provision?
Again... So sorry.

Age UK produce a useful free booklet called the Lifebook in which you can put all the useful information that Lindylou spoke of eg bank details, passwords etc. Here's the link:
www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/care/home-safety/lifebook/

When a colleague of my late DH husband passed away
his wife was surprised what she was entitled to in the way of finance. When my DH passed away I wondered how I would manage.My own income at that time was a state pension. I had received this on reaching 60.No way would I have been able to exist on that. I recall DH always very careful and on the ball when it came to money once saying ' jokingly'? when I had a moan about the cost of this and that 'don't worry you will be better off when I am dead. I did not know he had not one but two private pensions from two jobs he had through out the years. I did not know how much a widows pension would give me. Let's just say his words to an extent came true .Now only myself, on DH passing, my monthly income and with a reduction in my council tax although not in total allowing me exotic holidays, or designer clothes, keeps me happy.

Pen50.My bank manager was very helpful and no charge so I did not need an expensive accountant /financial adviser to put me on the right path in how to invest what I could spare from what money I had coming in. It is this what helps pay towards gas, electric, water. Things we cannot do without and take for granted when one has a husband/partner to pay the bills.

Sorry to read of your worry of your poorly husband and stress over lack of money. A friend of mine lost her husband she downsized and moved into a caravan on an holiday park it’s open 11.5 months of the year so she stays at her son’s house for those two weeks. She is very happy that she done so and has money in the bank from the sale of the house. She pays £510 per month that includes ground rent insurance gas and electric.

Lots on here seem to have private pensions..unfortunatley my DH didnt. He was on state pension (he was 20 yrs older than me) also topped up with Pension credit.

The night he died his pension ceased there and then.I became a single person overnight.

We had no savings nothing.

I did get the £2,000 bereavement allowance which helped towards the funeral

Al I can say is try and claim for anything even if you are not sure you are entitled to it..they can only say no.

So sorry to hear of your husband's grave illness.

Apart from all the sensible suggestions already mentioned, I would advise you to speak to your bank. I do not know what their policy is likely to be regarding a bank account that is in your husband's name, as I don't live in the UK, but here it would be closed until the estate is wound up. A joint account, if you have one you will be able to access, but ask your bank about funeral expenses and whether they may be paid from an account in your husband's name.

Do you have a power of attorney so you may act on your husband's behalf? If not, perhaps you should consider it, if he is able and willing to sign it.

The pension scheme your husband's pension is paid from, should be able to help you regarding your entitlement.

Please do try to find the answers now, as others have said, you do not need financial worries keeping you awake at this very sad time, where I am sure you want to be with your DH as much as possible.

I hope you have joint bank accounts, if not that needs to be changed urgently, any accounts in your husbands name will be frozen.
If your husband has made a will there should be an executor for his estate, it might be a family member, a friend, a solicitor or a bank. They will all help you with any formalities, the professionals will charge fees, others can claim expenses. If there is no will it can cause serious problems, see a solicitor it may still be possible.
Pensions will depend on the terms of the agreement.

Gathering all the information now will help put your mind at rest.

newnanny. Not a good idea to leave a post it note on computer with passwords! What if you had a burglary? They could transfer all your money into their accounts.