One week

So sorry for your loss..?..but whatever you do don’t give up your dogs ..hugs xx

So sorry to hear of your loss. People are so insensitive, why would you get rid of your beloved pets too and make the grief and loss worse.
I have found that homeopathic remedies which are gentle and can be taken as well as conventional drugs with no problems considerably help with loss and grief.
Rescue Remedy (a mix of Bach flower essences) which you can buy freely is a good help too.

Oh dear - such a tough, and bewildering, time for you. Sending you (and your dogs) love and hugs.

So sorry for your loss. You are right to keep the dogs. Caring for them is a help to you in these dreadful days and will be for a very long time, I hope.

Please do not make any major decisions yet. Give yourself time to mourn your husband and let all decisions about your future wait until you feel able to cope again.

Where you are now is where I was five years ago, and it's hell. Losing a partner is like emotional amputation without any anaesthetic. Grief never really goes away - you just build scar tissue around it. Your dogs will be of enormous help - hang on to them. Warm hugs and deepest sympathy.

I don’t think I can add anything to the comments already made by others but wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. People don’t always think things through before they speak even with the best of intentions. From experience after the death of my DH, having to get up every day to walk our dog gave me a reason to get out of bed and get dressed on days when I wouldn’t otherwise have done. So enjoy your dogs and the comfort they will bring

A lot of very good advice here. From my own experience I would say don't do anything big for a year, so that you can learn to cope on your own. There is so much that has to be done whilst still in an emotional state - paying bills, managing the house etc. You don't forget (how could you?). You just learn to live with it and, as someone said, a scar grows over.

So sorry for your loss .Your dogs will spur you on and get you out the house, i suffer from agrophobia after losing my mum and dad i left my job and locked myself away, my life is a mess, grieve however you need too and get out in the fresh air with the dogs sending you big hugs and lots of love

It must be tough for you - we all dread it. But if the dogs are keeping you going and giving you their unconditional love, they seem essential to me.

I can't say anything to help, of course, but I just wanted to post to offer my sympathies. I haven't lost a partner yet (other than to divorce) so I can't imagine the full extent of how you must be feeling, but I wish you strength and peace of mind.

So , so sorry for your loss. It's still hard even when it is expected. We just have to accept and learn to live our new life, No one understands better than those who have been there.

Just take small steps , an hour at a time, a day at a time. It takes time for you to return to 'normal' whatever normal is. It will be your life as you choose.

If you have been caring for your husband you don't realise what it has taken out of you.

I know I have written this before but a friend who had been a widow for eight years gave me some very good advice. Don't take tablets- you still have to face it. Don't drink at home alone it can become addictive, Always cook you must look after yourself. Don't make any major decisions for at least two years. Accept all invitations (people give up asking if you keep refusing.)

There's no denying it is a rocky road but it does get easier along the way as we come to terms with the fact that it is your life now.

Big hug. take care x

So sorry to hear of your loss, keep your dogs they will be a comfort in the days to come. Don’t decide anything yet, take your time and be kind to yourself. ?

Bumblebee said everything I wanted to so perfectly. I send you so much love.

A day at a time....you will have been through so much I am sure....take all the support and comfort that you need, wherever that comes from (dogs and all) ...and stay away from any of that, that doesn’t help you, no matter how well meaning. Don’t expect to feel great any time soon. It’s a long journey so baby steps...and be kind to yourself.?

Just be gentle with yourself! It's an enormous change in your life. As for comments about your dogs, it might help to have a response ready...just saying you're coping with them fine. (And IF you would like help at any point friends would I'm sure,or there are dog walkers etc or Borrow My Doggy)

I have just seen this post as I’ve just popped onto Gransnet for a little look before I go out. I apologise in advance if I am repeating much of what others have said - but this has really touched me. I am SO sorry to hear of your loss and nothing anyone can say right now will take away that raw ache. But ... please don’t let anyone persuade you to part with your dogs! Well meaning folk will say ‘you can’t cope’ with them - but I assure you, you will find a way - and as you say - they are now your reason to keep on going each day. Dogs give so so much, unconditionally, and you love them. If times are tricky, there are plenty of dog walkers around who will help you. Very much love to you and your lovely - and loving dogs.

What a great loss. A week is a very short time to be making any decisions, and I’m sure you will know when is the right time to make changes. I remember when I lost my husband, my dear dog was such a comfort and dried many of my tears. Animals are so good at picking up moods, and you can talk to them without getting any answers or comments back. Take time to grieve.

His soul flies free xxx One day at a time. The dogs will help you through this.... I don't think people were meaning to be hurtful. They were just thinking of you so don't be too hard on them. Virtual hugs being sent.

First of all, let me express my sorrow for your loss. The only explanation I can think of for the people who give us their "advice" when we are in such pain is that they have not been in our place and don't really understand what grieving people feel. I lost a child almost 40 years ago and I still feel the pangs from what some people said. The good news is, the losses in our lives and the resulting pain, makes us more compassionate to others. Hopefully, when it is our turn to comfort someone, we can learn from other's mistakes and be more loving and caring. God bless you and may your dogs love you and help you in your healing.

Sorry for your loss. There will be difficult days ahead but your dogs will be with you giving unconditional love and support. Be kind to yourself and don't let well meaning family and friends push you to make decisions before you are ready.

I’m so very sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you and other Gransnetters who have had to cope with the loss of a partner.

Wishing you comfort and peace after your sad bereavement.
I’m glad you have your dogs at this time when you need to be surrounded by love.
It’s a long journey through grief, but there will be sunshine at the end.

So sorry for the loss of your dear husband...it is always a shock no matter how long you have been together...and as others have said, don't take any notice of the people telling you what you should be doing with your dogs.. they obviously have no understanding of the comfort that dogs can bring and probably don't even have dogs themselves.
I remember years ago when we lost one of our precious dogs, my SIL phoning and instructing...yes instructing.. my husband to pack all the dog's things up...bed, toys, blankets, bowls, lead and collar, etc. etc., and get rid of it all as "it will only remind you of him all the time"... I was furious and it took all my strength not to tell her what I thought. Needless to say we ignored her and I still have reminders of him to this day.
People don't always know what is best for us even if they think they do, so you keep your beloved dogs..they need you as much as you will need them in the coming weeks..and they will be another lovely link to your dear husband too. X

'Goodbye' is sometimes the hardest word when you've shared a lifetime but he left you with memories which will never dim.
We are thinking of you and we're here as unseen friends to support you through the days, weeks, months and years ahead.
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So very sorry for your loss, notoveryet. I hope you keep your dogs who give you unconditional love, comfort and purpose in life.