It has been three months now since the love of my life passed away. We had planned for my demise with my cancer, but I never for a moment thought he would go before me. I have made up a room where I go every day and sit with photos of him and I burn candles and have the TV going in the background and play cards on the laptop. I do my chores and only eat when I’m hungry. I have minimal contact with our 2 children, we never saw them much before as they were always busy with their lives and even less of the grandchildren and they have only phoned twice each since and that was ages ago. They never came to see us when we were both in hospital over recent years. The trouble is I just don’t want to do anything or have contact with people. I have one brother who has been wonderful and I’ve been out to stay (4 hours away) with his family two times and he included me on his recent week long holiday which was a diversion for me but I don’t want to be a burden to them with my misery. I am getting grief counselling but I’m thinking of stopping this as it does not help much. I have ceased all my medical treatment and just wish to be with my DH but it’s not happening quick enough for me. I’ve been reading books on the “afterlife” but who really knows if there is anything after death? I just miss him so. Thank you for listening.
