Watching bereaved daughter and grandchildren in so much pain hurts somuch

I’m so sorry for what your family is going through. I do not think you sound selfish at all at this stage.

Keep providing your daughter emotional and practical help. More freezer food is always welcome in my experience

So sorry for you all. Is there anything worse than seeing your daughter and grandchildren in pain. You being there and offering any support they need will make all the difference,

Buddleja My Sil could not get through on the phone

Buddleja when my son was killed Cruse advised me to wait 6 months before starting bereavement therapy with them. Apparently this is quite usual. You get six sessions, which can be extended to 12 if the counsellor feels that six is not enough. In the end I had 28. My counsellor was wonderful, and I will be eternally grateful for her gentle, empathetic support.

BlueBelle

Cambsnan I totally understand your pain One of my son in laws died when my grandkids were 4 and 6 It was very very hard for my daughter but they are now 22 and 24 and very very successful They have recently both run a marathon and a ultra marathon raising money for cancer charities in their Dads name ❤️

How dreadful for your family, BlueBelle. I am so sorry. From what you have said, he would be very proud of his girls, and of his wife who brought them up alone.
As a Mum and Nana, you feel so helpless when things go wrong, don’t you? But all you

Cont’d….
All you can do is be there for them. 💐

we had that last year when my d-i-l took her own life with tablets, granddaughter age 10 came home to find her on the loo dead, got her big sister 13, 2 sons age 13 & 12 to ring an ambulance and go down the road to a neighbour who is a paramedic they rang 999 & my son who was 1hr drive away at work. all the medics confirmed that there was no sign of life so the air ambulance was sent away & police stayed till my son got home. We were all devastated, my daughter 25 & I went up & stayed a week or so. All you can do is unswer the questions honestly and try & make sense of it in your own mind, without putting blame on the deceased or anyone still loving. the verdict was suicide, but I think it could be an accident as she had strong painkillers for back pain. In the end no-one knows & each will make up their own mind. Just keep reassuring them it wasn't their fault & speak of the deceased in loving terms. Time does ease, and they will learn to adjust

Cambsnan, their father woukd be very proud of his children and his wife too for raising them.