Sometimes it’s just the small things that press the bruise isn’t it? 😢

PS. I never wrote another Christmas card after DH died. Just couldn’t bring myself to sign it without his name.😭

Yes, missing the little things is so hard and you can feel so alone when it hits you.😞

It’s coming up to DH’s 11th anniversary (how can it be so long in some ways but only a moment ago in others?).

I’ve found the last few weeks difficult as my mind goes back to his final few weeks and how sad he was when he realised his time was running out. “I thought I had five years” he said to me. Breaks my heart all over again when I remember.💔

You’re doing so well, FGT but it’s inevitable that the tears will still fall and it’s good to share your sadness and not bottle it up.

As Shakespeare so aptly put it ‘Give sorrow words, the grief that dare not speak knits up the o’erwrought heart and bids it break’💐

I have no idea how you feel, all I can do is send you love and hugs, all of you who’ve suffered such a massive loss xx

PS warning to FGT and SueDonim - writing birthday cards and later in the year, Christmas cards on your own - be prepared.

I think it’s the little things too.
Realising that Paw had actually quietly stashed away some pension provision for me without telling me - because of over 10 years of ill health and hospital admissions he had not been able to continue with his career I was used to lurching from overdraft to overdraft and when he died I did not even know how I was going to afford his funeral.
That made me cry.
Seeing his handwriting on a random note -😢😢😢- but worst of all was a tiny DVD clip of us arriving at my aunt and uncle’s Ruby wedding do- somebody must have asked Paw how he was and hearing his standard reply “ Not too bad thank you” dissolved me.
But these would not hurt if they had not triggered happy memories.
“Do not weep because he is no more, but be glad because he was.”

I hear you, FGT. . I wrote a birthday card for someone today. My name on its own looked so lonely on the page.

I also looked for a birthday card for my dd, later this month. I saw one with ‘To Our Daughter’ on the front and it almost undid me. 😰

FGT2 such a sad post. Take care.

I'm not a widow myself, but I just wanted to say to be kind to yourself - it is still early days, and grief is not a linear thing. Sometimes it just creeps up and smacks you right in the face when you least expect it. And yes, it's often those little things which hurt the most - the things which we do tend to take for granted.

Sending you a hug as well.

Your post brought tears to my eyes, FGT.
It must be so hard, missing all those little things we take for granted.

💐

It's very early days, FGT. You are probably still waking up expecting to see your DH beside you. Hopefully, time will help, but mourning is the price we pay for love, it is said, so I hope that you can be glad of the love that you shared.
Best wishes.

I'm so sorry FGT you evoke that devastating loss in all its rawness. I hope writing about it proves carthatic in some sort of way.

So very sorry for your loss. xx

If knowing how much we care about what you are going through is of any use at all, then be reassured that we do. There is nothing that can relieve your pain, but there are those on here who are going through the same anguish. 💐

FGT I am sending you a hug

For me it was similar, it hit me the very next day when I woke early and the dishes were not put away.

Realisation kicked in, no-one but me to make myself a cup of tea, to take me out hand in hand and no goodbye. It happened so suddenly, we kissed, he went out for a cycle ride and his heart failed going up a hill. A policeman came to tell me and took me to the hospital, he was taken there by air ambulance, we were too late. I was in shock then reality hit me good and hard

I know how you feel FGT I really do

Thank you so much your kindness is touching. x

Any other widows out there who feel similar ‘pinches’? We can share. I never knew how devastating this would be. Not really.
The loss of a life partner is different to any other bereavement I have endured.

I have also lost my confidence a bit.

I'm so sorry, sending kindest thoughts to you

So sorry 🥲

I’m so sorry 😥 There arnt words enough to express how I feel for your pain.

Sending you a very big (((hug))) 😘