Gransnet forums

Bereavement

Newly widowed

(108 Posts)
HelterSkelter1 Tue 18-Aug-26 07:07:56

My dear DH died 6 days ago after a long illness. I know from reading these threads over the past 2 years that I have a long journey ahead.

His death was not unexpected, but was still a great shock. He died at home so my feet take me into his room and I expect to see him there.

He was so unwell and the last days in pain so for him it was a release and for us a relief. So final and so hard.

AGAA4 Tue 18-Aug-26 17:04:47

So sorry for your loss HelterSkelter.
Many of us have been where you are now. Look after yourself πŸ’

Georgesgran Tue 18-Aug-26 17:29:33

πŸ’ Sorry for your loss HelterSkelter

appletree21 Tue 18-Aug-26 17:37:30

Thinking of you Helterskelter and sending you hugs xxxxx . Each day will get a little easier but it takes a long time to accept and adjust..πŸ€—

MollyNew Tue 18-Aug-26 19:18:15

My condolences HelterSkelter flowers

Nell82 Tue 18-Aug-26 19:53:29

I'm so sorry HelterSkelter

hollysteers Tue 18-Aug-26 20:17:56

Wishing you strength in the coming days HelterSkelter

Cressy Tue 18-Aug-26 21:03:39

Although expected, it will still be hard to believe. Acceptance will come with time but in the meantime be very gentle and compassionate to yourself. So sorry Helterskelter xx

Catterygirl Tue 18-Aug-26 23:29:27

My condolences.

lovethepuppies Tue 18-Aug-26 23:31:19

I'm so sorry. flowers

labazs Wed 19-Aug-26 13:43:48

sending much love and hugs. i am sure you have many happy memories which i hope will bring you comfort

Romola Wed 19-Aug-26 13:47:30

There is an army of us widows here who are with you on this journey.
They continue to be helpful to me.
I send condolences and hopes for strength in your grief.

Lallylou Wed 19-Aug-26 13:55:36

Dear Helter-skelter,
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine all your pain.
Lots of practical help from the crowd at Gran's bet.

Oreo Wed 19-Aug-26 14:18:41

madeleine45

My sincere condolences to you HelterSkelter. I will be thinking of you and hoping that family and friends are surrounding you with their love. You have loved and cared for him and been there for him all this time, and that makes it so much harder in the beginning, when your days revolved round his needs. Know that your friends on GN are always here for you whatever time of day or night you might need someone around.

A nice message and I completely agree
HelterSkelter take care of yourself πŸ’

Lindylou23 Wed 19-Aug-26 14:19:08

My condolences and a warm hug to you. I lost my DH 3 years ago after 50 years together, take it hour at a time, sometimes it is 5 minutes at a time. Take any help that is offered. Take care

Juicylucy Wed 19-Aug-26 14:31:01

Sending hugs. Please keep coming on here to chat no matter what time of day or night someone will be here. πŸ’—

MT62 Wed 19-Aug-26 14:35:54

My condolences HS. Very sad to hear that πŸ«‚

Tessa1234 Wed 19-Aug-26 14:39:11

So sorry for your loss πŸ’

Harris27 Wed 19-Aug-26 14:42:46

My sincere condolences to you. Take care of yourself and any help offered take it. πŸ’

Applegran Wed 19-Aug-26 14:48:26

I am sending you a loving hug. As you already know, grief is a journey - so maybe you can come back as time goes by and share how you are. There are many people here with kindness and understanding.

knspol Wed 19-Aug-26 15:08:21

Thinking of you at this dreadful time. Words can't explain what this feels like but there are plenty of people on here who have been through the same thing so please feel free to post anything and everything whenever or if ever you feel like doing so.
I found the only people with any real understanding of how difficult this may be for you are those of us who have been through it ourselves.

4allweknow Wed 19-Aug-26 15:08:52

Lost DH 4 years ago and still have the "empty/missing" type of experience.Bereavement is different for all. You have to realise what you are going through is a massive loss of part of your life. Be kind and allow yourself to have those feelings.
My Sincere Condolences.

monami Wed 19-Aug-26 15:49:09

there is nothing like it, no one can even imagine how you feel, i have been through it 3 years ago, and even though you carry on you never ever get over it, i still expect my husband to come home, i am happy enough now but miss him each day, the sheer utter lonliness is unbearable at times, but it wil get easier as i said, take care x

AuntieE Wed 19-Aug-26 16:12:39

My sincere condolonces.

I found it helped me through those first dreadful days to know that my husband was finally at peace, so I hope you will find consolation in a similar thought.

Stay in touch, as Romola, we are a great number of widows here, and some widowers too, so one or other of us at least will know how you feel at any given moment.

ReturningFromExile Wed 19-Aug-26 16:15:39

flowers condolences at this very sad time.

SueDonim Wed 19-Aug-26 16:21:22

Lindylou23

My condolences and a warm hug to you. I lost my DH 3 years ago after 50 years together, take it hour at a time, sometimes it is 5 minutes at a time. Take any help that is offered. Take care

That made me cry, LindyLou. Lovely words. flowers