Silverline

I would hate to downplay telephone calls, having been involved with the Samaritans in its early days, apart from giving human contact the callers would be in a good position to alert other services (if they exist!)

However, I totally agree with Iam64 as our faculties deteriorate we need real one to one human contact.

My 92 year old neighbour is fiercely independent, but has no family nearby, she has several times been involved in scams, although even she smelled a rat when someone posing as a water board official told her that her next door neighbour was building a swimming pool and could he check her water supply.

She does need support, but she will be much happier if that support can be given in her own home where she still has local friends.

Iam64 If they are the same people who have been manning Age Scotland telephones doing the same thing, they will have had the proper checks and have to use passwords and keep records of their calls. There will be records of which people are on whose list. New recruits will get the same checks.

heard about this on channel 5 this evening and the most telling thing ER said was that while most 'elderly' people have friends, acquaintances and extended family to do 'things with' they often do not have anyone to do 'nothing with', which I think sums up most of the feelings of those of us who live alone.
Our families, friends are there when there is something to take part in (but as we all know we let our families live their own lives and we don't want to be a burden and are fiercely independent etc) but it is hard to return to an empty house and have no-one to unwind from the day with.
and it is not just the older generation who can feel this way.
and this is probably why lots of us have dog(s) to fill a bit of the void.

was on North West news tonight

My local Age Uk has run a telephone befriending service for nearly 20 years. Older people are rung regularly once a week by the same person, usually of a similar age.

I think many Age UK branches also do the same thing.

I believe, like Iam64 that reducing services is one of the problems. In addition, although it might seem strange, the closing of public toilets is also an issue for older people [as well as for others of course] because as we get older many of us lose bladder - and bowel - elasticity and can't hold on for any length of time [not that we should as that is a health hazard in itself]. This fear of wetting or soiling ourselves means that many people prefer to remain indoors to avoid the threat of any embarrassment and of course this has a knock on effect with regard to mental health and loneliness. And talking toilets remains a taboo subject for many older people.

Goldengirl Sooo agree,

I live in a tourist area where the only public toilets are down a steep flight of stairs and I think close at night. we get lots of elderly tourists and coaches, don't the local council want people to visit!

Lack of loos is also a big problem for the disabled as I know from my own family. I spoke to a lady in a wheelchair on a train some years ago, she told me that she hated New Street station in Birmingham as there were no toilets on the platforms if she needed to change trains, it would be the same for elderly passengers. Hope that changed when the station was modernised.

Elegran, my concerns aren't so much about the approved volunteers on the phone line, more about the fact any one can phone an elderly person, and pretend to be anyone.
Isolation, or feeling lonely despite have good support from family and friends often goes hand in hand with the process of ageing. My mother's confidence deteriorated hugely in a very short period of time, along with her eye sight and hearing sadly. My mum in law in 93 and still lives independently, but is vulnerable on the phone in a way she never has been previously. I don't want to just knock an idea that may help some people, but I do wonder if any positives may be outweighed by potential pitfalls. Life is full of pitfalls though isn't it and it shouldn't stop us trying new things. I do hope part of my reservation isn't down to my distaste of Esther's comments about Jimmy Saville's behaviour being an open secret once the horror was finally made public.

If someone rings Silverline, or Age Uk for that matter, and makes contact, I am sure they will have the systems to make sure that the system is not open to abuse. Why would anyone know that someone had a Silverline befriender unless the recipient told them?

How very sad it is that an idea aimed at helping people immediately rings alarm bells about exploiters. It just makes me shiver. What a sad old world we live in now.

I think that the service cold have a part to play, as long as there are proper safeguards. Some old people do not like to invite people into their house because they know it is a bit of a mess/ haven't the energy to play the host (ess) etc and a phone call might feel better for them.

Presumably there would be some sort of password and the "phoner" would not know the address of the "phonee."

I think it is a good idea, but my only concern is the propensity of frail elderly people to feel they have to rush to get to the phone before it rings off and risk falling.

It is probably a good idea for people who are alone , or have no-one !!

As long as proper safeguards are put in place which I am sure they will be !!

My point is that anyone can phone an individual and claim to be from Silverline. Isolated older people may not be aware of the need for a password. I have a positive approach to life, but that doesn't rule out the need to be aware that there are exploiters just waiting for another opportunity exploit.

True, but it is no different to people claiming to be from the Social Services or any other organisation so as to take advantage of lonely individuals. There is not an extra layer of danger to it, and the publicity which goes with Silverline will doubtless include warnings about fraud.

I think it is a great idea, set up for all the best of intentions and I wish them all well and hope it becomes a great success.

There is danger in anything if you look for it but should that stop what is intended to be a lifeline for so many unfortunate, lonely people?

some people have no family at all,and very few friends,especially if like us are housebound.
take care princess47 x

Hello princess47 hope you stick around as GN has lots to offer.

There is a (slightly) more recent thread on tis topic which I think TAB12 started which might interest you princess47