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Withany's bridge

(202 Posts)
withany Fri 03-Jan-14 00:10:17

Hi, some of you already know of my DH and what he has done to me and our family, so after surviving Christmas with the help of you lot, the New Year's Party, that I don't remember how I got home from,confused i am back here to let you know that my little saying of 'Cry a river, build a bridge, walk over the bridge to a new life' is being put into operation I have bought a hard hat and my bridge is under constructionsmile
Gave my DH and floosie a shock this morning, we bank online,but this morning I could not log in, after having my card cloned last year, my first thought was either DH had changed bank long in details or my computer had been hacked. I emailed DH and said what had happened and he had 30 mins to tell me if it was him or I was going to cancel all bank cards. Well he didn't email, so I rang her house in #America and when she answered I asked to speak to my DH please, she made some sort of response so I repeated the request and then DH came on the line, said he knew nothing about changing the bank, don't cancel his card, he would try and log on from there and see if he could find a problem. He then sent me a mail in seconds saying don't cancel my card I shall be stuck here and not able to get home!
Well GN's I think he thought I had come down with the last lot of rain, I responded with You have a return ticket and a girl friend to lend you the money, you can get home.
He then rang me and said he could get into the accounts, would I try again and let him know what had happened. I spoke to bank, they checked system had no idea why system had locked me out, but everything was o.k. I let DH sweat a bit and then emailed and said bank o.k., solicitor stuff ready for when you return.
I think it must have been a shock to answer the phone and I am on the other end, I do hope sogrin it has put a smile on my face several times today. The fact that I was shaking when I phoned, and I have been a bit wobbly since speaking to him, well I expect thats normal. But I am counting what I did as the first part of the foundation for my bridge. I may have to dig a bit deeper or even start again, but my bridge is on the way, there has been no crying today. flowers take care everyone thank you so much for your support.

Dragonfly1 Mon 10-Feb-14 20:16:49

grin!

Ana Mon 10-Feb-14 20:21:17

People 'disappear' for all sorts of reasons. Don't worry about it!

Dragonfly1 Mon 10-Feb-14 20:49:54

More nosey than worried, to be honest.

redeagle777 Fri 21-Feb-14 14:15:14

Message deleted by Gransnet for breaking our forum guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Soutra Fri 28-Feb-14 14:58:52

Less than week until Withany's DH is due back from the U.S.
I wonder if we'll hear any more of this saga?

glammanana Fri 28-Feb-14 15:09:27

Soutra grin

cazthebookworm Sat 01-Mar-14 10:11:21

hmm

seaspirit Sat 01-Mar-14 13:15:25

keep building that bridge girl, and get yourself as safe as possible, he will need a court order to get you out of there as I understand it

jinglbellsfrocks Sat 01-Mar-14 13:23:18

Oh leave it! Withany herself hasn't been back on. This is silly.

annodomini Sat 01-Mar-14 13:26:37

I agree, with you grin jingl.

ps Sat 01-Mar-14 13:28:12

Like others I have had a quick look to see if withany has any further news on her horrendous situation. I may be writing out of turn here but I would suspect her dissapearance may have a little to do with some of the offhand and flippant comments, intended or not, which may have added nothing but further torment to what must be a terrible burden for her to be carrying and something she may be struggling to understand or come to terms with.
I'm pretty certain some of you ladies have been a great support for her at her time of need but to be perfectly honest I did raise an eyebrow or two at some of the comments. I hope that is not the case and that the lady does have a look and let those of us who do care know that all is well or otherwise as the case may be.
withany if that is the case please let us know how things are, you do not need to dignify any response you are not comfortable with by responding to them but letting the rest of us know you are ok would be nice. If I have the total wrong end of the stick I do apologise but my perception is as it is.

Dragonfly1 Sat 01-Mar-14 14:26:20

PS - You could try sending her a PM if you're concerned, maybe?

withany Sat 01-Mar-14 22:07:13

Thank you PS, you are very kind. Yes I am still here, still holding on and will continue to do so. I have built my bridge, crossed it and I am starting to put my life back together.

NfkDumpling Sat 01-Mar-14 22:10:22

Brilliant! So glad you're ok. I was wondering too. Hope to see you on other threads?

ps Sun 02-Mar-14 09:14:12

withany so pleased to hear you are ok. As seaspirit has said - keep yourself safe, and strong. Very best wishes.

bikergran Sun 02-Mar-14 20:25:48

good luck withany smile

Granny23 Sun 02-Mar-14 22:52:55

I'm another one who is very pleased to here from you Withany. I am glad (but not surprised given your determination and sense of humour), to hear that you are getting on with life and send best wishes flowers.

Lona Mon 03-Mar-14 09:37:17

Stay strong Withany, we are still rooting for you flowers

Charleygirl Mon 03-Mar-14 11:26:54

I agree 100% with Granny23 and Lona flowers

withany Mon 03-Mar-14 20:18:36

Thank you all for your good wishes.
DH is back...very belligerent, making all sorts of threats as far as I'm concerned he can scream and shout as much as he likes, I am happy with the barriers I have in place.
I know what his options are, he really isn't a happy bunny. He is still under the impression that I want to leave here asap, and that my social life is non existent just out one afternoon a week.
Well how wrong he is, I have started going to a sort of lunch club, it is not just for the over 60s. The organiser, is only the vicar I asked if he was going to feed the 5,000 many weeks ago, It was a real surpise but nice he remembered me. I am back swimming, do a gentle exercise class, and ball room dancing.
So I now have 5 things I go to plus I have managed to be accepted for an Open University course which started 1st March. I have made a few new friends, that I go out with. I am planning a holiday September time and found someone to go with (female)
I find I can just about manage on pension credit
I am feeling strong, confident and have no intention of moving until I am ready. I really feel I am making headway.
No doubt he has his own agenda, but I will not be manipulated and controlled by him anymore.
I have a feeling I will still have a use for the hard hat. The saddest thing in all this is that DH now threatens to stop paying for his dogs medication and her pet insurance.
Once again thank you for your kind wishes.

NfkDumpling Mon 03-Mar-14 20:28:33

Oh, how sad - he's trying to use the dog as emotional blackmail. It sounds as if you've moved on but maybe he hasn't?

Agus Mon 03-Mar-14 21:24:43

Pleased to hear from you again withany and the fact that you are getting on with your life, keeping busy and enjoying yourself. Sounds very positive.

Sounds as if your DH is now realising he can't have his cake and eat it.

Mishap Mon 03-Mar-14 22:06:24

This is all sounds positive. Well done.

Lona Mon 03-Mar-14 22:11:44

Well done Withany, sounds like you're off to a good start! sunshine

Soutra Mon 03-Mar-14 23:35:14

Knowing what OU degree courses cost, I should have thought the Pet Plan was the least of your worries.hmm