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Christmas Crackers

(88 Posts)
vampirequeen Mon 01-Dec-14 09:12:21

Yay!!!! December is here!!!!

I'll post a cracker of a joke here everyday to make you laugh/cringe grin

Here's today's:

What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?


rubysong Mon 01-Dec-14 18:28:26

DH suggests 'flue'!

jinglbellsfrocks Mon 01-Dec-14 18:57:13

do we have to?

janerowena Mon 01-Dec-14 19:00:11


I'd really like some recommendations for good but not too expensive crackers!

shysal Mon 01-Dec-14 19:10:32

janerowena, buy attractive but cheap crackers and then open them up to add your own extra gifts. Much easier than making your own, and includes hats and jokes.

Thanks for the promise of jokes, vampire, I look forward to a chuckle each

janerowena Mon 01-Dec-14 19:14:15

That's a good idea. I think I shall, they are such a let-down at times and Amazon and eBay have some good odds and ends.

jinglbellsfrocks Mon 01-Dec-14 19:23:09

Does anyone really pull crackers for the gift? confused

vampirequeen Mon 01-Dec-14 19:32:09

We're going to make our crackers with the children on Christmas Eve. There will be a chocolate Santa in each one just in case we don't have enough to eat grin The jokes will be written by ourselves so they will be exceedingly gringeworthy and in our son's case probably won't make sense as he hasn't cracked how jokes work yet grin

janerowena Mon 01-Dec-14 19:33:25

I would like the opportunity to be pleased at the gift, yes. I decided it was time for a change when I found the stash of uncollected cracker gifts in my sideboard the other day. I would like something in them that people want to keep.

jinglbellsfrocks Mon 01-Dec-14 19:40:20

But it's the bang. And the awful joke. Not to mention the hat! (why am I the only one to actually put it on my head? confused)

And they are very pretty.

vampirequeen Mon 01-Dec-14 19:45:37

I bought some snaps from ebay so we'll still get the bang.

jinglbellsfrocks Mon 01-Dec-14 19:48:10

Oh yes! Must have the bang. Making your own sounds great. smile

janerowena Mon 01-Dec-14 20:01:15

I do already still have a packet of snaps from somewhere. It's very disappointing when they don't work, so I bought them as sort of consolations!

rosequartz Mon 01-Dec-14 20:01:37

I used to love the crackers with the Wade Whimsies in them, I did manage to find some once when DC were young but I doubt that they still do them now.

Have given my Wade Whimsies to the DGC sad - they will probably not treasure them as much as I did.

rosequartz Mon 01-Dec-14 20:03:36

Oh Yes!! They still do them! Oh No - the price shock

Ana Mon 01-Dec-14 20:05:50

Have a look on ebay for the Wade Whimsy characters (much cheaper than the crackers!) and make your own. tchsmile

rosequartz Mon 01-Dec-14 20:08:53

I could do that, but the DGC seemed a bit underwhelmed when I gave them to them, and I daren't collect any more myself, DH would put me out into the garage, complete with Whimsies.

Ana Mon 01-Dec-14 20:12:21

Think mine would be the same. Whereas, if there were Wade Whimsy 'Frozen' characters...tchhmm

rosesarered Mon 01-Dec-14 21:30:10

Did you know that Santa was dyslexic? He keeps signing his letters 'from
Satan' ...... boom-boom! tchgrin

shysal Tue 02-Dec-14 08:47:07

perfume samples
This sort of thing makes a suitable cracker gift for adults (male options available). I have previously used finger torches, Lego mini figures, socks, pants, travel sized toiletries, lip balm, macaroon shaped candles, and hair accessories, to name but a few.

What did the guests sing at the snowman's party?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.

vampirequeen Tue 02-Dec-14 08:55:08

Rosesarered ....tchgrin

Why does Santa have three gardens?

So he can 'ho ho ho'!

Elegran Tue 02-Dec-14 09:37:08

How does Santa like his pizza? Deep and crisp and even.

Elizabeth1 Tue 02-Dec-14 18:18:09

Ha ha ha very funny I like it elegran

vampirequeen Tue 02-Dec-14 18:20:00


Kiora Tue 02-Dec-14 18:20:39

A grin from me