Is it OK to return gifts to Giver?

Families eh?

I am of the school where we accept gifts graciously and sort out in the background, by re gifting or returning to the store if possible.

Its something we are just teaching our little ones - we explain it that someone has spent time, trouble, money and love to buy you a gift, so say I hate it or similar would hurt their feelings. So we smile and say thank you and then we sort it out afterwards,

Might be old school but I think there's no need to hurt someone's feelings over a gift that is given with love.

No its not acceptable, it is extremely rude and ungrateful IMHO. Sometimes we just have to say what we think and no eggshell treading.

I have received some awful gifts in the past but have NEVER returned them to the giver - just said thank you and either re-gifted or, more likely, quietly binned them.

No, never ever return a gift , so hurtful ,it's saying thank you but I don't like/need/want it.

I'd never return a gift, no matter how unacceptable. Now that you can ask for a gift receipt in many stores, I usually get one when I am not sure of the tastes or size of the recipient.

It is bad manners and shows complete disregard for the gift givers feelings.

I agree that gifts that are given for a special occasion should be accepted graciously, and I would never hurt someone's feelings by returning a present.
But if someone tried to offload something into me that they no longer want themselves (e.g. 'This doesn't fit me any more but you might be able to get into it') I have no compunction about telling politely pointing out to them that I have no need or desire for the said item

No, it isn't OK to return a gift in that manner. I think your "mum of son" daughter must have other issues with her sister if she can be so insensitive.

Might be best to let them fight their own wars and keep out of it. What a pair of sillies!

It is very hurtful when people openly do not like the gift you have chosen. My sister was like this all her life - nothing whatever our parents or I gave her was right and she behaved as if she always gave the perfect gift - which of course she did not. It got to the stage where we just gave her the money so she could choose her own.
I have never returned a gift as others have said but either tucked it away or recycled it.

As the other posters have said,she should accept the gift graciously, then recycle quietly later. There's no point in hurting someone's feelings.

Thank you for your comments. I was beginning to doubt myself in modern manners, and glad that the general consensus is the same as it has always been. Thatbags - you are very perceptive, there is a lot of 'history/issues' between them, it is very difficult to step back but I am really going to try and let them get on with it. It's too stressful to be forever torn between them both. I love them both... but..... arghhhh!

It's been some years since I gave my daughter a present she didn't like. She would tell you there and then she didn't like it. Now I ask.
If she wasn't the spitting image of her father I would swear that I was given the wrong baby at the hospital

I have just asked my 30 year old DD and she in turn asked half a dozen friends the same age and they all said that it is not acceptable. So its not just us Gners who think no.

My local charity shop has benefited a few times. I agree with everybody else, it is not acceptable to say that one does not like the gift. Interesting that the younger generation also agree with us.

I can't believe how rude some people are. My aunt is the same. She refused a present from my mam on the grounds that she didn't like it. Mam said 'Fine. Don't expect me to change it for something else. You'll just have to do without a present this Christmas'.

If someone goes to the time, expense and effort to get you a gift then you accept it graciously even if it's the most hideous thing in the world.

The same goes if you go to someone's house to eat. Whatever they put on the table is eaten regardless of how much you hate it. I hate pork and tinned cream (not together btw lol) but when I was younger an elderly relative spent money she didn't have to buy it for me as a treat when I went for tea. I would never have told her because she was being nice. She also bought coffee because she knew that I didn't like tea. Unfortunately she chose Camp coffee which is the least coffee like concoction on the market. I never thought of turning it down. I brought my girls up the same way. If someone goes to the trouble of feeding you then you eat what they serve.

I agree about gifts, but there are limits where food is concerned. I could never eat a plate of tripe if it was placed in front of me, no matter how well-meaning the person who had prepared it was!

Depends how close you are. I have two sister with children and we've always done that due to duplicate gifts being given etc. No-one gets offended. We usually say to each other "let me know if needs changing" as Im not sure what they're into at the mo.

Never return gifts.....It's rude and disheartening.

Daisydoo just let them get on with it. I would also withdraw for a while from your rude daughter who thinks you are 'interfering' when you're trying to help. Let her stew in her own angst for a few weeks and leave it up to her to contact you.

I'd rather someone be honest. Especially close family, it's no big deal, I'd also rather exchange it for something they would want than have to never use or re-gift.

I still have a pair of Pyjamas that didn't suit GS at Christmas . I got him the ones he wanted next shopping trip , but keep forgetting to take back the rejects , can't see the problem with this

I think returning a present is OK if it was given with the suggestion that it might be the wrong size or perhaps toonold or too young for the recipient. Otherwise I keep it whatever. One or two hideous things from MiL were carefully preserved and brought out if she was visiting.

Agree that, unless a wrong size or duplicate, accept with courtesy and a smile! If gift was a duplicate/wrong size most sisters would talk about it like grown ups and organise an exchange.

If mother of boy is being deliberately awkward ...leave the sisters to it!

The only time it is not just acceptable, but good manners to return gifts is when a wedding is cancelled. Otherwise, it is extremely rude.