GNHQ please make it clear that these forums are public!

It is always possible to send a PM to someone you want to support. They only get your GN name on it, not your real name or email address, unless you choose to include that.

Yes, that's an option. I prefer to have a 'chat' though, by far, and about more than bland subjects..

I am currently going through something which I would have liked to have posted and received GNs advice and support. I won't do that now.

What a pity.
The site will end up with nothing more interesting in threads than 'what colour marigolds do you wear for washing up'

Yes we can pm, but personally I think it's better when there is a group chat, you read other peoples comments and respond, it can all help the person needing advice.

All that will left to contribute to are the most mundane: reinforcing some peoples idea that over 50 means nobody has anything of worth to say. Nobody has a sex life (or would like one!) Nobody feels jealous, or behaves childishly, or wonders if they're doing the right thing. Nobody ever fancies someone they shouldn't, or has too much to drink...

Definitely, a chat is better.

My adult children know I'm on GN but don't know my user name.
I don't think they look at GN but who knows what might pop up in front of them on FB or worse - I saw a Mumsnet thread featured on MSN today.

If I wanted to post something personal, I'd change details to disguise it but if that wasn't possible I'd have to abandon the idea.

Surely the answer to this 'pearl- clutching' reaction is to make sure you understand how the internet works, and don't unburdened yourself on a public forum. It's not rocket science. If I Google my user name on any of the forums I use, I 'find' myself, as I do when I do the same with my professional name as a blogger and features writer for online magazines. Anything I have written in the last 10 years is there to see.

I don't think one necessarily needs to be unburdening for info to be possibly recognisable. I certainly haven't: I'm not even a particular regular user, but nonetheless I think I could have given away a fair bit of info, as have lots of people.

I am sick and tired of people using the term pearl-clutching.

It is stupid, ridiculous, patronising and meaningless and used by anyone who thinks someone else's concerns are of little value or concern.

Agreed.

willsmadnan it may not be rocket science, but clearly many people do not/did not understand that what they post on here might be shared on another public forum, including notoveryet who posted yesterday at 11:47.

P.S. I don't own any pearls to clutch. I do sometime spin my pearl ring around when I am deep in thought.

Well said Jalima. It's a demeaning term which reinforces the stereotype that we all get an attack of the vapours at the slightest thing, whereas in fact those of us of a more "mature" age are a lot tougher than people take us for. I think we are justified in being concerned that when we post on here it is likely to appear on a site many of us are not members of.

Never heard that word before (well we live and learn) but the post sounded condescending Willsmadnan of course we knew it was public and anyone could read posts but it's very different to being linked,

It is used on the political threads quite often BlueBelle but the poster who used it very regularly seems to have disappeared (clutching his/her pearls no doubt ) as we are all 'beyond the pale'.
Whatever that means.

I'm sorry, I must be rather naive, but I've never heard the term pearl clutching before. It appears that it's not very complimentary but what exactly does it mean?

'Having a fit of the vapours' ?

Timid, sanctimonious, or easily offended.
Origin
From the image of a woman clutching her pearl necklace in shock.

I obviously am naive because I really thought that what I posted on Gransnet stayed on Gransnet! It never entered my mind that this site may be linked to other sites, I knew that all the other members of Gransnet could read everything that appears in here, I didn't expect the whole world to be able to read it unless they joined up. If I'm foolish, well, then I'm foolish!

Thank you Jalima.

Rather like what goes on tour stays on tour
(until the media gets hold of it.)

You don't think that you even have to join to read the Active thread

Oh, grammar, I changed that and it doesn't make sense.

I don't think ....

I guess you live and learn.

Or I live and learn!