Boxing Day meal with son and Partner, now say they can't afford it.

Well said B Lass, ditto from me.

I would give a small present and put the £50 towards the meal,

If your son has money worries it will make things worse if you sound as if the meal is more important than him.

Claudiaclaws glad you got it sorted, I am BLIND and so, therefore, I must use assistive technology in order to use the computer. it's just a great shame we can't all get on with life and stop moaning, I'm not well off either but at least your eyes work and YOU will SEE your family, send me the bill

See lots of happy souls are full of Christmas cheer.

Why don't you pay for the meal but don't give the £50 present the meal can be the present

Glad you got it sorted but I’m with BradfordLass on this. No way would I have been annoyed. Disappointed just at first.

Then I’d have immediately said ‘we’ll pay, as we are so looking forward to your company’. Then cut back elsewhere if I’d had to.

Blimey, I couldn't give a **. Bung it on a credit card and enjoy.

Reading your first post I would think you know your son well and would know whether he was tring to get a free meal or not
I have an AC who would say "include us" in any meals out planned and when the time came would say we want to come but we can't afford it knowing we would pay so they werent left out. But eventually we realised it was just to get a free meal . They had plenty of money to go out for dinner 3 days out of 4. So the next time they tried it on we just said 'oh dear, that's a pity" and left it at that.
Glad you have decided to treat your son because I am sure you will enjoy yourselves. Merry Christmas.

Come on, treat your son to a lovely meal in the restaurant. So many Grans don't see their children from one year to the next, Be happy that he is near enough for you to treat, use your credit card to pay, The poor boy is embarrassed enough having to admit it. One day he may be in a position to treat you, HAPPY CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR!

Every year we take DS, DIL and GC to the pantomime for their main joint Christmas present. Every year, we then go to a restaurant for a meal. When it comes to paying the bill, DS is always involved with some kind of emergency with the children which precludes him from being anywhere near the cash desk! It's become part of the family tradition now!

Lucky you if you have a restaurant you can afford to frequent so many times you call in "our" restaurant.
I suggest you pay for their meal and the presents, then after the holiday you all sit down and work out what you can allreally afford. You should just go to "your"restaurant one less time.

After all, Christmas Dinner is really only a roast chicken dinner with a few bits and pieces. If you all shared the food prep and the cost next year it would cost less and be more of a family affair.

Evie64

I'd change the reservation to 2 and then pop round to them afterwards with a bottle of wine? He has said he can't afford it, not that he expects you to pay. Surely they can't be offended if you have the meal without them

You would give the restaurant wine???
Why would they want that? Or do you mean for the son?

Totally with you on this.

Cough Up Granny. Don't be so tight. It's pathetic.

I would pay for it all and be glad they want to come for a meal out with you.

I agree with Doodle