Nashville
I would phone the wife and ask how she is. Suggest that you are a bit confused as to whether your friendship is wanted as you think you may have got things wrong. No doubt the wife will reassure you etc etc and then you close with - ‘Well, shall we leave it that you ring me next time.’
Throw ball into other party’s court and wait. If she values you, she will call.
It has happened to me with both results - some friends called and some faded away. Sometimes I feel we are too old for this kind of confusion.
I have a neighbour who has mentioned inviting me for a coffee for the last ten years. When I ask her how she is she tells me in detail all the exciting things she is up to and how busy she is. Never reciprocates by asking me but is entirely unaware - I think she thinks she is a good neighbour. Hey ho. It takes all sorts.
Poor wife, why should she need to get involved in the OP's sensitivity, if anything really needs to be saying it sould be said to the 'offender. Were I his wife I would tell you to take it up with him.