Are you a confident person

People say I come across has confident but I have tendesy to put myself down , I enjoy meeting people and I think I am a good friend .

Yes I would, I’ve always been confident, not because of anything I can do or have achieved, it’s just always been there!

I wasn’t very confident when I was young but I now marvel at the challenges I faced and overcame. People think of me as being confident but I’m not and hate parties or any social occasions because they bore me and I don’t drink or smoke and I’m a vegetarian so I often feel left out or poorly catered for. My OH doesn’t help and on big occasions he usually buggers off to talk football with ‘ the lads’ leaving me to insist that I don’t want a proper drink or to explain that vegetarians really REALLY don’t eat chicken.

Yes I've had to rely on me most of my life and I am confident in me

Granny gravy I feel the same.

Welcome Littletreehugger48

I'm not confident at all and I also have low self esteem. My mother was the same and my daughter is like it too

I am not confident with people of my own age. I was brought up to believe that everyone else is better than me.

I really wish I was more confident. I have always struggled at parties even though when my husband was alive we attend many functions. Even though I lack confidence in as much as even going into a cafe on my own terrifies me, I have done some things that make people think I am confident - went to uni in a city none of my friends went to, went overseas to work, have changed jobs (by choice) several times, etc. Now I am on my own I am trying to be more confident and last week joined a ladies walking group, which I enjoyed. My parents were both confident (Dad was far more outgoing though) and so was my late brother but sadly the confidence gene passed me by. I am so pleased my sons are confident.

I was very shy as a teenager but in my late twenties I took an evening job in a wine bar and that cured me!
Now I can chat to anybody, even stand up and address a room but I still don't like parties where it's a struggle to have a conversation above the music. Also I don't drink and as people become more and more tipsy and loud I find myself wanting to leave.

I was a confident child until I went to secondary school. By the time I reached my teens it had gone totally. Confidence improved once I left school but a bullying boss in my late teens knocked me down again. Over the years it has come and gone although I have no issues walking into a pub or cafe on my own. My friends cant and will wait outside in pouring rain rather than walk in on their own. Due to daughter living in London for a few years, I have no issues using the tube etc or staying in a hotel on my own which none of my friends will do. But I'm not a confident person in other situations.

Hi bluebell, I can really empathise with yourself and others about lack of confidence.I too feel I have missed out on so much because of this and my shyness.It is not easy.I have always felt I don't fit in.

I am confident in my ability to hold my own in conversations and discussions, as I’m proud of my educational achievements. Not at all confident with the way I look these days though, as I’m very overweight and look more like my Gran with each passing day. She was pleasant-looking, but always seemed to look so old to my then young eyes!

It would be really interesting to hear from others with lack of confidence and self esteem and how they cope in there daily life with it.I am nearly 58 and still struggle very much with lack of confidence?If anyone wants someone to chat to about this issue it would be so good to hear from you.Plus, on top of that I have social anxiety and find it incredibly hard to go out.For example I need to go to dentist st as getting toothache.And I'm dreading it.Not as I have a fear of dentist, but I have a fear of being outside and around other people.

I was a painfully shy child, but I got out of my shell as a teenager and never looked back! Never had any problems with confidence in my working life. I’m still not a very sociable person now but that’s by choice.

I wasn’t but in my career I had to deal with people in all situations and speak to large groups. I don’t like large gatherings now but I am much more confident with people I don’t really know. I have to take a deep breath and think, this is me, I can do it.

It's heartwarming for me to hear that it's not just me who has been held back from enjoying life because of lack of confidence, although I'm sorry that you have.
Due to life events which I won't go into, I'm constantly waiting for the next bad thing to happen. I've never been disappointed so far.

I was desperately shy as a child and although I come across as super-confident I find it very difficult to ‘break into’ social occasions where I don’t know many people.

I’ve tried so hard to overcome this shyness, but it’s not until I am totally comfortable with a situation that I can relax.

However, I would rather the way I am than come across as arrogant.

It's so so good to hear from others with similiar problems.All so reassuring.So,thanks❤️I was meant to get up early this morning to phone dentist to see if any cancellations.But I never managed.As my toothache wasnt bothering me when my alarm went off.And it was just so easy to stay in bed and go back to sleep.With my depression early mornings are the worst.I get such a terrible feeling of dread.Its a dilemma as that's what dentist st says I have to do, phone at 8.30 in morning to get an appointment to get toothache sorted.Hopefuly get an appointment if any cancellations.This is basically what my life is like.depression
, anxiety and constantly stressed and worrying.But I need to get my tooth sorted.Sorry to keep going on about all my problems.But I have no one else to talk to.It would be so good to hear if anyone else who finds it hard to get up in morning and has similiar dilemmas.I just wish I wasn't scared to go outside and I wish I wasn't scared off people.But everything is just so stressful.I have other outside things I need to do and make appointments for etc. And just fills me with dread and anxiety..I can't even engage with people.My mind goes blank and i keep making mistakes and getting mixed up.And it makes me feel so stupid.I just wish I had some friends?Sorry this is so long.But I do find writing on here such a comfort.Anyone with similiar problems that would like to chat are very welcome to contact me.Thanks again to everyone

I never really was, but living alone for many years in between divorce, deaths etc I have learnt I HAVE to be cos there is no one else to fight on my behalf ....i.e. as in getting what I want from service providers, no good being shy or introspective ....I have to go out there and fight I may perhaps appear to be 'stupid woman' but they soon learn I am not !!!!

In the areas of life I feel I am good at I am confident.

I no longer suffer the agonies of embarrassment I went through at 16 when introduced to people for the first time.

I hope and trust I am not confident all the time - that would make me both bumptious and unbearable!

I was very unconfident as a child and in my early teens. I had a mother who constantly undermined any and all the confidence that I could have had by telling me I was useless, clumsy and ugly. At secondary school I was bullied on top of my mother’s constant picking. My father added to it all with his slaps, hidings and his army belt. But when I left school at 15 I was fortunate enough to get an office junior job where I was nurtured, encouraged and praised. That was the turning point for me and it helped enormously with coping at home. Nowadays I’m very confident and even outgoing. Very little phases me, but I do, still, tend to take even the slightest put-down to heart.

I must say,though, that my parents at least taught me how not to parent and I made sure that my own two DC were always happy and confident when they were growing up.

I am confident about some things like chatting with people, stating my point of view, making complaints, politely! I don't seek confrontation but neither do I shy away from it. I lack confidence in talking formally to large gatherings and driving. Passed my test when I was 40, have no sense of direction so always felt anxious and after driving for a few months decided it wasn't for me and stopped. Possibly one of my worst decisions because there's satnav now, but bizarrely, I was always worried I might kill someone crossing the road. However, I make a fantastic backseat driver.

I have lost a lot of confidence as I have got older.

Tabby555, my heart goes out to you . I am not as confident as I appear! Also hesitate about making dental appointments, but unlike you , I don't like dentists !!!!! However I fully recognize the morning dread feeling! I wake with a sense of doom , churning stomach and just feeling dreadful,!!! I have discovered that I must get up as soon as I wake , if tempted to go back to sleep my symptoms are worse on second waking. I sleep with curtains open for maximum daylight, on getting up I sit in the brightest place possible and sip my hot water . My mood lifts and I am ready to shower and face the day. After breakfast I feel almost human and improve as the day goes on. Good luck , hope you have managed to get to your dentist and sort that tooth out . Be kind to yourself , breathe deeply and I suggest you get up as soon as you wake up and absorb some daylight - it definitely helps me .

I certainly wouldn’t describe myself as a confident person as I am more introverted than an extrovert. However I do think that generally we tend to become more confident as we age and learn to stick up for ourselves more.

Having said that though I am friendly. I love spending time with my friends and I can happily chat to strangers in a supermarket queue and have frequently done so over the past year!