Coping with twins

I'm an unidentical twin - my sister and I are like chalk and cheese. One thing I will say is not to expect them to be like two peas in a pod and encourage them to have their own personalities. Never say to one, "Why aren't you more like your sister?" Often there's a louder twin and a quieter one and as is the way - the louder one is listened to while the quieter one has to make an extra effort and is sometimes still ignored. This can cause resentment.

We were put in identical clothes and the same hairstyles until we were allowed our own tastes (at around the age of 9 or 10) - we hated being expected to be the same. Despite our many differences we are good friends most of the time.

Congratulatiions, two in one go is really twice as nice. Need to contact TWINS TRUST. www.twinstrust.org. Used to be called 'TAMBA'(twins and Multiple Births Association). A charity run entirely by parents of twins and more. Most areas have a local branch so parents can meet up with other parents, chat, exchange clothes, toys and ideas. Many branches often have sections for g.parents to meet other similar.

I was priviledged to be one of the original founders of this wonderful organisation back in the 1970's. My identical girl twins had three older siblings (all under 6 years of age at the time). It as during this pregnancy that hubbie had his medcial problems diagnosed as MS and became quite disabled with this very quickly.

Breastfeed is best if possible,, not just for the babies, but also a great time-saver. There is some wonderful equipment out there these days for transporting two babies (much of this has been driven by TAMBA members over the years).

Always treat each child individually, no birthday cards to THE TWINS, etc. No dressing the same. Relax and enjoy and think how lucky you all are.

My girls are now in their late forties, both have excellent careers, one has two daughters of her own, the other just one. They remain the very best of friends and live within half an hour drive of each other. Fortunately, their hubbies also get on well together.

My DDs twins have never been dressed identically and we’ve encouraged them to be themselves. Differences in personality shows up quite quickly. These twins a fraternal not identical.

My DDs friend had identical twins. They were both quiet and well-behaved.

When the arrive just go with the flow.?

Shelflife

ayse, I think the school has been very wise . Different classes is a good idea, ensures there is not constant comparison and each twin can forge their individual characters. In my day teachers were not so thoughtful!

My DD and their father visited the school before they started. The school policy was to separate the girls in the first instance. It was the best thing they could have done. They have their own friends but more importantly IMO they are not competing against each other on a day to day basis. After school they play very well together and cooperate. It’s really helped for them to be treated as individuals.

You’ll quickly learn to cope just as the parents will. My mother had twins of just 18 months old when I was born, in war time, with my father away fighting. A cousin had two babies in 11 months. We all survived.