Big weddings versus more intimate ceremonies

My daughter and son in law got married on an island in the Firth of Forth. She had her sister as Bridesmaid, I was mother of the bride and the groom's mum was best man. . 5 plus the minister who had crossed with us on the ferry. Weddings don't come much smaller than that.

One of my children had a big wedding with marquees in the grounds of a beautiful hotel in the country, a string quartet, a band and disco in different marquees , hotel catering for the wedding breakfast, a lavish buffet in the evening and hundreds attended. Absolutely no expense spared. It was a happy day, but later that year my other child was married in a quiet ceremony with a meal for the closest friends and relatives in a local restaurant. Somehow that seemed more intimate, personal, and special. I felt much more at ease with the quiet event.

Have been Churchwarden for a couple of weddings when limit was 30. Both were lovely and couples so happy to be getting married at last after several tries. Next wedding will be 100 guests and I’m NOT looking forward to that at all from a health perspective. ?

I had a big Wendy most puppy I did not know nor my husband .I’m sure my mother never invited who I wanted it was horrible Would have loved a tiny wedding and S few people at a meal I told my mother it was not what I wanted total waste of money

In 1985 when most weddings were large, ours was under 40 people, including ourselves. I felt cheated at the time, but now, 36 years later I am so glad I can name every single person that attended, why they were there and what they meant to us.

We went many years ago to a lutheren wedding between a german young man and a french young woman who worked in england. The wedding was near Lubeck and I loved the symbolism . The bride and groom came together in a car with flowers along the windows. All the grooms family and friends stood along one side of the path leading into the church. The brides family stood on the other side. So as the two young people progressed up the path, the brides mother walked behind with the bridegrooms father and so on and so that all the congregation join together and walk in behind the couple and sit together showing the joining of the families. It was a very happy occasion and I thought it was lovely that you did not have one side with a couple of pews of people and the other side with perhaps twenty pews full. It was the total group of the congregation wishing the joy to the couple now going to share their lives together. So there was no sense of competition between the families to look better or have more or better presents. Have never forgotten it and the lovely and positive occasion it was

Congratulations Sago to you all - isn't it wonderful to be able to move around and celebrate the couple's happiness together?
I'm sure you had a wonderful time in Dublin
Beautiful reading, so meaningful
Long life & happiness to the bride and groom

The wedding sounds lovely and I think that there are a lot of couples opting for a more intimate wedding that is special rather than a lavish impersonal affair. After all it is about the couple and the vows they take not the expensive trappings. Good luck to them.

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Do not spend more than you can afford, having a big expensive wedding is fine if daddy is paying, for most couples it would be better to have a simple ceremony and a party in the local pub.
There is a lot of truth in the “more expensive wedding the shorter the marriage”.

I can remember going to a big Scottish wedding many decades ago. No money was spared. After the wedding the bride and groom spent their honeymoon in the tiny distant new house thay had just about managed to afford to buy. The couple were young and the groom not then well-paid.

I couldn't help thinking how much better it would have been if instead of a wedding to beat all weddings the brides father had given the couple the most of the money that was spent so that they could have bought a better house near where they worked and been able to go away for at least a short honeymoon.

I hope you all have a wonderful day, Sago.

We gave our DC the same “wedding” fund, but to spend on whatever they wanted (wedding, house, travel, whatever) and they all had the day that suited them and their partners. So we had a big castle do, a smart evening city wedding, a homespun barn celebration after a ceremony at a private house, and a registry office service with just the bride, groom and two witnesses going for a meal afterwards.

Every one was perfect, because they were just what each couple wanted, and that is, quite simply, all that matters.