House proud people

Oopsadaisy1

This is so me……

Love this! Me too.

Anyone ever read the poem 'Dust If You Must' by Rose Milligan?

I love it! Here goes:

Dust if you must, but wouldn't it be better
To paint a picture or write a letter,
Bake a cake, or plant a seed;
Ponder the difference between want and need?

Dust if you must, but there's not much time,
With rivers to swim , and mountains to climb;
Music to hear, and books to read;
Friends to cherish, and life to lead.

Dust if you must, but the world's out there
With the sin in your eyes, and the wind in your hair;
A flutter of snow, a shower of rain,
this day will not come again again.

Dust if you must, but bear in mind,
Old age will come and it's not kind.
And when you go (and go you must)
You, yourself, will make more dust.

Oh how true Ladies!

I am so glad it’s not just me with this view on housework. Ours gets done on a need to do basis, like friends coming round, then it will be a quick tidy up. Life is just to short to spend it on cleaning, which I might add however much you clean and dust it will just come back. Dust gets to a certain level and then you stop seeing it. I always think I will do it on a day when it’s raining, that day arrives and I think I will just finish this book first. So here’s to enjoying life.

Why is practically everyone so proud of doing as little housework as possible. You make it sound as if it's some sort of competition.

I used to do a lot more than I do now due to health problems. I try to do one or two things every day to keep up with the cleaning but often have to sit down for an hour or two afterwards, especially if it's something heavy like pushing the vac around. So one day it's the bathroom, another might be dusting the living room or a bed room. With 2 dogs I have to keep up with the hairs lol. OH sometimes vacs for me which helps. Washing is about the only thing that's always done regularly.
I wouldn't worry about what anyone thinks OP. If they just come to see your home and criticise it they aren't true friends.
My best friend lives in a very untidy cluttered house and she's a lovely caring person. I visit her not the house, and she's the same with me.

I have a magnet on my fridge that says
Boring women have immaculate houses
?

My DD has a problem with anxiety and also has a young son with asd/adhd. She finds that having a cleaning schedule, where she does certain areas of the house on certain days, gives her a sense of something that she actually has control over. With young children in the house, and a shortage of money meaning that they can't decorate, at least she knows that it is clean. I tend to do housework as and when it needs doing, except for making sure that the toilet is clean and also the food preparation areas in the kitchen. Kitchen cupboards are cleaned when I notice sticky marks appearing under tins and jars.

I used to feel like this. Too many houseproud friends and relatives who think they have a right to make remarks about those who are a bit more relaxed.

Then one day it hit me. They are scared they are missing out on something by being tied to the housework. They are trapped in their need for cleanliness and the only way to feel ok about it is if others are the same. I remember the day I said to my sister, 'I used to feel the need to be houseproud. Now I'd rather go out when the sun shines and do it later.' Not only did she stop making comparisons she started choosing the sun over the housework herself - sometimes, and thanked me for it! She's still houseproud but she let go a tiny bit.

When you really believe that your standards are just as you want them, and that's perfectly acceptable, and other peoples' standards are their problems, the need to listen to them just melts away.

Do it the way that suits you and be happy.

I have lots of hobbies and interests and work 2 mornings a week but i can't relax if my house is messy. I used to be much more relaxed about the state of the house when my kids were at home because it was impossible to keep it tidy! I wouldn't criticise anyone for doing as much or little as they want to do, its not my business!

I think everyone should do as they please, life is to short to worry about trivial things. Go out and enjoy yourself doing whatever suits you best. If people decline going to your house for a meal that’s their choice not to sit in a dusty house, you can always meet in cafes

In relation to housework I think one of the strangest/ funny comments that was said to me came from this couple.
We were moored in Paris on our way home from a year on the French canals/ Mediterranean. ( all part of my boring life)
They saw our British flag and wanted to chat ( they were on their way to England to go to Wimbledon.
We invited them onboard and she said ^ oh, your so tidy and you didn’t know we were coming^ ?

I wouldn't criticise anyone for doing as much or little as they want to do, its not my business" I agree f77.

I don't know why there's an assumption from a lot of contributors to this thread that those of us who are houseproud need to get a life.

It appears to be OK to be critical of those who are houseproud but not OK to criticise those who aren't. Criticism of both is wrong IMO; live and let live.

Absolutely agree with you, my home isn’t perfect, it’s not a show house, it’s a home that’s lived in.

Houseproud implies you care what other people think of your home. I rarely have other people in my house but I like living in clean conditions and have cleaned my whole house once a week since I’ve ever owned one! It’s up to other people what they do but would not be keen on visiting anyone if their house was visibly dirty or smelly ( with dogs or smoke eg). I certainly wouldn’t tell anyone else what to do re cleaning though.

Deedaa

As long as my house is free from fleas, mice and any other "things", no one has been poisoned and we all have clean clothes to go out in I'm really not that bothered. My main argument about house work is that you can spend hours forensically cleaning and nobody will even notice.

Absolutely, I think exactly the same as you. My home is not perfect, it’s not a show house, it’s a home that is lived in!

I had a friend who MIL used to come in and check her house when she arrived. One time she only had time to tidy up before MIL was coming and so she just sprayed the polish around the house like air freshener . When her MIL came in she said oh I can smell you've been cleaning and just sat down on the sofa! It was never a dirty house anyway but it got MIL off of her back!.

Smile, agree, then do what ever the flip you want!!

Thanks for the amusing comments and posts. My mother used to say, "The dust will be here long after me". I agree. For those who need to feel their house is under control, that's right for them and for those, like me, who really couldn't care less as long as its 'clean enough' its right for us. No point in arguing. I wouldn't bother trying to help with suggestions for corner cutting... they will only revolt! And it will confirm your errant ways!
I would be proud of the fact that you don't need your self worth to be wrapped up in how clean your house is. You obviously have a life! Enjoy!

Ps As I write an ad for Dyson 'Full Size Cleaning' has popped up. I really dislike this 'spying!

Whats it got to do with them...probably jealous as they havent much else exciting to do with their lives..carry on being you

Deedaa

As long as my house is free from fleas, mice and any other "things", no one has been poisoned and we all have clean clothes to go out in I'm really not that bothered. My main argument about house work is that you can spend hours forensically cleaning and nobody will even notice.

Deedaa

Your last sentence nailed it for me.

"My main argument about house work is that you can spend hours forensically cleaning and nobody will even notice."

When I've sometimes had a bout of 'forensic' cleaning and pointed it out to my partner, he says things like... "oh, it looked fine anyway - always looks clean to me"

I'm glad you said what you said because I was planning a bit of a marathon clean over the weekend, and now I'm really not going to bother... there are more pleasurable things to do in life.

Thank gawd there’s other people like me! I can find much more exciting things to do than constant housework! As you say, when necessary I can get it pretty reasonable but as I live on my own I don’t need to impress anyone most of the time!?

Just take no notice of them. Live life your own way and be happy. If their conversation drives you mad try changing the subject.

Life's too short to spend it with a duster in your hand! There's far more interesting things to do.

I clean bathrooms and kitchen work surfaces daily, and everything else as and when I fancy doing it, or when it looks too bad to ignore any longer!

If someone is coming to visit I make a special effort which I'm doing at the moment, though my asthma is slowing me down so I just do a bit each day. It will all be clean by the time they get here.

My Mum was houseproud with #what was visible, but if you moved the furniture the dust, dirt and hair etc was revealed, and don't even look in the cupboards!!

I once worked with a woman whose house was clinically clean, you could actually smell the bleach as you stepped through the front door. If anyone used the bathroom while visiting her she immediately slipped upstairs to clean it again. She worried about her children catching 'things'. But her children had more stomach upsets, allergies and days off school than mine ever had. She thought I was terrible because I didn't vacuum every day.

My grandmother described a lady she knew who was ultra house proud as ‘having the mind of a housemaid!’

mrsgreenfingers56

Love that poem, so very true!