The School Prom - For or Against?

It's become another financial burden for parents and competition between the girls ... and probably between the parents too.

Some in my granddaughter's year not only had a prom dress but professional makeup, false lashes, false nails, hair styling and the hire of a limo to arrive in style! Then there are the photographs!

Fortunately my granddaughter just wanted the dress (which was enough hassle and expense in itself), and did her own nails and hair.

Personally I think it's got out of hand.

Definitely against.
Lots of chances for the haves to laud it over the have nots.
Dresses costing £100’s, limo hire, even daddy’s helicopter has been known.
Teens should be learning about social equality not inequality in these times.

Another ridiculous American (money making) event.

I’m very, very against. How I would have hated it! So competitive about the unimportant things.

Do all schools have them? Surely not.

We did an end-of-school review, written by ourselves and quite funny. Much better,

The best way to control them is to stop schools or associated groups from putting on any leaving event that requires a child to pay more than £5-£10 to attend or requires any clothes that a child would not normally have in their wardrobe - jeans and T shirt, for example.

When DD graduated from drama school, I think they all made their own dresses and DDs involved an old sheet and lots of paper hankies.

Actually, why not insist that all prom clothes, boys and girls, should be recycled from something else, like the second round on Sewing Bee?

Hyped up occasion; very stressful and expensive for many. Think the end of term days out at theme parks were a better idea!

The whole thing has got completely out if hand !!! Ridiculous.

(Silly) fancy dress?
Paintballing?

Think they are one of the more horrible Americanisms that have arrived here. What was wrong with the Disco night that used to beheld for school leavers.

I also really dislike the stupid idea of babies (nursery schools) have 'graduations'

I was so very proud of one of g.daughters, who totally refused to go to her school prom after GCSE's.. Her Mum did say she would cover any costs without problems, her many friends kept trying to get her to change her mind - BUT she opposed the idea of these things and was adament about not attending. Wonderfully principled and strong minded.

Her Mum went out and purchased top price tickets for musical she knew her daughter wished to go to in London's West End for that day and kept those as a surprise for her until that day came. She had a wonderful time.

In the school where I taught, the pupils were in charge of organising the prom. The actual school had little to do with it nor did they have any say over how much it cost. There was a bank of suitable clothes gifted by previous pupils which were available. I attended a few but it was spoiled by some kids getting drunk and becoming a nuisance. I spent one prom in a girls bathroom making sure alcohol wasn't consumed in secret. It was not the way I wanted to spend a very expensive evening or remember a year group! Rules were tightened up but I stopped going. I think the whole thing has got out of control and far too expensive.

I think it’s got completely out of hand and is inappropriate when some of these kids’ parents may be struggling to feed them. I would like to see schools stopping these events and substituting them with something low key and accessible to all.

We call them school valedictories or formal nights here and some still call them the Deb’s Ball. Good chance for grandparents to go and see their lovely grandchildren and have a good evening out ,at least until the dreaded Covid. They give the kids ballroom dance lessons at school in preparation, can’t go astray. Most girls hire their gowns but some actually buy them.

American twaddle!

Exactly Nemo

If that’s what the school decides usually with the input from its pupils I hope it’s an enjoyable evening for all.

I imagine if parents have daughters the cost could be considerable and a certain competitive pressure on how they present themselves on those girls I imagine. I had boys so not such a massive outlay. It's another financial pressure piled on in a day and age where everything has morphed into a huge event, baby naming parties, showers, hen dos, stag dos, weddings, renewal of vows. I remember when mine were at school the prom was a rite of passage and how they loved to get together at that age with their class year, so we went along with it, at a later stage the graduation from university seemed small potatoes in comparison.

I agree that they are an unnecessary import and put pressure on parents and students alike.
Some schools are trying to help by providing pre-loved clothing but that is, in fact, buying in to the system.

Oh I loved my debs ball (as it was called then I think)
My hair was done by my mum, makeup by me, and my dress was a big puffed sleeved monstrosity which I loved.
My son’s both loved theirs and they and their friends all got ready at our house, however mine was in the school gymnasium and theirs was in an event centre which was a bit fancier and hence a bit more pricey.
I’m sure it’s gotten far more expensive, but I’d hate for such a lovely event to end.

Schools & pupils are not known for considering costs to parents GrannyGravy so maybe input from parents could be a good idea.

nanna8

We call them school valedictories or formal nights here and some still call them the Deb’s Ball. Good chance for grandparents to go and see their lovely grandchildren and have a good evening out ,at least until the dreaded Covid. They give the kids ballroom dance lessons at school in preparation, can’t go astray. Most girls hire their gowns but some actually buy them.

Yes, and I've seen some of them dressed up on their way to the proms.
I think they're probably a year older and leaving school altogether whereas here, I think, it's the Y11 which has a prom. I might be wrong.

nanna8
Are they called Graduations over there?
They are in NQ I know

My GDs ‘prom’ caused no end of bad feeling and falling out among her classmates it was very rowdy and she left early as it was just not what she’d hoped for. So it’s a no from me.

Just glad they weren't held in my day or when our boys were at school. What's wrong with the end of the school year disco?

Totally out of hand and over the top.How can parents who struggle over cost of school uniforms,bus fares,meal costs etc foot the bill.
Day trips with activities would be a far better experience with maybe the pupils organising sponsored activitys during the previous yr to help fund costs which in itself would be fun.
Junior schools have also jumped on band wagon,
My friends daughter aged 11 wanted a spray tan for her final year black tie dinner at local restaurant.Next was hiring of a limo.Is it the parents trying to upstage each other.
Why on earth are we allowing children to think this is the norm?