Another bastion bites the dust?

biglouis

Mansplaining

I sell online and a male bought an item from me and then gave me a long list of instructions as to how it was to be packed.

I told him I had only been sending items around the world for 20 years but thanked him for his "useful" instructions on how to pack for international travel which I would be sure to file in an appropriate place.

He replied "dont mention it" and clearly did not see the sarcasm which dripped from every word.

Did you actually comply with what the customer requested regarding the packing of his purchase?

Surely what I post cannot be mansplaining because there is no intention on my part to treat anyone with disdain.

StarDreamer

LINK > Making the Chocolate Teapot

Maybe I should have given the chap the video and he could have learned.

I blame us mums!
Little girls are independent. ‘I’ll do it up, I’ll put my coat on’ I’ll help’ etc.
Boys sit back and put a foot up to have their shoes/socks put on while reading or on a games console. They leave their dirty dishes/washing etc for someone else to pick up, and because were in a hurry, we found it!
We need to change this behaviour from the outset ladies!

Allow - not found!

If my boys left dirty washing around it didn’t get washed. They had to put it in the basket. I never waited on them.

StarDreamer

Surely what I post cannot be mansplaining because there is no intention on my part to treat anyone with disdain.

Isn’t the point about mansplaining that it’s innate, you don’t have to intend to do it to do it anyway?

My son was the neat tidy one that did things my daughter was the lazy messy one. I don't think it is in built but the way we treat boys and girls differently. We have different expectations and give them different goals. We should treat men and women the same if we expect them to act the same. We should keep gender seperation to only where it is really absolutly neccerssary and at all other times it should be banned. Then maybe there will be less of the us and them attitude and more empathy between the genders.

Sueki44

I too feel a bit sorry for men. I appreciate that historically they have had a pretty good deal but I do feel the scales have shifted.
White, working class males are now the ones least likely to go to university.

We have screamed (rightly) for equality, but are now asking for time off for periods and the menopause. Chunks of maternity leave also hamper womens progress in the workplace. I can understand why some men feel resentful.

I don’t think your grasp of the word ‘equality’ is correct. Equality means being treated with equal rights, equal respect, and being paid equally. It doesn’t mean being treated exactly the same. If it did, there would be no gendered toilets, for example and women in white collar jobs would need to wear suits and ties. Time off for menopause and periods is, therefore, treating women with equal respect.

Yes so for example adjustments for people with disabilities is treating people equally. If you treated people exactly the same many would experience real disadvantage.

My eldest ironed his own shirts from 15 and still does (plus his daughter's dresses now). My youngest baked me a great cake for mother's day and loves the fact that his partner (female) has more power tools than he has. So lets realise that not all women wait on their DSs and not all men assign women certain roles.

If women had been the dominant sex/gender for the past 30,000 years or so some of them would find it difficult to concede part of their power and roles to upsurging, successful men. We need to see this in terms of equal and different (as Joni Mitchel sang) and recognise that nowadays men need help in adjusting rather than knee-jerk abuse.

My DiL is a Veterinary Surgeon, graduated 4 years ago and around 75% of her cohort then were female.
It's even higher now.

Sheila11

I blame us mums!
Little girls are independent. ‘I’ll do it up, I’ll put my coat on’ I’ll help’ etc.
Boys sit back and put a foot up to have their shoes/socks put on while reading or on a games console. They leave their dirty dishes/washing etc for someone else to pick up, and because were in a hurry, we found it!
We need to change this behaviour from the outset ladies!

I think you might have something there. Never having boys myself I can see DD's different attitude toward their different-sex children.
I was an Infants teacher for many years and often found the above true most of the boys lined up to have their coats fastened and scarves put on. They wore their gloves or mittens on strings so they would not lose them. Getting dressed after a P.E lesson was a marathon of misplaced shoes,socks and ties etc. Even though they had been given the instructions whilst undressing to put all their clothes they took off on their own chair. Some could not even recognise their own name.
If we look closely we can all recognise the signs in DH's my DD's used to call their father "Where's my?"

I grew up in a male dominant family eg professional footballer, high end cars, foreign holidays by the males, even the food we ate was geared towards physical fitness need for adult males. I have glimpsed a little if women's football and was so disappointed to see the running up to players and cuddling, the sliding on knees (whatever that is called) whenever a player has scored, for basically doing their job. How many other sports do we see this seeking praise, "aren't I great" behaviour. Can't see a Wimbledon winner running about waving arms, cuddling whoever on a win and let's be honest there must be a lot more adrenalin pulsing away in an indivual who has got there on their own than one in a team to warrant such displays. To me, females can be as good, even better than males but do we need to copy their behaviour to show we are.

That's the difference between a team sport and an individual sport I would have thought, many tennis players signal in some way to their coach and family when they win.

I agree that women do seem to be taking over and men are feeling threatened. However the crowing from some women on tv interviews is not attractive. In some ways I feel sorry for the men, most if them are supportive and happy to cheer on the women so let’s give them some slack.

Kate1949

I feel rather sorry for men these days. My lovely nephew was told by a female colleague during a discussion 'As a white heterosexual male, your opinion is irrelevant.'

That is a disgrace and exactly the kind of thing that bothers me. Women just want equality, nobody is superior.

biglouis - could it not be equally valid that he sends those instructions to all his Sellers - both male and female - as he has had a bad experience in the past. Unless you have other information you have not disclosed?

Well said Jackiest! After all, we are all people. Let’s treat all people well. Nuff said.

It's very sad what's happening to the world now everyone is being put onto boxes why can't people just be people and judged accordingly not what sex they are or what colour they are. I fear for my grandchildren it's a very sad depressing world

If only we could get away from putting people into categories or boxes, and just saw each other as PEOPLE, and in work situations, employed according to ability or qualification, rather than having to confirm to quotas or tick boxes.

Unfortunately, there are cultures where women are seen as inferior, possessions, something of lesser consequence than men so I'm afraid this sort of division will never go away.

If segregation was done away with where it is not neccerssary and irrelevent than maybe segregation where it is neccerssary such as toilets and changing rooms would be treated with more respect.

Women in sport, government, on TV hosting documentaries about women's health, lots of stuff about menopause, gender, safety, inappropriate behaviour towards men and from men etc I get the feeling it is all just an unexplored area and once it peeks something else will take over. For a while we were saturated with stuff about colonialism, people of colour, ethnicity and who our ancestors were and what they did. That seems to have quietened in favour of women at the moment.

''My DiL is a Veterinary Surgeon, graduated 4 years ago and around 75% of her cohort then were female.
It's even higher now.''

Talking to a local vet who had turned up to give routine care to the local riding stable's horses, she amazed me by saying that she wished she had gone into teaching instead as so many of her friends had.

They were paid better AND it was only by being the pricipal in such a business that vets earned so much