David and Tristan Tate and their “supporters”

Cossy

Galaxy

I think that's misogyny directed to yourself cossy .
I knew what you meant.

🤣🤣🤣 Honestly, I drive myself mad, I’m 67 and used to have the memory of at least two elephants, now I have the bottom of several elephants and the brain of a fish with slight learning difficulties! Grrrrrr

Cossy as an aside, could you start a gang for those of us who identify with
* honestly, I drive myself mad, I’m 67 and used to have the memory of at least two elephants, now I have the bottom of several elephants and the brain of a fish with several learning difficulties *

This sets out precisely how I feel, tho worse as I’m 77 in two weeks so my brain is tired

butterandjam

@keepingquiet When I grew up in the 70s it was perfectly acceptable to be groped, kissed and more by men at work and in the local pubs.

It absolutely was not acceptable to me or any women/men I knew.

Pornography was everywhere- in the school playground, the local shop, on the TV and in the cinemas, not least to say in our homes through newspapers,books and magazines.

That's nonsense. The nearest thing to porn in 1970 UK newspapers was Page 3 tits. UK TV certainly never broadcast an erect penis let alone places to put it. Even today TV can't broadcast the kind of porn images kids can see on their mobile phones.

You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.

I agree.

However, it was accepted or hidden that men could grope women and girls in the workplace but I found a way to deal with this when I was ignored when making a complaint.

Porn was always around - there were magazines as well as Page 3.

The Tates are a malign influence on young boys. It is quite frightening.

Porn was always around - there were magazines as well as Page 3.

They were supposed to be on the 'top shelf' in newsagents, out of the reach of children!

Allira

^Porn was always around - there were magazines as well as Page 3.^

They were supposed to be on the 'top shelf' in newsagents, out of the reach of children!

There's a big difference between a photo in a top=shelf magazine , and real people performing every imaginable sexual perversion in films , with sound effects, which any child can watch secretly on their phone in the playground or in their bedroom.

Where do school children get the idea to film their own sex acts on their phone and send it to their friends phones?

butterandjam, exactly. The top shelf magazines were so much less damaging in comparison with what children can access on a smart phone. Easy access seems to be normalising damaging and dangerous sexual practices

Iam64

butterandjam, exactly. The top shelf magazines were so much less damaging in comparison with what children can access on a smart phone. Easy access seems to be normalising damaging and dangerous sexual practices

I was very involved in the Top Shelf campaign in the 70s.
We would go into shops selling these magazines and move them to the top shelf.

The only time I’ve been groped I kicked him so hard on the shin ( in my wooden soled platform shoes) he dropped to his knees.

I had a boss who was continuously telling me he had just had sex with me in his head. I laughed at him and told him and that’s where it’s going to stay 😂

butterandjam

@keepingquiet When I grew up in the 70s it was perfectly acceptable to be groped, kissed and more by men at work and in the local pubs.

It absolutely was not acceptable to me or any women/men I knew.

Pornography was everywhere- in the school playground, the local shop, on the TV and in the cinemas, not least to say in our homes through newspapers,books and magazines.

That's nonsense. The nearest thing to porn in 1970 UK newspapers was Page 3 tits. UK TV certainly never broadcast an erect penis let alone places to put it. Even today TV can't broadcast the kind of porn images kids can see on their mobile phones.

You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.

I am obviously a decade older than keepinguiet. My heyday was the 1960s and the worst pornography generally available in newsagents in my youth was Playboy. There was worse, if you know where to look for it, but generally people didn't.

Certainly moving or active porn was almost unknown outside seedy clubs in Soho. It would have been the occasional determined sleazeball, who knew where to get 'dirty' Standard 8 films and had a home film projector to use them on. It would have been very difficult to watch them in secret in most homes. comsidring the euipment reuired.

I spent most of my working life in a predominantly male environment and certainly was never 'groped, kissed and more' at work and never experienced much more than occasional groping outside work - and that was certainly not considered 'acceptable'

MOnica, spot on about the pornography in the sixties., as well as groping never being acceptable.

Petra - bet we were on reclaim the night demos at the same period as removing top shelf mags

The normalisation of dangerous, abusive sexual practices needs to be challenged

Not sure who put *
You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.*

Sorry if I’m being a bit dense, are you saying Tates are or are not influencing our young males?

Iam64

MOnica, spot on about the pornography in the sixties., as well as groping never being acceptable.

Petra - bet we were on reclaim the night demos at the same period as removing top shelf mags

The normalisation of dangerous, abusive sexual practices needs to be challenged

I could not agree more.

Soft porn and sex is perfectly acceptable, however some hard porn showing women being abused in all kinds of ways could be very damaging to young males perceptions of what females “expect” and could influence their feelings on things akin to rape and consent.

Iam64

Cossy

Galaxy

I think that's misogyny directed to yourself cossy .
I knew what you meant.

🤣🤣🤣 Honestly, I drive myself mad, I’m 67 and used to have the memory of at least two elephants, now I have the bottom of several elephants and the brain of a fish with slight learning difficulties! Grrrrrr

Cossy as an aside, could you start a gang for those of us who identify with
* honestly, I drive myself mad, I’m 67 and used to have the memory of at least two elephants, now I have the bottom of several elephants and the brain of a fish with several learning difficulties *

This sets out precisely how I feel, tho worse as I’m 77 in two weeks so my brain is tired

Wait till you are rapidly approaching 87, like me. You will wonder where you mislaid your brain. Probably put it "somewhere safe, where I can find it again" .

*Elegran

Iam64
Cossy
Galaxy
I think that's misogyny directed to yourself cossy grin.
I knew what you meant.
🤣🤣🤣 Honestly, I drive myself mad, I’m 67 and used to have the memory of at least two elephants, now I have the bottom of several elephants and the brain of a fish with slight learning difficulties! Grrrrrr
Cossy as an aside, could you start a gang for those of us who identify with
* honestly, I drive myself mad, I’m 67 and used to have the memory of at least two elephants, now I have the bottom of several elephants and the brain of a fish with several learning difficulties *

This sets out precisely how I feel, tho worse as I’m 77 in two weeks so my brain is tired
Wait till you are rapidly approaching 87, like me. You will wonder where you mislaid your brain. Probably put it "somewhere safe, where I can find it again"*

Honestly, I cannot even imagine reaching those fine ages and having any kind of functioning brain!

Cossy

Not sure who put *
You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.*

Sorry if I’m being a bit dense, are you saying Tates are or are not influencing our young males?

It was me, in response to Keepingquiet, who wrote

"I do think we need to calm these whole Tate influencer things down a little. Yes, they are vile men making a lot of money but are that many young men really that taken in by this?
We mustn't give them attention they don't deserve, <....>
This idea of exploiting women for money or gratification is nothing new- it is just more 'hidden' amongst a few sad, lonely men"

The Tates ARE influencing young males.

Take a look in Mumsnet; at the number of mothers now being given verbal and physical dogs abuse by their schoolboy sons .

butterandjam

Thank you, I agree, it’s not hidden and only old men.

It’s those young men and teenage boys about whom I’m concerned, it needs stamping on and eradicated!

M0nica

butterandjam

@keepingquiet When I grew up in the 70s it was perfectly acceptable to be groped, kissed and more by men at work and in the local pubs.

It absolutely was not acceptable to me or any women/men I knew.

Pornography was everywhere- in the school playground, the local shop, on the TV and in the cinemas, not least to say in our homes through newspapers,books and magazines.

That's nonsense. The nearest thing to porn in 1970 UK newspapers was Page 3 tits. UK TV certainly never broadcast an erect penis let alone places to put it. Even today TV can't broadcast the kind of porn images kids can see on their mobile phones.

You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.

I am obviously a decade older than keepinguiet. My heyday was the 1960s and the worst pornography generally available in newsagents in my youth was Playboy. There was worse, if you know where to look for it, but generally people didn't.

Certainly moving or active porn was almost unknown outside seedy clubs in Soho. It would have been the occasional determined sleazeball, who knew where to get 'dirty' Standard 8 films and had a home film projector to use them on. It would have been very difficult to watch them in secret in most homes. comsidring the euipment reuired.

I spent most of my working life in a predominantly male environment and certainly was never 'groped, kissed and more' at work and never experienced much more than occasional groping outside work - and that was certainly not considered 'acceptable'

It's social media. The dark web.

I think some of you led far more sheltered lives that I did in the 70s.

Maybe it's because I had older siblings who brought this stuff into the home.

One sibling worked in a library and brought the backroom books home, which I read as a teenager and I can say very little was left to the imagination there...

My sibling and I used to help out my mum by making the beds, and stuff we found in an other sibling's room was equally perverted and we used to look at these pictures together. Looking back I can't believe some of the stuff I read.

Did it corrupt us? Well, it's hard to say...

I also recall some pretty heavy stuff being shown on TV too. Also we had magazines in the school playground that were passed around.

Maybe I grew up in a different country, it certainly feels like it at times.

I still think we need to focus on the positive side of our young men's lives instead of making out they are all predators looking to beat up young women.

Yes, it isn't acceptable that teachers are experiencing harrassment in the classroom. What is to be done about it?

I think that's part of the problem.
Boys and young men need positive role models.
The toxic Tates are not the answer.

i am not sure whether living on an army base, going to a technological university in the north of England then working predominantly in the engineering industry counts as a shelterd background.

I worked in central London at one point close to Soho. I walked around there and it was very clear what was on offer, but people had to make an effort to access it. Not like now where they just turn their phones on and watch extreme pornography on the bus or train journey home.

M0nica

i am not sure whether living on an army base, going to a technological university in the north of England then working predominantly in the engineering industry counts as a shelterd background.

I worked in central London at one point close to Soho. I walked around there and it was very clear what was on offer, but people had to make an effort to access it. Not like now where they just turn their phones on and watch extreme pornography on the bus or train journey home.

I agree M0nica. And now our children are not safe even in their bedrooms where they can access hard porn sites that might show rape and violence towards women. Is like the very worst of Soho being inside the child’s bedroom, no effort needed, and no red flags raised for the parents because they think their child is doing their homework etc., is just too easy and some children will find a way round parental filters.

Cossy

Not sure who put *
You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.*

Sorry if I’m being a bit dense, are you saying Tates are or are not influencing our young males?

You’re not alone. I’ve read that post several times and can’t work out if butter jam is for or against Tate.

petra

Cossy

Not sure who put *
You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.*

Sorry if I’m being a bit dense, are you saying Tates are or are not influencing our young males?

You’re not alone. I’ve read that post several times and can’t work out if butter jam is for or against Tate.

No, as far as I can tell, it's not butterandjam saying the Tates do not have influence on young men, although it is rather confusing.

I think it was in response to this post from keepingquiet who disagrees that the Tate brothers have any influence on the behaviour of boys and young men.

Quotekeepingquiet Fri 13-Mar-26 16:24:38

Quotekeepingquiet Fri 13-Mar-26 16:24:38
I do think we need to calm these whole Tate influencer things down a little. Yes, they are vile men making a lot of money but are that many young men really that taken in by this?

We mustn't give them attention they don't deserve, though I know most people will just carry on regardless because it is in the news today...

I don't see any much evidence of this behaviour apart from on the on-line world.

I have two grandsons and plenty of nephews and none of them would take any notice of this nonsense. They know what they would get back in return if they did.

🤔

I would say I dont have enormous concerns about the tates influence specifically, I obviously think they should be imprisoned for their crimes if found guilty. There are numerous things that impact, and I think it has been blown out of all proportion, whilst the other misogyny is ignored ( Theroux is a sex work is work guy - I think his ytpe of misogyny is as dangerous if not more so)

Allira

^Porn was always around - there were magazines as well as Page 3.^

They were supposed to be on the 'top shelf' in newsagents, out of the reach of children!

For some reason, parks were full of magazines that people dumped. Perhaps someone's mother/wife spotted a magazine under the bed and rather than her finding the whole stash, the other mags were taken to a park and dumped.
Mind you, go back to the early eighties, while porn was making big inroads into the video market, video recorders were quite rare, the internet hadn't been invented, so the only porn was magazines.

Allira

petra

Cossy

Not sure who put *
You're completely wrong about the Tates influence in everyday life btw; the evidence in boys behaviour to female staff and girls in class is widely reported by schools.*

Sorry if I’m being a bit dense, are you saying Tates are or are not influencing our young males?

You’re not alone. I’ve read that post several times and can’t work out if butter jam is for or against Tate.

No, as far as I can tell, it's not butterandjam saying the Tates do not have influence on young men, although it is rather confusing.

I think it was in response to this post from keepingquiet who disagrees that the Tate brothers have any influence on the behaviour of boys and young men.

*Quotekeepingquiet Fri 13-Mar-26 16:24:38*

Just to clear things up here- I didn't say (or mean to say) that the Tate bros had no influence on young men but that this influence is over-exaggerated in my opinion, and for what it's worth here.

I have been heartened by some other posts on-line echoing these opinions from young men themselves and I wish I knew how to share them.

This is just one documentary (which I haven't yet seen because it doesn't seem to be on mainstream channels) with a few attention seeking men, and I understand the Tates are not even interviewed- correct me if I'm wrong.

What I was attempting to say is that the whole response to this documentary has been blown out a proportion it doesn't deserve, and maybe we should be focussing on all the young men out there who are doing great things for their families and communities.

For those of you who worry about the impact on your grandsons I would say why not ask them? You may be pleasantly surprised and reassured by their replies.