What is our role as older people?

When I was working I was told that my special talent was lowering the tone of the staff room so I have carried on doing that in an over sixties group that I am part of.
It generally makes people laugh so I'm happy with that role.

Luckygirl - I’m sorry that you are not being heard. I’ve put what you’ve said in the context of what else you’ve shared about your life on other threads and feel I understand what you are saying.

I feel part of my role is to smile at babies and toddlers, some of whom I see struggle to make eye contact.

I help my family in whatever capacity I can manage even if it's just emptying their dishwasher.

I own a dog and he keeps me busy being a good dog owner. He gives me exercise which helps to keep me thinking I may live longer than I feared after recent health scare.

I try to be a good friend to my friends old and new.

In between coping with new medical conditions which waited till now to surprise me, I have taken up learning a musical instrument and music theory. Not structured just self-study. Its about the first time in my life I actually have time to just choose what I want to do

To be happy is a good role, to support the younger family members,

I’m 76yo and had my first daughter 3 days after my 21st birthday. My husband was a serial adulterer and terrible father. My second marriage 8 years after my divorce was worse than the first. He became increasingly controlling and physically abusive until I was forced to leave everything behind when I fled the family home aged 46 with 3 children under 5yo. I’ve spent most of my adult life until mid 60s being mother and father and now I want to do NOTHING except just be. I don’t want to volunteer and tbh even travelling to see my children is a hassle because they all live far away. I’m happy because we keep in close contact every day via FaceTime and WhatsApp and occasional visits. I’m happy if they’re happy and that’s all that matters.

merlotgran

What is my role?
I think it’s to love and cherish what’s left of my family, make the best of everything that comes my way, keep my independence and reasonably good health for as long as possible, only ask for help if I absolutely have to (usually for practical things)

And be the font of all wisdom, offering advice and understanding without opening my mouth and putting my foot in it (that one’s the hardest)

In order to be this paragon I have to get on with the neighbours, be of use to the community and never, ever whinge. 😇😇

A regular 🍷 or G&T helps enormously.

I’ll join you in a 🍷. I never whinge either, another😇 🤥

I spent a long time not knowing who I was, in reality. Fulfilled many roles, some better than others, professionally successful mainly, wonderful husband and children and now grandchildren who I love with all my heart. A couple of years ago, in my 60s, I was diagnosed as autistic and it all fell into place over the following few months. Lots of reflecting, quite a bit of overthinking, some Aha moments and some frankly appalling pain, but it made a difference in a good way. Getting older, every morning that I wake up, now, is a bonus, I am grateful for it. I stretch, listen to the world outside moving around, know that my husband has enabled us to have the means to enjoy the day, week, month, year. My eldest daughter has given me a mobility scooter and I can more easily get to the library. A joy. I can still work as a freelancer and continue to contribute to the community. My son and daughter in law just had their first baby, our fifth grandchild. Life is good. There are no words to share how grateful and privileged I feel. My role? I fill a gap in the world and am content to leave it at that.

My role is whatever I choose it to be. I will be the one to define that, not others.

Mine is to be there for my family when im needed. Enjoy family time. But mostly enjoy my time doing the things I want to do. I’m booking a big holiday later this year to travel around Thailand. I’m going to drive from the south to Northumberland. My bucket list gets bigger every month. I’m divorced happy healthy and 70. 🌸

This is timely for me.
I have a few medical issues and seem to take a tablet to keep nearly all my body working.
Today I woke up and very much wondered what the point is.
I am no help to my children and can see a future where I'm a burden.
I still have my husband of over 40 years, but we struggle to find common ground these days. I try to be grateful just for being here, but I really do need a purpose and can't seem to find one at present. This will pass, but i can understand where the OP is coming from.

I don’t see myself as having a role. Perhaps women have got so used to assuming different roles throughout their lives, that there comes a time when we just have to be, to enjoy life, to do what brings peace of mind and take care of ourselves.

Juicylucy

Mine is to be there for my family when im needed. Enjoy family time. But mostly enjoy my time doing the things I want to do. I’m booking a big holiday later this year to travel around Thailand. I’m going to drive from the south to Northumberland. My bucket list gets bigger every month. I’m divorced happy healthy and 70. 🌸

And if just walking down the garden were too much cos of breathlessness how then does happiness feature. Bucket list? .... I wish.

Don't misunderstand.me, I am not moping around all the time and enjoy lots of things that are within my limitations. But that list is dwindling, and I think it is entirely reasonable to feel sad about that and to ask what the point is some days.

I wpuld live to.be of use to someone! .... and I am in small ways I am sure. But there is nothing about all this that gets my vote .... and if anyone else tells me how strong I am and how young I look, I might resort to screaming. No grey hair is not an indication of health!

We do not need a role. For most of us we have worked, raised families looked after our grandchildren if we are so lucky

We have a lifetime of experience to offer but a lot of times it’s overlooked as younger generations forget we were the go getters of yesteryear

So I suggest it’s time to enjoy the rest of what you’ve got and if someone calls on you for help then do your best to help them

(Tongue in cheek) judging from the amount of money I’ve spent recently, my role is to support the local economy!

crazyH

Fartooold - what is LD ?

I take LD to mean Learning Difficulties.

"What's the Point?" and "Why are we here?" Or even "Is this all there is?" Humans, not just the old ones, have been asking themselves these questions for thousands of years. I find the answers here helpful and quite moving.

I agree with Gango.
We have brought up the kids as well ad keeping a job. Now is the time to enjoy oneself. I am a member of a few clubs, enjoy holidays abroad as well as visiting my son and family in NZ.

Some ousters are spectacularly missing the point

I don’t zip my lip! Why would we. At our age we shouldn’t need too especially as we have worked so hard for the benefit of our children and Grandchildren. Today’s parents are offended too easily! I’m in my 70’s. 💐

Quite simply, it’s me time 😃 doing what I like, when I like

I am definitely not seen as the matriarch of the family. I was heavily involved with looking after the grandchildren but now they are grown up I rarely see them or their parents. My son phones us once a week, from the car on the way home from work. For many years I was also a carer to my mother but that has ended now. So I lead my own life, doing what I want to do while I can still do it. But in all honestly, I do wish it was different,

I do not have much family left, but I do have some very good friends, whom I keep in touch with. Those who live nearby I see regularly, those who live farther away, I email or phone.

I am still healthy enough to do my own housework and shopping and some gardening (never a hobby of mine). I write academic articles in my field still, volunteer in a couple of local organisations and try to be an active member of my parish.

I shall be 80 next year – and am thankful to be fairly fit and active and have a mind I keep active by volunteering to do accounts for a local busy charity. Most people this age – I find – are on Transmit -- rarely on Receive! Listening to others is just as interesting as telling others yours – but I find most people aren't interested – so I just listen and smile and continue to enjoy my life the way I enjoy it.
I think health has a lot to do with contenment in later life.

Tuliptree

Some ousters are spectacularly missing the point

I think you are right!

I would be doing all these lovely things - holidays etc. - if I were able. Most of the things I really enjoy are very very hard to achieve now: walks, singing, days out, going to concerts etc. I can plan nothing because I do not even know if I will have the breath to hold a conversation.

When these abilities vanish, that is when we have to ask what is the point?