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Christmas presents..

(61 Posts)
humptydumpty Thu 12-Oct-17 17:28:10

From the BBC today:

Should we all impose a one-gift rule at Christmas?

Hollywood stars Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are implementing a "one-gift" rule this Christmas for their two young children so they don't grow up spoiled.

Sounds like a very good idea to me - what do other GNers think?

phoenix Thu 12-Oct-17 17:56:08

My mother would buy the boys loads of presents (on top of what we/Father Christmas brought), just for the pleasure of watching them open them!

It was me that then had to find space to put it all.confused

maryeliza54 Thu 12-Oct-17 18:01:26

Do they mean one gift from one person or one gift in total.

paddyann Thu 12-Oct-17 20:00:21

I love giving presents ,dont care if I never get any but I spend a lot of time finding the perfect gifts for 25 family and friends no this is not for me .I'll continue to "spoil" the people I love for as long as I can .I only have OH's to buy .everything will be wrapped and ready to go by November .

humptydumpty Thu 12-Oct-17 20:02:53

phoenix I so agree! seriously though, I do think it's a good idea not to shower children with presents and I think the idea is that they don't get more than one present from each present. paddyann dare I suggest the giving is more in your interest than the receivers'? (ducks!!)

tanith Thu 12-Oct-17 20:06:38

An excellent idea, we already do secret santa for all the grown ups in our family, it's a big weight of everyone minds to be honest. Choosing and affording numerous presents had become a chore/difficult for some family members so we had a discussion and everyone agreed it was the right thing for our family.
For the smaller ones we buy them some gifts and also a cheque to go into savings.

BBbevan Thu 12-Oct-17 20:18:54

Lovely idea. My DGs get so much that you can't see the floor for paper. The younger one goes. - rip open, look,comment, then next. Sad really after all the thought that has been put in to buying the presents.
Think I might talk to all in the family about one present, but does it mean one present from FC, plus one from GPS, plus one from aunts etc?

phoenix Thu 12-Oct-17 20:38:00

My ex husbands family (MIL, and 2 SIL) would buy us things that I would actually dread opening! (I still shudder at the thought of the brown sherry glasses, and the awful tiger and lion pictures that she bought from a door to door salesman, and the least said about the pineapple shaped multi dish thing for serving curry accompaniments the better, the fact that each piece was separately wrapped only added to the sense of impending disappointment, but at least gave us time to compose our faces)

And of course I would be tasked with buying presents for them. Oh joy.

I took the bull by the horns one year, and said that we should not buy each other presents, we should only buy for the children, as in under 12.

I was looked at as if I was the Grinch, or Jacob Marley! But it worked.

OMG, I have just remembered, apart from the sherry glasses and the awful pictures, there were the jumpers........

M0nica Thu 12-Oct-17 21:34:33

But that doesn't deal with the problem when the excess of presents is caused by the number of people giving them rather than the number given by one individual.

We have always sought direction from our DS and DDiL over present buying and the usual pattern in our family is 2 presents, 1 of them something quite simple, like a book BUT DGC were born when their parents were in their very late 30s/40s and the majority of people in their social group are childless and as the only children in the group DGC are getting presents from about 10 people other than immediate family.

ninathenana Thu 12-Oct-17 21:53:19

paddyann 25 shockshock I'm not sure if I'm jealous of that many family and friends or relieved.
I only have H, S, D and partner. I will add to GC savings account in the hope one day I can give it to them. I did used to buy them 4-5 presents each when we were still able to see them.

I'm guilty of having bought our children far too many presents each when they were young. They would have a main present and lots of "bits". My mum was as bad. We used to save some for after lunch the pile was that big.

paddyann Fri 13-Oct-17 00:55:16

ninathenanaI always check with my children what the GC would like GD1 has decided on mainly clothes this years so thats what she'll get ,I even got photos of her ppreferencec from my daughter,I usually buy their shoes and boots and coats for winter anyway so I know she'll wear what I buy.My GS is 15 and he'll get some clothes and some money and the two wee girls willl get toys ...also from a list from their mums .I love Christmas always start early and used to make 10 christmas cakes to go to family as well as their gifts now my daughter has taken over that job .I'm happy to buy for people and my family are happy to receive so as long as I'm not expecting anyone else to finance it its none of their business .

phoenix Fri 13-Oct-17 01:15:09

I seem to remember one wise GN member posting something along the lines of "something to wear, something they need, something they want, and something to read".

Grandma2213 Fri 13-Oct-17 01:52:47

I always buy socks, underpants and a bottle of spirits for my DSs . Unfortunately their choice is now designer, and very expensive alcohol. I also try to produce something personal, witty and free/cheap! The old imagination is beginning to fail on this one though!

My own close family gave up on presents years ago but DGC have huge expectations. I tend to get 'activity' presents and games that all the family can play. The disgusting and messy ones are usually most popular.

I buy bits on offer as I see them but then forget and find that one child has more as we get near to Christmas and so I have to even them out!!

I also spend hours wrapping knickers, socks T shirts, leggings, pyjamas and things to wear that they need, to make a 'pile'!! Cheap books also feature!

By the way they all spend different parts of Christmas day with me and their Dads as this is their second/third home. Also the presents also stay here as Mummies might throw them away and they trust me to keep them safe for ever! The space in my house is gradually shrinking! Never mind, thank goodness for small mercies (*paddyann*) .... nobody here likes Christmas cake!! grin

Coconut Fri 13-Oct-17 10:08:24

So agree with cutting down as most kids get far too much. We always recycle loads to the “ Love in a Box” charity, my grandchildren are more than happy to donate.

JCFrance Fri 13-Oct-17 10:16:27

I always ask my daughter for GDs. I remember my son getting 2 rubix? clocks one Christmas. The idea posted by Phoenix is brilliant, I may follow that one in future.

Craftycat Fri 13-Oct-17 10:30:31

Thank you Phoenix- loved it!
I remember the Christmasses of the red polo necked jumpers! DS1 bought me one for Christmas & I said how much I liked it - well you do don't you!
I got the same thing for the next 4 years with slight variations of red colours. I have no idea where he kept getting them from! I cannot wear anything touching my neck or I get so hot I can pass out but I dutifully wore them if he was coming round. I couldn't bring myself to tell him. THEN he got married & DDiL took over present buying & hooray- lovely presents. DS2 is married to a shopaholic & the things she buys me are amazing.
Thank heavens for DDiLs!!!

MissAdventure Fri 13-Oct-17 10:32:57

I would be overjoyed to pare Christmas down to sensible proportions, across the board. I find the whole thing very distasteful, on the whole.

dizzygran Fri 13-Oct-17 10:39:04

I agree - I buy one large present for my adult children and GC and usually give them one small fun item each. I exchange small gifts with a few friends and send money to the younger nephews and nieces. I stopped exchanging gifts with others a while ago.

TellNo1Ok Fri 13-Oct-17 10:41:40

Our youngest g-child is 19 and at Uni.... at a recent family meal we all agreed to a "secret Santa" Christmas... everyone took a name from a pile... and promised to SECRETLY buy one pressie for that person for £50.00 ...

As we usually buy for 10 close family spending probably at least £50 each, this is a considerable difference...

So at Christmas everyone will have one pressie instead of up to 10 ...
And I'll also buy everyone tree pressies...

I'll let you know how it goes after Christmas...

BRedhead59 Fri 13-Oct-17 10:45:04

My son has declared one present for his three children - normally I would buy a book, an item of clothing and a toy + some silly stuff for stockings. My wings are clipped it is his kids and he's in charge.

ValC Fri 13-Oct-17 11:06:28

It's not only Christmas Day now is it, they now get 'Christmas Eve Boxes', what is that all about, don't they get enough on Christmas Day?
I opened an account for my grandchildren when they were born and have put in every month since, even though I am now retired. Hopefully by the time they reach university age they will have a bit of extra money. Because of these accounts I have always limited the amount of money I spend on them at Christmas and Birthdays. They are at an age now when they understand and love the idea they have a bank account.

lovebeigecardigans1955 Fri 13-Oct-17 11:09:20

I agree. We live in a world of plenty. One big gift from parents and smaller stocking fillers (though this definition has changed over the years) from others.
Children can be so mercenary these days. BIL told me that his step-grandson (if that is correct) waits until his younger half-sister has opened her presents (and discreetly counts them) then he opens his own, hoping that he has more - which I'm sure is the case as his own dad and stepmother also indulge him.

Legs55 Fri 13-Oct-17 11:33:05

I buy one or two larger presents for DGS1 (aged 7) & lots of stocking fillers, always one or two books, no Christmas or Birthday is complete without a book or two from Nansmile

DGS2 (will be 7 months) will probably get clothes, a toy or two, a couple of books & stocking.

DD & her OH will get small gifts of chocolate, I select their favourites as they both like different types & money unless they request something special.

My DM (nearly 89), well the most difficult but I am going to visit soon & we will probably go shopping, I have thought of a practical present from my DD & family. Last year they bought me 2 roller blinds that I wanted + some little bits. I love spoiling people but I think a few well chosen, thoughtful presents are most appreciated.

suzied Fri 13-Oct-17 11:44:26

We do secret Santa for the 12 grown ups in the family using
Makes life so much easier.

Nanabilly Fri 13-Oct-17 11:57:01

I'm afraid I am one of those who over indulge at Christmas and spend way too much money on my sons and their partners and gs's but I love it. I am not happy unless everyone has a huge pile to open and I have great pleasure watching them open them.