Gransnet forums

Christmas

For those of you who are alone,lonely or worried.

(33 Posts)
silversurf Mon 25-Dec-17 10:39:34

Seasons greetings and try to have a peaceful and relaxed day.
Bless you all.

Anniebach Mon 25-Dec-17 10:43:00

How kind x. I will be alone, well , have my dogs, I am hoping my sisters will text but know they will not, strange not talking to them on Christmas Day.

Christinefrance Mon 25-Dec-17 10:51:13

Have a peaceful day Anniebach the dogs will keep you busy and be a comfort.

sunseeker Mon 25-Dec-17 11:36:17

I am also alone today - but will be remembering all the wonderful Christmas' spent with DH. Merry Christmas to everyone. tchsmile

NanKate Mon 25-Dec-17 11:51:06

Hope your day turns out better than you expect. Keep warm and eat as many chocs as you like 😉

Love from NanKate x

OldMeg Mon 25-Dec-17 11:57:49

Yes, sending hopeful wishes for a better than expected day too 🎄

Charleygirl Mon 25-Dec-17 16:00:44

I also am on my own- my cat decided to go out at the crack of dawn and will not appear for hours. My oven has broken down so my food had to be re- organised. At least it is not cold although it is fairly dull here.

Three friends have rung me and others have sent emails.

Fennel Mon 25-Dec-17 16:37:15

Thinking of all of you who are on your own - you've always got friends here on Gransnet.
As above (*NanKate*) keep warm! It's well below freezing outside here.

NanKate Mon 25-Dec-17 18:02:34

Sorry Charleygirl to hear about your oven. Hope you have got a toaster, perhaps a cheese toastie with cranberries would go down well with a nice glass of something.

Hope you are all ok and have got your feet up in front of the IPad, telly or book.

Nelliemoser Mon 25-Dec-17 22:23:40

Feeling miserable. OH has wandered off to his room Been there since about half past six. House still not organised. He was doing it and wandered off.
It needs the second bathroom to be cleaner for guests.
OH not really helping he keeps wandering off. Reading me the Radio Times or talking to me without giving me any clues who or what he is referring to,he gets stroppy if I have to ask.
DD and kids and my grown up son are supposed to be coming on Wednesday if the little one is OK . I have no idea when they might arrive which messes up planning my cooking and all in all feeling stressed lonely and fed up. Having a bad time of late I must stop moaning. I need a kick up the backside.

Ambergirl Mon 25-Dec-17 22:36:06

Nelliemoser hope things perk up and you get sorted and feel better soon. The festive season really can be very stressful. I just wish people would make a plan and stick to it....
A moan on here is always allowed....perhaps have a glass of your favourite tipple!! Good Luck

Anniebach Mon 25-Dec-17 22:47:25

No Nellie , you do not need a kiss up the backside, you need a hug, you are not moaning, you need to unload and we are here to listen and care x

Chewbacca Mon 25-Dec-17 22:47:44

Sorry to hear things are rough for you today Nelliemoser. Please don't stress about bathrooms being spic and span; I'm sure your DD and family won't be bothered. Easy for me to say, I know but guests rarely see the "wrong bits" that we fret about. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you. And no, the last thing you need is a kick up the back side! Have these instead flowers

lovebeigecardigans1955 Tue 26-Dec-17 10:19:18

It sounds as though you have a lot to moan about Nelliemoser so vent away on here. We all get so uptight about the Christmas season - I'm sure most visitors wouldn't notice that the bathroom isn't perfect and should surely understand that you have a lot on your plate. Put your feet up for a bit - you deserve it.

Lolly69 Tue 26-Dec-17 11:47:23

First Christmas without my dear mother who recently passed away. Brother doesn't speak to us (don't ask why) so just myself, DH and dog in a new place where we know few people. But guess what? Went to church in the morning and we had a simply lovely day (which was unexpected to say the least). Lovely nephew and niece phoned as did lovely cousins, we had a lunch we really enjoyed, watched 2 films (one excellent one rubbish), just chilled. So to everyone, especially those on their own or (like me) a bit low I send heartfelt seasons greetings and the hope that 2018 is better for you than 2017 was.

Anniebach Tue 26-Dec-17 12:14:45

Not a happy day. Son in law and grandchildren called in the Morning which was lovely but made me more aware of the gap my beloved daughter has left , youngest grandchild is so like her, I held it together untill they left.

No word from my sisters so no hope there now.

OldMeg Tue 26-Dec-17 12:27:22

How long since the rift with your sisters Anniebach?

Saggi Tue 26-Dec-17 13:04:56

Here’s a thought anniebach....why wait for your sisters to call or text you...why don’t you call or text them?? My husbands the same , he will never make the first move!! Are you the eldest of your siblings by any chance?

Overthehills Tue 26-Dec-17 13:08:29

Hello Annie. I think you’re being so brave at the moment, I’m sure I wouldn’t manage to get out of bed never mind hold anything together. I thought of you yesterday and hoped it would at least be bearable. Sending hugs and prayers and flowers.

Elrel Tue 26-Dec-17 13:51:54

Christmas Day is my daughter’s birthday. With son in law and their 3 teenage sons we spent it opening presents, eating a lovely salad lunch, and playing board games. If that sounds quiet I assure it wasn’t! Plenty of yelling, teasing, and bursts of laughter plus various people’s chosen styles of music, not even always one at a time!
All very smooth ...
Ssshhh - just slipping out for the bxxxxday cxkx I overlooked 🙄

Elrel Tue 26-Dec-17 13:58:30

And I enjoyed a glass or 3 of bubbles and a whisky nightcap courtesy of SiL!
My reason for posting was to offer warm hugs, virtual tea ☕️ and, above all, heartfelt sympathy to all those whose Christmas Day was, for any reason, sad, stressed or lonely.
Wishing everyone good things in 2018.

Anniebach Tue 26-Dec-17 14:16:23

Would like help re my sisters. They stopped speaking to me in January, my daughter was in hospital, a nephew opened a chat room on Facebook and all the family joined. I discovered they were talking about her problems, physical and mental, the state of her home. There were nieces and nephews there who never visit her in hospital or at home, and two of my sisters. Not one has never offered help and support with grandchildren. I was cross and told my nephew they could all sod off out of that room. When my daughter died, still silence, same with the funeral though they turned up. I contacted a sister about ten days ago to ask something I needed to get right for my statement for the inquest. She replied, said she felt guilty she hadn't contacted me when my daughter died. I said why be so cruel since January over two words. She said ' so you didn't say when told I was going to clean her house what is that nosey bitch going there for and when told my daughter was in the chat room what has it got to do with that bastard from Plymouth '
I was badly shocked, the nephew who opened the chat room told them. I told her what I had said , sod off from that room.

I did not say those awful things , that sister is my favourite too.

Still silence, baffled because they know I don't use that language . Would never call her a bitch, would have been grateful she was going to get the house ready because I was going to pay a cleaner which I couldn't really afford and call my niece a bastard? Never,never,never. They all know I dislike swearing.

So that's it. I sent a message to nephew asking why he said such lies, he replied 'never contact me again, I am cutting you off.' what hurts is he went through a period of deep depression when his first marriage ended, I sat with him every day for several months. He told people then I had saved his life. Heard recently he is to marry wife no 3, having dumped wife no 2, mother of his three lovely daughters. I can only think he has a mental health problem , but how can they believe I would say such awful things,

Yes I am the eldest, have been the one to help them all when they had problems. I can forgive then but cannot forget this hurt, I needed them , first time ever.

Sorry, an epistle again, this has been haunting me for two weeks. My brother who wasn't in that chat room is shocked as is his wife .

OldMeg Tue 26-Dec-17 14:36:51

Sounds like your nephew is the source of all the trouble. Could you enlist the help of your brother perhaps to build bridges? He probably knows already what your just told us. Tell him again and ask for his help perhaps?

Camelotclub Tue 26-Dec-17 14:39:09

Nellie
if you ask me it's your DD who needs a kick, not you! Fancy not knowing when they're due to arrive.

sluttygran Tue 26-Dec-17 18:23:58

I spent today alone, after expecting to spend it with DS, DIL, DD and assorted DGC.
Everyone has fallen prey to various ‘lurgies’, so we agreed to have a mini- Christmas in a couple of weeks or so when everyone feels better.
To be honest, I’m quite relieved, as trying to be a jolly hostess when everyone is under the weather is very trying!
I’ve had a quiet pottering sort of day and just nibbled what I fancy, so it was pleasant and not at all lonely.
I think it made me realise that Christmas is just a few ordinary days with extraordinary expectations of company, joy and feasting. Like any other days, things can and do go wrong, especially when you assemble a collection of dyspeptic relatives, over-excited children and quantities of ‘seasonal spirit’!
Hugs and love to those of you who are genuinely alone and lonely - may you find warmth and company. To those like me, having an unexpected oasis of peace amidst all the forced jollity, enjoy the tranquillity before New Year celebrations catch you amidships!