Christmas holidays

Why not take a day trip to Salzburg. An hour away isn't too bad.

I'd say a great big yes and join Maw's jolly party!

Maswbroonsback Me too I just cannot imagine not wanting to be with my lovely family at any time.

My husband and I went skiing with a church group at New Year. We were 64 and 63, and had never skied before. We had a fabulous time learning to ski on 4 days and going off by ourselves for 3 days. It was to Switzerland, not Austria, but we took the ski lifts up into the mountains and saw wonderful scenery. At the end of the holiday we could ski a bit, after falling over loads of times! Hotel rather basic but it was in town, and the town was all full of decorations and little stalls selling all sorts of interesting things. We agreed it was one of the best holidays we had ever had. Just wrap up warm and go intending to enjoy yourself and your family. You may not get the chance again.

In addition, I'm going to NY in the autumn with DD, her DH and DGC. I will be paying an equal share of the accommodation, food etc. I will do some childminding, but they know that I have an itinerary of my own.

It will be lovely. Ski-ing isn't compulsory. You can stay indoors in the beautifully decorated hotel and admire the great outdoors from inside. Go! I'll go if you don't want to!

See Sara65,s answer.

I wonder if I could ski in my wheelchair? That would be amazing fun. I would love to go. Usually it’s the places we think that will be awful that are actually most fun and entertaining.
Would you want to do Christmas lunch for one? Miss out on seeing the grandchildren?

I hate being cold, but with really good thermals under your clothes you’ll be fine.
It’s generally not the nasty slippy slides type snow but the softer fluffier snow that compacts underfoot and isn’t slippery.

Good luck making your decision, though it does sound as though you’ve convinced yourself that you’ll hate it. X

Family ski holidays are the best thing! You don’t have to ski!! So many lovely things to enjoy and a marvellous experience. In the nicest way - don’t let your perception of what it will be like stop you. Good advice here from people who have actually done it and know what they’re talking about. Please go and let us know how you get on.

Oh go! You will have a fantastic time. No need to ski. It will be so beautiful. Don't miss the opportunity. You will love it.

Hello amt101. Is the only reason you don't want to go because you don't ski or like walking on slippery surfaces? If so, be reassured that the streets in Austria are usually cleared and there is no need to ski at all. If, on the other hand, you don't like the idea of spending the time with your family then of course don't go.

Personally I love spending time with my family and we holiday together at least once every year. One of our most magical holidays was a Christmas holiday in Norway where we stayed in a self-catering log cabin and the snow outside was impressively deep - and although I don't like walking on it either, I have to say that the whole ambience was wonderful beyond description. Being together with the family outweighed any considerations about walking in the snow - and I left the skiing to those who enjoy it!

I'm with Sara65, I'm quite happy to stay at home and wouldn't feel as if I was missing out at all.

It is many years since I have been skiing and probably would not do it at my age but I think I would go on the holiday for the festive atmosphere, I think it will be memorable.
In years to come the family will talk about the year we did skiing at Christmas.

If you don't want to go, say so politely. Presumably the family knows of your dislike of snow and cold and know you do not ski, nor intend to try it.

It's not your problem that your one adult daughter will be on her own if you don't go. She is presumably capable of making friends there.

We skied every year for ten years and I dont think I was cold once. Ski resorts are not like Britain. The snow is dry, crisp and powdery and the indoor spaces are usually heated up to about 80 degrees. Invariably we slept with the windows open all night, being used to British houses in the winter. The scenery is breathtaking and many resorts have winter walks, toboggan rides, spas and swimming pools. Some even have rock bands and outdoor markets with hot punch, roast chesnuts and plenty of shopping. It really is picture postcard. If it were me I would go like a shot, providing I was not expected to cook for everyone of course.

I wish I could babysit my grand daughter. Good luck,whatever you decide.

Thank them for suggesting it but please don’t go.

Enjoy your Christmas at home and treat yourself to something nice .

As it is a ski resort there might well be staff at the chalet to cook meals, clean and have tea and cake on the table for returning skiers.

Christmas at a ski resort is wonderful even if you don’t ski. Sitting in a deckchair in snow with hot chocolate in your hand watching your family ski is wonderful as is swimming in a very warm outdoor pool surrounded by snow and mountains. I am so envious AMT101.
Others have mentioned being “ used “ to babysit. I can’t understand the downside to that unless the children’s parents are planning going out every night and leaving you with the children. The reality with a ski holiday is very busy days, early dinner and early night to prepare for the next wonderful day.

amt101

I notice that a lot of people are trying to persuade you to go because it is something they would like rather than thinking about you and reading what you actually said.

I think MissAdventure is right! If you don't want to go you should not feel under any obligation to go. Your DGD who cannot ski will be looked after in turn by her family, surely? Personally I think a family with a child in her position is selfish to take her away on a skiing holiday for themselves at Christmas, knowing she will be left out of the main reason for the holiday and will not be part of the family group. Were they hoping you would come so that you could look after her? That is despicable! To make you feel guilty and force you into making a journey to a place you do not want to go for Christmas because of their selfish neglect of their disabled daughter and their selfish desire to go skiing. How dreadful!

I think the only thing MissAdventure might have overlooked is that, for you, it is not "that simple". Trying to say "No thanks, I won't be coming." to your family is difficult. I think actually it needs to be simple though! Your children need to respect you and understand that, like all of us here, we are the older generation and have different needs and feelings. Please follow your own feelings and do not go. If you feel as I do, say that they are being unfair to the non-skiing child to book a Christmas skiing holiday in which she cannot take part and will be left out of the group.

Wishing you all the best and good luck when you tell them. Just hold your ground, don't be dragged into a long explanation about why you do not want to go, just repeat the same "I prefer to stay at home for Christmas this time." If you start saying why you prefer it, they will just knock down yours answers, so don't give them reasons as to why you prefer not to go.
Good luck!

Apologies - I said "DGD" not youngest Daughter who cannot ski due to health problems.

I love travelling so I would go! However I would say from the outset that you are happy to do your fair share of cooking etc (assuming they haven’t hired a chalet girl?) but plan to relax and do your own thing a lot too.
I also would be wary that you will turn into a free child minder for the holiday! So probably, as someone else suggested, tactfully raise the issue of your holiday expectations as well as what they are expecting. Someone up thread optimistically said you would “be waited on hand and foot!” I would probably not think this likely, but certainly it would be your holiday as well and so you should get a say in how it pans out.
I think Christmas in Austria will be fantastic and as others have said you could pop on the train to Salzburg and enjoy the Christmas markets!

I would go in a heartbeat but as it isn't going to happen, I can only dream.

As you get on well with everybody and it doesn't sound as if they are expecting you to ski you can curl up there with a good book and a glass of something as easily as you can at home. Its Christmas surely any childminding doesn't have to be too heavy. So many grans on here would love the opportunity. As so often other countries deal with cold and snow so much better than we do. An hours drive is really nothing.

My advice is to trust your "gut" feelings. Don't be pressured into agreeing, if it's not what you want to do. I think that family holidays can be great but also that they can be quite stressful! (I speak from experience, including that of DH & I going as non-skiers on a family skiing holiday.)

There is a lot of conflicting advice but my bet is that out of all the comments someone will have said exactly the right thing and you will feel much better for having read everything ,amt101.
There are other things to think about when going away with other folk - even family .What time do they like to get up in a morning?
Will they be offended if you want to go to bed earlier than them?
What happens if you just feel like curling up and reading a good book?
Will they feel bad if they want to go out to eat and you feel like staying in and eating alone?
You are probably much younger than me but not being used to being with a lot of people daily nowadays I get tired when I am involved in too much conversation.
If you had no doubts at all about going you would not have posted your email.
Please yourself.
You can say no ,you know.
I really don’t think this applies to you but it may to me if I were involved in a similar situation .....
Had I been invited and said no I don’t think my family would lose sleep over it.
They might well feel relieved that I didn’t want to go with them but feel that they had to ask me first so that I wasn’t upset that I hadn’t been invited.