I have flu and I want to cancel Christmas

As neither of you are well just explain that you aren't up to entertaining this year.
For so many people there will be a lot of preparation. You need to look after yourselves before others when you a ill.

Tell the truth to everyone.

Trust that your family can sort out what's needed., and that the very worst than could happen is "the two of us, having a cosy recovery day"

You dont have to force yourselves to go through it xxx

Just say you cant host Christmas this year as as you are unwell ...

Tell them Katya, there's still plenty of time for them to make alternative arrangements.

Just tell them you are ill and can not do it this year.

Then after Christmas tell them that age and infirmity are catchingup with you and you cannt manage another Christmas - and stick to that. Then everyone has a year to work out what to do next Christmas.

The only thing is I know my husband will want to go ahead with it. He is very much in denial about his age and what we can manage. He is forever taking on too much and making himself unwell in the process.

Why not say that they can all come as usual but they have to do all the cooking, cleaning up and prep? Tell them you have the flu, feel terrible and can’t manage it this year but do want to see them?

You can host but they do all the work?

Why do you do everything yourselves anyway in a normal year. Delegate . Share preparation and food provision between the family. On the day allocated jobs, even the little ones can do something.
This year explain that you are not well enough. Hopefully they will pull their weight, if not , shame on them.

A couple of years ago I had to cancel Christmas at our house as I needed to look after my mum who was really poorly with norovirus.

I was so proud of the way they all just pulled together, looked after my OH, and made sure everyone had a good time.
We arranged a family zoom meeting which was great, if rather chaotic.
My contribution was the red cabbage which I had prepared a frozen, the rest of the family just rolled up their sleeves and got stuck in with doing the rest.

Hope your family come up trumps too - don’t feel guilty about giving them the chance.

If your family are worth their salt, then they will rise to the occasion. You may well be feeling considerably better in 2 weeks time (Christmas Day), but, you’ll be feeling weakened by the effects of having had ‘flu, so you need to speak to your family now, and tell them that, if the celebration is to go ahead at your house then they are going to have to “muck in”, ie, bring things they have prepared so that the onus is not on you and your DH alone. One could sort out the starters, another could bring the veg all prepared, another could bring the turkey or other meat and another could sort out dessert.
You’ve got six adult children, between them they could take on one of the courses, leaving you to set the table, provide drink and nibbles. Discuss it with them now, and also say that this is how following years are going to have to be if they come to you, as it’s just too much for you and your husband to do alone even though the mind of both of you is willing. I’m afraid age has its effects - we tire, we slow down, so it’s time to do a bit of delegating. They might even relish the opportunity.

I don't agree with telling your family that they can come and do all the work. If you're feeling unwell, you will probably not be in the mood for enforced jollity, and why would the family want to expose themselves to a possible flu virus?

KatyaStrings

The only thing is I know my husband will want to go ahead with it. He is very much in denial about his age and what we can manage. He is forever taking on too much and making himself unwell in the process.

KatyaStrings, you can say "no" to your husband. He's just going to make himself - or/and you - even iller by insisting on going ahead.

You have a right for your wishes to be respected, for in this case they are entirely sensible and realistic.

sorry to hear that you're feeling rotten with this flu, your family will understand...I told my family that I wasn't making any more xmas dinners as it was too much for me now ...I'm over 80 and so is OH,,,I don't mind ordering the food as long as they dish it up,,,that's the bit that takes it out of me...so this year the dinner will still be at our house,but we will be waited on. Flu takes time to get over, you'll probably still feel weak and won't feel much like entertaining, hope you feel better soon

Have you had flu before? I have had it a few times over my long life and no way would I consider a family gathering while recovering. For one thing it puts a pressure on you that you don’t want as that in itself is counter productive to recovery. Tell them that this year you are not up to entertaining as the flu has knocked you out.

Take Christmas off. Put yourselves front and centre this year. Your family will understand. You’ll still be loved.

Let everyone know tomorrow. They’ve still plenty of time to arrange things. Help a little with finances (buy their turkey crowns?) if you feel they need help last minute? After all you won’t be hosting so not buying a mountain of food.

I read somewhere we ought to heed or gut feelings more.

As my lovely late mother in law used to say “Please others and you displease yourself”.

Send the guest a list of nearby restaurants/hotels and say " We're unable to host and guests or meals for xmas this year. If anyone wants to get together, they will need to book themselves a hotel.

If any or all of you want to get together on Christmas day for lunch, one of you needs to finalise the numbers, agree a time, book a restaurant table and let us know.

It’s another 12 days to go, you’ll feel ok by then.Just ask the family to pull their weight at your house on the day, telling them you haven’t been well.

Do what Ziplok suggests. It sounds as if you are the only one with the space for everyone to be together, but they are adults and they can bring, and cook, the dinner. Your DH will still feel he is hosting and you can both relax as you will still be feeling below par after the flu. I hope you soon feel better.

Oreo

It’s another 12 days to go, you’ll feel ok by then.Just ask the family to pull their weight at your house on the day, telling them you haven’t been well.

Mine has only just started - my husband is very healthy and he's been laid low with it for a week and still not great. I have vasculitis which can make recovery more difficult.

If you have a dose of real flu then you will be nowhere near well enough by the 25th. I had flu a couple or so years ago and I was so ill, and absolutely floored for about 3 weeks, then after that took ages to recover my stamina and strength.

Keep well, drink loads and rest! Follow what your body tells you. But rest, rest and then rest again.

Get well soon.

Whitewavemark2

If you have a dose of real flu then you will be nowhere near well enough by the 25th. I had flu a couple or so years ago and I was so ill, and absolutely floored for about 3 weeks, then after that took ages to recover my stamina and strength.

Keep well, drink loads and rest! Follow what your body tells you. But rest, rest and then rest again.

Get well soon.

It's real flu, I am certain of it! I've had it before and felt drained for a couple of months.

KatyaStrings

Whitewavemark2

If you have a dose of real flu then you will be nowhere near well enough by the 25th. I had flu a couple or so years ago and I was so ill, and absolutely floored for about 3 weeks, then after that took ages to recover my stamina and strength.

Keep well, drink loads and rest! Follow what your body tells you. But rest, rest and then rest again.

Get well soon.

It's real flu, I am certain of it! I've had it before and felt drained for a couple of months.

I meant to say thank you for the advice and get well wishes ☺️

Smintie

Why not say that they can all come as usual but they have to do all the cooking, cleaning up and prep? Tell them you have the flu, feel terrible and can’t manage it this year but do want to see them?

You can host but they do all the work?

This.
We buy all food etc, home delivered, they cook it.

If you truly have the Flu you'll both be flat on your backs, barely able to lift your heads off the pillow.
Plus, why would you want to infect everyone else.