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It's already depressing me

(158 Posts)
Madwoman11 Sun 15-Mar-20 17:45:34

Everyone's plans are being cancelled, and it is already effecting my mood. I had so many things to look forward to, but all organised events and classes are being cancelled.
Top that with age and health related restrictions which will probably have many of us prisoners, and it's looking like a long lonely year ahead.
I'm a very motivated person, but it will be no fun if you live alone especially. As the weather warms up I will enjoy sitting outside, and perhaps organise family bbqs etc.
At the moment Spring cleaning is getting done, but I have to say I'm already bored.

Franbern Sun 15-Mar-20 18:14:18

Madwoman11, I am in total sympathy and agreement with you. I am far more frightened of the effect of four month (?) of this sort of isolation, than I am of actually catching this illness. Isolation has always been used as a dreadful punishment, even torture - yet we oldies are being told to do this.
Do not even have any spring cleaning to do.....only having moved into my flat a few months back, everywhere is clean and tidy to a fault. Carpet has been vacuumed almost to death!!! Lots recorded on tv, but cannot spend all day, every day watching that.
Have been so looking forward to better weather, and being to get out and about even more - now that appears not going to happen. Yes, I am also already bored.

M0nica Sun 15-Mar-20 23:03:20

I think the mental illness price of the shut down could be more than the cost of the virus itself. I think there may be suicides and possibly murders, certainly a long tail of depression and other mental problems.

Thankfully I have enough research projects, reading,needlework, decorating and gardening to do for boredom to be a problem, but I do really feel for those immured in flats.

lilypollen Sun 15-Mar-20 23:47:40

Thanks for starting this topic as it totally echoes my feelings, so glad I'm not alone. The mental toll hasn't even been mentioned and I agree it may be great. I have a DH but if we are together 24/7 for god knows how long it could be divorce at the end. He's 70 and I'm not but I probably wouldn't venture out.

grannyactivist Mon 16-Mar-20 00:18:55

If people are very concerned about loneliness, perhaps some kind of online 'chat' room might be helpful. I know nothing about them at all except that they exist, but a quick search brought this link up:

Coolgran65 Mon 16-Mar-20 02:25:19

In my working life I worked in a solicitors office and it was well accepted that busiest times for matrimonial work were just after Christmas and just after the summer holidays. The factor being couples spending longer time together than usual..

Add in that it's not possible to get away from each other it can be a recipe for disaster.

I envisage some unhappy households.

NfkDumpling Mon 16-Mar-20 07:07:49

DH is already depressed at the prospect. He’s not one to chat on the phone. I don’t see him (or us) surviving four months unscathed!

Pantglas2 Mon 16-Mar-20 08:11:30

I do have lots of things planned which are having to be cancelled and am a little downhearted- depressed is too strong a word at the moment!

However I’m trying to do one lovely thing each day to have something to look forward to and today it’s changing the bed - I love a fresh bed and am so looking forward to slipping between the sheets tonight!

I enjoy cooking and am planning some lovely meals/treats over the next few days and will just generally ‘tidy’ up my life/garden/home/paperwork so that when this is all over we can resume jollifications!

Greymar Mon 16-Mar-20 08:16:27

Maybe GN could set up a phone tree ( I believe its called? )

Whitewavemark2 Mon 16-Mar-20 08:19:01

I think that people will be surprised at how well they will cope and will have inner strength that they didn’t realise they had.

Mobilise everything you can think of to help you in this period of isolation including us on here?

We could set up a thread in particular for those who are on their own and we could all ensure that someone is always ready to chat etc.

I’m sure others have more imaginative ideas than me.

Whitewavemark2 Mon 16-Mar-20 08:19:53

There you are - a phone tree whatever that is - does it come with money?

aggie Mon 16-Mar-20 08:25:37

I have a crochet project on the go , but I am so jittery that I can’t do more than a few stitches at a time ?

M0nica Mon 16-Mar-20 08:35:24

There is nothing to stop flat dwellers going for walks, as long as they keep away from other people.

Doing this will be easier for those in rural areas, but with the days getting longer and mornings lighter, there is nothing to stop people going for a walk first thing in the morning, before 7.00am in most areas when few people will be up and about.

In the summer months when the light mornings wake me, I am sometimes up and out by 5.30. I rarely if ever see anyone and everything looks so much better in the light of early morning.

Grammaretto Mon 16-Mar-20 09:00:08

I self isolated yesterday afternoon and that was enough for me. I quickly became bored with the TV, radio, knitting, newspaper and my book.
I also became increasingly annoyed with our AC who texted us on the family whatsapp with a mixture of horror stories and "instructions/advice" for how we must stay in and yet somehow look out for their DGP who really are old.

I will go on the U3A walk as it's a lovely day and I am not unwell - yet.

So many plans have had to be cancelled, we will just have to make the most of what we are able to do. and hope it isn't for too long.
Some shops were going to open specially for us "elderly" for an hour or two, maybe first thing?.

Urmstongran Mon 16-Mar-20 09:03:29

It’s very strange here in Spain on lockdown. We are in a small apartment. The door to the gardens is locked - no communal gatherings. Yes a walk to the supermarket or pharmacy is allowed. But once inside it’s strange.

TV, radio, reading. FaceTime yesterday to family in the U.K. phone calls.

Looking at one another 24/7 will be a test. If either of us coughs (and who hasn’t got an occasional tickly cough at this time of year!) the other looks over.... is this anything?

Measured eating. We don’t want to have to go to the supermarket unless we need to. Simple meals. Scrambled eggs on toast (for dinner haha! Not breakfast! - that was cereal to save on the bread, with a yoghurt and fruit). We only have a fridge with an icebox, no freezer - but a supermarket over the road out here is usually ‘our larder’.

I might learn to play cards. Or break open the Scrabble. Day 2 out of 15.

We have malt whiskey, gin, wine and beers.

They are necessary, trust me ...

Anniebach Mon 16-Mar-20 09:05:31

I have problems, because I have little use of my hands.

Can’t wash my hair.

Can’t change bed sheets and duvet cover

Can’t cut finger and toe nails.

MawB Mon 16-Mar-20 09:09:19

Hmm, I have been fairly philosophical about it up till now but the prospect of loneliness is beginning to get me down.
I truly thought I had turned a corner since losing Paw and while I still miss him more than I can describe, was finding a pleasant way through life with good friends, the freedom to go to London for a day, the occasional trip to the theatre or cinema, maybe a lunch, certainly a coffee.
The days on my own were the tearful days and now I fear a long succession of days like that.
Hmm. What can’t be cured must be endured, but it’s feeling a bit bleak.

Whitewavemark2 Mon 16-Mar-20 09:12:02

annie who does these things normally?

Anniebach Mon 16-Mar-20 09:13:50

Whitewave, my granddaughter come every two weeks, she lives 50 miles from me .

25Avalon Mon 16-Mar-20 09:30:08

I am more anxious than depressed but either make it difficult to concentrate on doing things, but it is doing things that will help. As Emerson said "every filled hour is a happy one" but how do you fill it? I am lucky as I have a large wilderness garden so plenty to do out there and get fresh air at the same time which is very therapeutic. If you don't have a garden maybe you could take a walk round the block when there aren't many about?
Otherwise how about writing up your memoirs - memories of when you were a child, or tales that your parents and grandparents told you that will be lost for ever unless you write them down.
How about taking up a new hobby? You can always order the equipment you need online and there are loads of instructional lessons that you can download from U-Tube.
Make use of the time that has been "given" to us. If you are religious how about reading the bible? Nothing that has ever happened is not in there somewhere, including plagues and wars and how people coped and survived.
Plenty of people spend years housebound with poor mobility and yet they are some of the most cheerful people. We can survive. Make the most of each day whilst still here.

Urmstongran Mon 16-Mar-20 09:39:06

Maw these are for you ? x

TerriBull Mon 16-Mar-20 09:44:46

I'm hoping and praying that self isolation for over 70s (my husband) I'm still a youthful mid 60ish, will at least mean they, the over 70s, will be allowed outside for walks in open spaces, this is something we do often now, having a couple of the Royal parks on our doorstep so if that's allowed that would be something to hang on to. My husband's gone off this morning for one of his last few games of golf for a while. Everybody hates the thought of being shut indoors and usually once we emerge from the winter around this time of the year, the unfolding months of better weather are something to look forward to. As with everyone else, holiday plans are cancelled, we would have been in Seville in a week or two, other travel plans on hold. I know we can't obsess about our individual circumstances, it's not great for anyone and hellish for some, but yes the thought of what is coming down the line is depressing. My husband told me on the upside, the house will be decorated and he'll be fluent in Spanish, and well whilst I wouldn't like to predict being anywhere near fluent in French myself by the end of the summer, I'll certainly throw more of my time at improving it.

Alexa Mon 16-Mar-20 09:57:40

Is inability to tolerate being alone a disability?

Doorstop Mon 16-Mar-20 09:58:29

Don’t cry, you’ll make me cry too. Wish we could all escape this nightmare. DH is 73 and is at work, the mortgage still has a year left on it and DS lives with us. Both work in retail. I am not going out but they will probably bring it in. I am quite isolated as have no other family. How I long for a walk in the country. It’s true you don’t know what you had until it’s gone! Sorry I am a new to Gransnet so hope you don’t mind me posting.

Alexa Mon 16-Mar-20 09:59:23

Dear Anniebach ! flowers