Do you ever feel this will never be over?

I had been saying to my husband about how well we were coping after 3 weeks of isolation. Going out for a walk is really just a dander as his legs get painful from vascular disease. my feet get sore from neuropathy but we do whatever we can for about 45 minutes. Each day we make a point of getting some chores done that are not day to day stuff. And each day I try to make sure that dinner is very different from the day before to keep it interesting. Yesterday was pasta and meatballs in a tomato and basil sauce. Today was chicken thighs in a chassis sauce with mashed potatoes and sprouts. Tomorrow it's just BLT in a ciabatta roll. The following will be sausage, eggs and chips. I have to think ahead as most everything is frozen. We haven't had any harsh words, we never do. And isolation hasn't changed that (so far ?). I do knitting, sudoko, crosswords and read a lot as well as tv. Ds and I always have an on line scramble game on the go. Dh misses his bowls but is a square eyed tv watcher and can always find an old Liverpool match to watch.
Family keep in touch and will do anything for us.
We are comfortable and coping well.....

I spoke too soon....... Why tonight does it feel overwhelming. I feel nervous and afraid. What if something happened to our son and family on the other side of the world? Or the other one at the other side of the UK. 2 others live locally.

I have ongoing medical conditions all of which are in the vulnerable category and together with my age I'm pretty sure would put me second choice for a ventilator. It's not the thought of being ill that troubles me so much as never seeing some of my dc or dgc again before I go.

No idea why tonight is so different.

I'm an insomniac and get about 3 hours sleep each night. Had an MRI a month ago and got a further referral from neurologist to respiratory physician. Not a lot of chance in seeing respiratory in the foreseeable future.
All this is going through my head tonight, it's 2.30am and I'll probably get to bed for a couple of hours sleep about 8am. That's the usual pattern.

I know full well that I am better off than many, all the poor people fighting for their lives as I write this. People who are alone in their home.

It really was only as I went to bed earlier that this came over me. Dh was kidding and said....only another 9 weeks or so to go. And I thought.... it will be a lot longer than that.

Sorry I'm rambling here.
No doubt the cloud will have left me tomorrow and I'll feel ashamed of my thoughts tonight.

I will go now and see if I can get an Asda delivery slot.
Tomorrow is a new day.

To anyone else up and about tonight I hope you find sleep soon.

Don't feel ashamed of your thoughts Coolgran. I've been a lifelong insomniac and am often creeping around when most of the rest of the country is asleep.

On the whole, I've been coping well with the "lockdown", although I did have a wobble last week. Strangely enough, I don't think it all bothers me as much as it does some other people because I don't have a lot to lose. The last ten years of my life have been a nightmare and I've already learnt to cope with the sense of loss which people are experiencing now.

The sheer madness of the past few weeks has caused each of us to question what we had viewed as the reality of our lives. We wash, isolate, cling to tv news even if it might not be accurate reporting, miss loved ones, worry if something as mundane as toilet paper will be available next week. Surely, depression is felt by each of us. There is no right or wrong way to react. Get rest, eat healthy, be gentle with your self-talk as well as others, make sure you laugh at least once a day. You are one day closer to a new reality that may be even better than the past.

Don't be ashamed of thoughts Coolgran Somebody suggested to me that we ae going through a sort of collective Flight, Fight, Freeze reaction. I found it an interesting idea.

If you can dig deep and find positives, good for you. If you have a bad day, so be it.

Those of us over 70 or vulnerable for other reasons may have to accept that we are in this for the long term. This virus is not going to go away, or that is unlikely at least. It might mutate into a less virulent form but hasn’t done so yet.

I’m watching with interest how China copes with the easing of their lockdown. I notice they are testing extensively and isolating those who carry the disease but are asymptomatic. This is obviously to stop a new wave of infection.

If lockdown is staggered, as I suspect it will be, then it will be the young and those who have already had the virus who will be ‘released’ first.

Then there is the big question - how long will immunity last? I fear we will not get back to a more normal life until a vaccine is available and that is a long way away.

I had a wobble last week too. Sat in our garden full of spring flowers in the sun with bird song all around and wept. Its the not knowing and helplessness that gets to me. Not being able to plan or look forward. We’re all in limbo. Suspended in time. The Virus is so ethereal. Invisible. It’s nothing anyone seems to be able to positively fight, sort out or solve.

I think I’m coming out of the Fight stage and accepting the Freeze position. Yesterday I felt quite Zen-ish.

I’m sorry if this sounds more depressing, but at the start of all this Chris Whitty was speaking about the measures that needed to be taken to reduce the UK death toll, and he was quoting 20,000 as a best case scenario.
I thought at the time, no way, but.....

I hope this morning you are feeling a bit better Starblaze?

I was thinking earlier that us oldies will be the last ones to come out of lockdown and in my case it would be with much trepidation. We have been stuck in for 4 weeks now and here in Spain the public aren’t even allowed out for a daily walk. It’s lockdown on steroids here.

I read this morning that an Oxford university scientist is 80% hopeful of an effective vaccine being available this autumn, which is something us oldies will be needing.

Some of those flouting the rules and making pathetic excuses and rationalisations seem to be staunch supporters of this government, which is a bit weird

I don’t think these reckless teenagers in the news who have been congregating with their mates in public spaces have any political allegiances growstuff!

It will end but it’ll be a long road. Hopefully the young can get back to a semblance of a normal life soon and then the rest of us can follow. My 20 year old daughter is home from uni and working in Tesco and very sad she can’t see her boyfriend. Who knows what will happen with regards to her studies. It’s much harder for her than it is for me.

A vaccine will be available and then we can really beat it. And other drugs to help treat the disease. So at the very least we have the certainty of that, even if it’s a long way off. And at the same time governments need to put huge pressure on places like China to ban the dreadful wet markets where this pandemic started (and others before it). Because if they don’t, this will happen again.

I think at a time like this, when we're facing something previously unknown and frightening, we go through the whole rollercoaster of emotions.
At first people were sending jokes and we did have some good laughs, then the songs, some better than others. Pictures of people's spring gardens were such a contrast to what is going on in the outside world.
The news brought the tears and fear for our loved ones and knowing that some were going to work in ICUs brought more anxiety and, I must admit, more tears.

That's probably not helping, I am usually a Pollyanna too, Luckygirl.

My cottage overlooks a small harbour. I am sitting at the window eating breakfast already three boats not locals have left loaded with picnic baskets. I am dreading today I fear an lnflux of people.it scares me to think of them contaminating our little village. Its only 8.30am and already iam panicking.

I'm feeling like you Coolgran. I mostly follow my Chinese friends online and get hope from their lives returning to normal. But the news everyday disproves my hope. Things here are so much worse. So many idiots still out and about. No testing. HOW will we ever get on top of it?

If I felt we were all fighting it together, I'd feel better. But a lot of the population aren't and they're increasing the infection and death count, and extending the lockdown.

Actually most of the population are adhering to the lockdown and all this talk about idiots being out and about really isn’t helpful. If lockdown isn’t eased soon in some way, people will start to rebel. Just listened to David Blunkett on R4 on the very subject and he’s calling for balance. We can’t let the lives of huge numbers of people be ruined by indefinite lockdown.

But Maggie more lives will be ruined, or ended completely, if we don't all adhere to the lockdown for as long as it takes to stop this virus from spreading further. Yes, businesses will fail, education will, be stalled and many people will suffer with mental ill health; but the alternative is too terrible to comprehend. We must all stay in. For as long as it takes.

GagaJo Thankyou. I hope everyone has their own piglet ready to be a shoulder. And we in turn can be piglet.

One problem is that lots of people think they are observing lockdown and don’t see their little ‘outings’ or visits as anything wrong.

I had a phone call from a friend yesterday who blithely told me how she goes every morning to pick up her paper, got the Easter eggs, popped them round (safe distancing in the garden) then went off to get the Easter leg of lamb and one or two bits, had a chat over the fence with the neighbour.......

She really believes she’s safe.

On Gransnet you only have to read the posts to see how many people are just doing those one or two little things that they didn’t really have to do.

There is no safe distance. Will anybody listen?

Lots of accounts of people out socialising. Local photos in addition to nationwide ones.

I genuinely believe they need to make these criminal offences. I also think we need troops on the streets to quell rebellion.

I really despair of the uk. We can't even adhere to the existing very lax rules to save lives. We already have a horrific death rate and our mortality rate is going to mirror the US if we don't do something drastic.

Totally agree Eglantine.

Transpires that 9 out of 10 of us ARE being sensible so that’s a good thought to hang onto, especially since the government have admitted they didn’t expect compliance to be so high!

Turns out the U.K. is behaving very sensibly, on the whole.
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It will never be over, my feelings are irrelevant. This event will change the world so it's no surprise old grannies are upset.

BUT,,,,,,until a vaccine is found and tested to be safe (about 12-18 months), all the lockdown is designed to do is to spread out the cases of people becoming very ill with his virus. Unless you all think that we should ALL stay in lockdown for the next 12-18 months, then we have to accept that between 70-80% of us will contract this disease sometime in the next few months.
Fortunately, for the over-whelming majority the symptoms will be nasty, but probably not as bad as a normal real dose of influenza and will not require any sort of hospitalisation, for a minority - they will require hospital and professional nursing care. For a significant, but small minority it will result in death.
It is obvious that there is no way the current lockdown can go on indefinitely. Food shortages are going to get worse as farmers are unable to harvest their crops, milk is already being thrown away, etc. Financial circumstances of many people and families is fast going from bad to dire.
The real tragedy is that the government was warned about all of this in 2016 - and the warnings seem to remarkably accurate, but decided they did not want to spend the extra money on purchasing ventilators, etc. etc.
The mis-leadership in this country in the first few weeks, is putting the people here amongst the worst (per capita) of death from this virus.
I also dread to see the eventual figures that come out of self-harm and suicide and serious mental breakdowns including post traumatic stress syndrome that will damage so many people for decades to come.

The Manchester police explained that those who indulged in street and house parties with bouncy castles and DJs and stuff , had "chaotic lifestyles". Police are aware of habitually chaotic people in their areas of control.

It's harder to explain the rich people with second homes, private aeroplanes and boats who break the rules. I put most law-breaking down to subcultures of people who really believe the rules don't apply to them.

Franbern, I hope and pray politicians will learn the lesson that short termism does not work, even in the shorter term.

I don`t think it will end totaly.
I think this will be an annual thing pretty much like the FLU.
I hope i am wrong though.

I think that for us oldies the world we know is changing forever. The youngsters will adapt much more easily. My son is looking forward to it - to more equality and social justice.
I have stayed at home for four weeks now apart from one trip to collect a prescription. My son’s wife is vulnerable and they have stayed home apart from food shopping.
I’m not afraid. It is what it is. If I get this virus and need hospitalisation the chances are I will die.
But at the moment I get up and embrace each new day