Angry

Lucca

*Nannan2*. Gagajo does not fly back and forth constantly.she had to return to a teaching job in Switzerland and really had. I choice. Her daughter chose to spend time with friend across the road.
Don’t think your comment about losing weight was particularly mind either.
Hope all goes well with the testing gagajo

So so many typos. No choice. Kind, not mind.

Thanks Lucca. I've developed a cough and headache, but obviously not from daughter's friend as she's tested negative. Could be psychodynamic. I'm neurotic at the best of times.

BibiSarah

Jo, where I live we have a lady who is constantly on social media telling people to stay home, don't go out etc etc etc yet she can see no wrong in the fact she drives her little girl round the block every night to get her to sleep.

People now refer to her as 'don't do as Emily does do as Emily says' and whilst I'm aware of her reasons for doing what she does she's kind of set herself up for the ridicule and accusations of hypocrisy from others.

It can't be much fun getting on a plane just now and I know some of my lot who are flight deck crew have their own thoughts on the matter but life really does have to go on because Covid isn't going away anytime soon.

“People” don’t know what they are talking about In that case!
So please come back and explain what the problem is with driving you own child in your own car.!?

Nannan2. Gagajo does not fly back and forth constantly.she had to return to a teaching job in Switzerland and really had. I choice. Her daughter chose to spend time with friend across the road.
Don’t think your comment about losing weight was particularly mind either.
Hope all goes well with the testing gagajo

Yes I was wondering that too Greengran, not sure how you would be a risk to others in a car with just your child

Bibisarah What on earth is wrong with someone driving a child in a car, whether to get them to sleep, or for any other reason? There is no more risk of infecting anyone that way than there is of picking up Covid while taking a walk well away from anyone else.

Some people really have very strange ideas of risky behaviour.

I can distance from daughter. But neither of us can distance from her son! Try staying away from a 2 year old.

Daughter was the one at the beginning of the virus to say that she thought she wouldn't get it too badly if she was unlucky enough to contract C19.And that her son / GS would be safe and that it was me that would be at risk. Of course, that was before younger people started being badly affected and children started getting Kawasaki symptoms.

Don't expect to rely on intergenerational social bubbles to protect you. Virtually everyone I know is part of overlapping bubbles, more like Venn diagrams.

She's an adult and can make her kwn decisions. Just the same as Gagaojo has made her own decisions

I work overseas as a teacher, nothing earth shattering. Low rate of virus there.

I wish I fit the way you imagine me! I have been on diets for virtually my whole adult life Natasha. Spare me any 'expert' advice you night have. I could give some background info but I don't owe anyone an explanation.

Daughter assured me they were social distancing, which I accepted although wasn't happy. Turned out once her friends family got ill, she admitted she hadn't been.

Anyway, their results are negative, so I've calmed down. Hopefully she'll be more sensible until I've gone. Friend and family are ill at the mo anyway.

Lovely helpful post. Helped me too xx

This is a good thread .... your daughter has been ‘unthinking’ rather than selfish..... my daughter has been into my garden once since February .... she will NOT come into house as she knows her brother comes in once every three weeks, as we need a bit of help sometimes( no hugging or kissing). She is right to be careful.... she has been hospitalised 34 times, with chronic/acute asthma, from 3 years old to 40, so far! Twice in intensive care ! She’s been shielding for the advised time ( Asthma Association advice not government).... and she’ll continue to be extra careful for as long as she thinks it’s necessary. She’s not stepped foot in a shop since February. I would rather I never hugged my daughter again than be the instigator of her being Ill. Your daughter needs telling to socially distance from you , if she’s not prepared to stop her reckless behaviour.

Gaga, I completely understand where you are coming from because I live with an idiot who cannot be trusted!

This made me laugh though I can imagine you don't find the reality of it much of a laughing matter.

Jo, where I live we have a lady who is constantly on social media telling people to stay home, don't go out etc etc etc yet she can see no wrong in the fact she drives her little girl round the block every night to get her to sleep.

People now refer to her as 'don't do as Emily does do as Emily says' and whilst I'm aware of her reasons for doing what she does she's kind of set herself up for the ridicule and accusations of hypocrisy from others.

It can't be much fun getting on a plane just now and I know some of my lot who are flight deck crew have their own thoughts on the matter but life really does have to go on because Covid isn't going away anytime soon.

I agree with quizqueen and Natasha76. I am interested to know what job obliges the OP to fly abroad during a pandemic.

QuizQueen has a valid point. We all have a responsibility to eradicate the effects of this virus and that responsibility can come in many forms. If you are overweight go on a diet, take more exercise to improve your lung capacity, cut down on alcohol consumption, give up smoking etc. Social distancing and good hygiene is only one part of the puzzle. I don't see the point of moaning about the behaviour of others if you're not doing as much as you can to make yourself stronger and healthy.

Hello GagaJo
Sorry to go off at a tangent with regard to your post, but I’m wondering whether I’ve been interpreting support bubbles incorrectly. I live alone and am in one with DC and grandchildren. They were attending school, in fact I collected them once. Have I misunderstood?

When I chat to friends on the telephone I listen to how careful they have been and how they are following the rules..... As a result of these conversations I have discovered that everybody has their own interpretation of the rules to suit themselves and their own circumstances.
Its sort of down to personal responsibility. You know how bad your own asthma and blood pressure is and if its that bad you wouldn't be flying anywhere so you have decided to take a calculated risk. The weight issue is again something that only you can decide to have a go at tackling. It seems a little unfair to heap these responsibilities onto your daughter when you are the one in charge of them. I assume she has none of these issues, so you are asking her to take the medicine you need to take because you don't want to.
I don't want to be unkind but maybe you could try to start tackling blood pressure and weight and this would help you feel more in control and less of a victim. It would be a little more constructive than being angry.
Good Luck and Take Care

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GagaJo - Personally, I think you are being unreasonable and expecting too much of your daughter. Before retiring I too flew regularly with my job but I wouldn't do it now, and I don't think there's any employer in the UK who would expect that. You can be as careful as you want but you have no control over the fact that the air conditioning in an aeroplane is a danger as it's not fresh air that's circulated. Only 50% of the air circulated is clean, and the rest is dirty so honestly, if there's one asymptomatic person on a flight o 250 people you have every chance of being infected. That's a risk that you are taking. Your daughter is still in a small bubble meeting a tiny fraction of the people you've met on four aeroplane journeys. If you are so worried about her social behaviour then you can of course, socially-isolate yourself from her, but she has every right to say the same about you.

I sort of agree with QuizQueen to but can also see that it might be very worrying for GagaJo. Presumably when you are away GagaJo, your daughter would be completely on her own if she didn't have her friend over the road. I can appreciate you are nervous but unless she quarantines from her friend for a fortnight before your return it is unlikely you will be 100% safe. Then, as you have been sat on a plane with other potential infected people you are equally risky.
I think you have to take reasonable precautions at home with your daughter but accept that you are both in a very difficult situation which isn't easy to overcome without both of you causing great upheaval in your lives.
I hope you are venting on here and not venting at your daughter calling her "selfish". It might seem that way to you but I expect she feels that you are being unreasonable too. It might be more helpful to have a gentle conversation about how you can both avoid having to worry about this in the future; you can't change what has past.

Yes Calli I imagine GagaJo tall thin with a salt & pepper pixie haircut!
I agree Polnan we don't like it if other posters don't agree with what we say!

I think I sort of agree with Quizqueen,, but as in another thread, I think we expect too much of our grown children

"ownership" comes to mind? not sure if daughter lives with you Gagajo,

not only our grown chidren appear to be selfish, but the whole human race? I just think too much at times, and try to love everyone,, not just family and friends... aren`t we ALL in this together? I could get angry at everyone... ho hum

hope this isn`t unhelpful or hurtful to anyone but isn`t this what discussion is about? sharing our views, and sometimes listening to someone else can help me sort out my feelings and thoughts...

It's odd, isn't it, how we imagine posters.
I imagined you to be tall and quite slim, or even thin, Gagajo, long hair up in one of those messy modern buns.

My mother used to say "Don't meet troubles halfway". Easier said than done of course.

I hope the tests are negative GagaJo. You’ll be anxious waiting for the result.