Who would you let into the house

My husband got involved with helping our neighbourhood alcohol abuser who fell, as he increasingly does. He had a back pack full of booze and despite our 78 year old neighbour and 2 mid teen girls trying to help him up, repeatedly fell over. My husband is 70 so a bit stronger than the neighbour, or those kind girls. They all felt an ambulance needed calling. The guy was unkempt, dirty and incoherent, plus couldn't stand. He became coherent at the notion of an ambulance, totally opposed and again tried to stagger off.
My husband put him in our car, drove to the house the man moved into about a year ago, his mother's house. My husband helped him indoors, spoke to his very elderly mum and sat the man on the sofa. He again refused an ambulance or a medic and gave my husband short shrift along the lines of clear off.

So sad and so worrying. This guy goes daily to buy booze, his mask round his neck. He's unkempt and unwell of course. We are in ur 70's, I'm immune suppressed. Our 78 year old neighbour cares for his wife who is mid cancer treatment. I don't know the kind teenage girls well enough to know if eg they were going to visit grannie up the road. This wasn't the first and won't be the last incident with this poor chap. Calling an ambulance when our area is tier 3 and he and his mum were relatively ok wouldn't have been a good move. Wait till next time.

All the rules we make are broken ??

petra, I’m assuming that remark is aimed at me, and that it appears to have offended you. Not intentional at all. I’m not a ‘ huggy’ person outside of family and close friends, regardless of Covid. Although I did say in the case of my neighbour, I most likely would have asked him in, but would have done an assessment of his distress first. For example, has someone close to him just died, or has he locked himself out? One definitely needs nurturing, the other, I would have contacted his son. I want to keep myself and all the people I love, as safe as possible. Maybe the answer is to ignore the door bell if you’re not expecting anyone.

The important part of rules and regulations is knowing when they can justifiably be broken, or at least flexed.

I would of done the same. I could never turn my back on someone who needed me.

I would have helped whilst trying to keep a safe distance, although it would be difficult not to hug your son. But, as in Teetime's case, I would have no hesitation in having close contact to help someone in a physical emergency.

Everyone would have done the same surely?

Lockdown or no lockdown you did the right thing.

We all know the reasons for reducing interaction between people but in circumstances such as you have described, nobody (I hope) would blame you.

DiscoDancer
but would have done an assessment of his distress first
If that wasn't so awful it would be laughable. ?

A questionnaire, perhaps?
On a scale of one to ten, how distressed are you?

I do know what discodancer means though, because my neighbours come up with all sorts of reasons to try and come in mine.

morethan of course you did the right thing. Your son needed you, how could you turn him away? Any human being in distress deserves care, you were able to offer that to your neighbour. We are permitted to provide care. We have done the same with a neighbour who lives alone and appeared in great distress one day. Please put it out of your mind and don’t worry. If either become unwell in the next few days you will need to follow protocol, otherwise it’s in the past. Could your son form a bubble with you? Then if he needed you in future you would have no need to fear doing the wrong thing.

Welfare visits are, and always have been, permitted. Just take as many precautions as you can; don’t hug without ppe, keep a distance and so on

The Good Samaritan didn't turn his back either ...

I would of let them in as I couldn't turn anyone away who needed help if they were in a terrible state. You can still socially distance in your home, we have to if we need tradesmen in don't we. To me you did the right thing.

I would have done the same Morethan. It would be instinctive.
I am sorry to hear your DS is still suffering from extreme distress.

I would have done the same and think most people would. I was out walking last week - tier 1 here, and I had no mask etc with me as only only a quick exercise trip. An elderly lady fell in front of me and hit her face and head on the pavement. Of course I helped her, to sit up and to try to stop the bleeding, as did a couple of others who lived and worked locally - none of us masked, and we waited with her until the ambulance came. I stripped off as I came in the door at home, had a shower and washed my hair and washed all of my clothes, but humanity has to come first. I do what I would want others to do for my family if we were in a similar situation.

It’s a difficult one. I really think it depends on which tier you are in and whether you, or anyone else in your household has an underlying condition which would put them at increased risk. I have several serious conditions and am on medication which affects my immune system, my elderly mum who lives with us has heart disease and vascular dementia and my partner has diabetes and atrial fibrillation. No one goes out, we do all shopping online, prescriptions are delivered, and no-one - and I do mean no-one, gets over my doorstep for any reason. Post/parcels are quarantined in the porch until safe to handle, and we have a bubble with my sister in law, who, if she does any essential errands for us, does not come into the house, but leaves things in the porch and we chat via an upstairs window. I’m normally the first to help if anyone is in distress and I would do my best whilst keeping my distance, but no, I would not let anyone in. I’m the first to recognise that we are very lucky - we have a garden, so can get fresh air easily and my heart goes out to anyone stuck inside, especially with kids. But our practice nurse, who worked in ITU during the first lockdown, put things into perspective for me when she advised that many people do not take the virus seriously, believing it ‘can’t happen to me’. She said that it’s so dangerous because it’s so easily transmitted, and until you have experienced the effects first hand, you have no idea of the havoc it can wreak on the human body. Trust no-one, keep your distance, wear a mask and wash your hands at every available opportunity. I know that there has been criticism of the governments’ handling of the pandemic, but it all honesty I’m not sure any political party would do any better. We have two choices, we can lift lockdown and rely on herd immunity whilst shielding the vulnerable, or we can adhere to lockdown rules until a vaccine is found and treatment options improve.

Thank you Miss A. All I was trying to say in my inept way, was that I wouldn’t rush straight in, unless it was painfully obvious. A choking child definitely, no hesitation, in fact any medical emergency. I was just trying to answer morethan’s question.

There is an exception for saving others from harm. I think that would apply in this case so don't worry.

My friends and family have never put me in this situation and I would not want sundry neighbours in the house. I am not uncaring but I would most likely be condemning DH to death as his health is fragile. Surely the first course of action, if you are distressed, is to pick up the phone and talk.

Harrigran in my case , my neighbour had dementia, his wife died very suddenly some months ago and he was distressed and shaking, no way could he have picked up the phone.
I’m relieved that he came to me (I’m next door) and didn’t wander around the village waiting for someone to answer their door.

You are allowed to help a person in need.

Aepgirl, yes, of course you can help - but what's stopping morethan2 from stepping outside?

Go out and help all you like, but the rules are there for a reason, to save lives. It's not a joke is it?

Franbern you did exactly the right thing.

Rules are rules but in an emergency they can be overridden. I think morethan2 most would do the same, unless like me someone in your house was vulnerable and had to be shielded, in which case you wouldn’t have let them in as. You would have a different cautious mind set.

25Avalon, since when was somebody being distressed/upset an emergency?

This is pathetic and depressing, just yet another post where somebody admits to breaking the rules - and is given encouragement and a pat on the back.

No wonder we're having a second wave and people are dying.

I talk to callers through my living room window as I have been shielding since March. This includes listening to a close friend who is going through hell as her hubby is in ongoing agony due to delayed hip op, and it has changed his character. I have had nice reassuring convos too, this way.

Open a window, I say.