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Coronavirus Christmas - oops I may have seriously upset SiL!

(156 Posts)
Daftbag1 Mon 28-Dec-20 17:27:27

Xmas eve DH's, DS turned up with Xmas gifts (and that's another story), she's single, late sixties but still working and because we live close, we are her bubble. Anyway, she was due on 25th for lunch so I was a little surprised to see her but tum te tum, she's a bit like that.

Anyway, I made her a cuppa and we sat down for a chat, during which she informed me that before coming to us, she was going to see her neighbours on either side, then one daughter for a mince pie, before going to the other daughter's for present exchanging. I thought she was planning to doorstep them all but as she spoke, it became clearer that she was actually going in to all these places.
I expressed my surprise and concern, as we are a Tier 4 area, and in addition we are meant to be her bubble. At this she laughed saying 'im a poor vulnerable old lady and entitled to my bubble's'! I explained that she could only have one bubble, and that she needed to make a choice. I also pointed out that she would not be able to get to all these places and be back for lunch. 'Oh but you will wait for me'!
I'm afraid at that point, I decided enough was enough, and politely told her that I was withdrawing her invitation for Xmas lunch and that I wasn't prepared to risk having her round and placing us at risk. I also suggested that she might want to take a minute to read the rules.
Sadly, I suspect that she is not alone in continuing to live without any concern about who she is placing at risk. She is an intelligent woman, and yet she behaves in this way. The worst of it all, is that I'm now feeling guilty!

Biscuitmuncher Fri 01-Jan-21 07:15:52

So you are ok with her going to work, but she can't have a brew with someone?

aggie Fri 01-Jan-21 07:19:41


So you are ok with her going to work, but she can't have a brew with someone?

There’s a difference in going to work , where , hopefully, protocols are in place , and flitting from house to house spreading the virus

Lucca Fri 01-Jan-21 10:14:41


So you are ok with her going to work, but she can't have a brew with someone?

It’s a brew with many someones.
You make it sound so innocent “have a brew”. It’s contact, indoors.
I despair.

Tangerine Fri 01-Jan-21 10:30:47

You've definitely done the right thing but I can understand how, human nature being what it is, you feel uncomfortable.

Confrontation is never easy, especially when you basically like someone.

Other people will side with you if she chooses to tell them to try and win them over. Try not to worry.

Elegran Fri 01-Jan-21 10:37:40

Not just "indoors" but indoors at many different houses, one after the other, passing on anything that may have been picked up from the previous houses. Then planning to move on to Daftbag's house for Christmas lunch and be treated as a "poor vulnerable old lady and entitled to my bubble's'" - where they would delay their meal if she was still exchanging germs elsewhere. Some people just don't get it.