Cannot visit grandkids if we fly

Maryelizabethrose - as others have said, you just have to follow parent's wishes. However, in the meantime, rather than trying to communicate by phone, which seems to be a problem, ask your son to send photos and short videos.

Having a son and family living in a different country, I found short video clips much better than trying to have a video call. I could watch the videos again and again, if I wanted, whereas with live calls, children were cranky or crying often!

Covid vaccinations protect those who are vaccinated. You can still catch it but will be less affected than if you were not vaccinated.
Vaccinated people can have Covid without symptoms, can carry and pass on the virus.
The air in a plane is recycled and you are in very close proximity to a lot of others, sharing the same air, and any virus' in that air.
The airport is enclosed and fresh air from outside isn't regularly blown through. Air con filters don't usually remove the virus, it's too small for their filters.
In a car, you are just sharing air with the other passengers. You open the windows, and doors regularly during the trip. This changes the air and disperses and virus in that air.
You stand more chance of catching Covid on a plane journey.

Our neighbours recently arrived back in Australia after 6 weeks in the UK........both contracted Covid on the flight home:-( even though masks were mandatory!

i don't think the child's mother is being unreasonable at all.
but whether she is or not is irrelevant, and i don't think it helps you to try to garner support for the view that she is unreasonable.
it doesn't matter. if everyone agreed she was being unreasonable, that would make no difference.
so it's not good for you to think in those terms.
it is the parents absolute decision.
their child is of the utmost importance to them.
nothing comes near that in importance, and certainly not how you react to their decisions.
i'm not being horrible, but if you don't shew proper respect for their role as parents at this time, it may adversely affect any future relationship.

I flew from Bali to Perth yesterday and although all passengers were asked to wear masks, many didn’t and I was surprised to see the majority of airport staff, immigration, border control, security staff etc etc without them too, bearing in mind the thousands of people they deal with each day!!! So yes, I would say flying is very high risk still!

I am in the UK. Last weekend I visited my youngest granddaughter (7 months) by train about 250 miles from me. In the rush to catch my train I forgot to take my covid test. Felt fine all throughout the weekend. Then on Tuesday and Wednesday I started to feel unwell and I tested positive for Covid. I became so anxious that I had put the baby and family at risk. I have always been so careful to protect my family and others. They are fine. However I will never make that mistake again of not testing before I visit. It’s possible I could have caught Covid on my return as it was jam packed due to previous cancellation.

The parents are being very reasonable - covid.

Fly, stay in a hotel, see lovely California for a few days, test negative and meet the baby. You have that choice, I presume.

I have been on 4 flights and didn’t catch it. Caught it at home from my husband who got it from his colleagues. Good advice to holiday in San Francisco until negative if you can afford it.

You can go... By car!

Having just flown to and from Canada on a service that still requires a mask to be worn whilst on onboard all the while, it seems responsible airlines also consider it a risk still. So perhaps your dil is wise.