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Education

Wondering whether to move grandson from his school.

(60 Posts)
Grandma70s Sat 25-Sep-21 12:31:34

My son and DIL are considering changing my grandson’s school. He has just started Year 8 at a fairly high profile London day school, where he has been a pupil since he was 7. He was happy enough in the juniors, but is finding the senior school hard. It’s selective, and it’s very high achieving. He is by no means among the brightest, and is apt not to try at things he is not really interested in, like maths. He likes sport, but is not particularly good at it.

Of course his Year 7 was really messed about by Covid, so in a way this year is his first proper year as a senior. Other children seem to be managing much better, though. His parents think he might be better at a comprehensive where competition and achievement is less important, but he’s not fond of change, and changing schools is a major event. (For me it would have been traumatic.) They are trying so hard to do the right thing, but it is a major step that could go horribly wrong. I haven’t heard what the boy himself thinks.

Does anyone have experience of this situation?

Grandma70s Sun 26-Sep-21 16:38:02

It’s a selective fee-paying school. It has an entrance exam that is generally known as the 11 plus. The school is vastly oversubscribed and the exam seems to be quite tough, but as I said earlier he was in the junior school and that seems to smooth the path.

I don’t think his parents are especially concerned, except about his happiness, but the children themselves are very aware of who’s top and who isn’t. It’s quite important in the school, I think. There were exams at the end of Year 7 and everyone knew who’d done well in those. My grandson did well in history, but not in anything else. He didn’t put any effort into revising - not that I think he should have done. I don’t think they need serious exams at his age.

As far as I know they haven’t discussed the situation with him yet, but they certainly would if change became a serious option.

Josianne Sun 26-Sep-21 17:24:40

I'm sure people know, but it's worth a reminder that a full term's notice in writing is required at an independent school.
Any child wishing to leave now would effectively have to pay school fees up until the summer term.

trisher Sun 26-Sep-21 18:02:53

Grandma70 it is a common occurence in education for children who have had a lot of pressure put on them in Year 6, to pass exams, to slack off in year 7. Some don't but some do and then of course there was covid and schools closing. He's had a bad start, leave him in year 8 and let him settle down.I'm sure if the school is really worried about him they will contact the parents. They won't want anyone pulling their exam results down.

annodomini Sun 26-Sep-21 18:44:24

In the schools (comps) attended by my GC, GCSE options are settled in Y8. Your GS might be happier when he has chosen the subjects he likes and drops some that he can't cope with. My youngest DGS, now 13, isn't very academic and not in the least mathematical, but he is pleased to have been able to opt for Drama and History, subjects he enjoys.

Shelflife Sun 10-Oct-21 19:42:59

This is not about comprehensive verses private education. The question is - is the child unhappy in school ? If so a move may well be the answer . If he is happy in school but not achieving as much as parents expect then he need love and understanding - not a move to another school where his progress may not improve. If your grandson is settled in school I would leave him where he is . If a move is deemed necessary then it does not matter whether the school is comprehensive or private! What does matter is that it is the correct school for him. Although it is worth considering that a move from private school to state school may be a rough ride.

Fennel Mon 11-Oct-21 19:01:38

35 years ago this kind of problem was common in my job. But I'm amazed how things have changed.
I wonder if things have changed with the relative importance of friends and social life in those years 7 and 8. If this boy is lonely and miserable he will probably not reach his academic potential in a different school.
Best advice ask the boy himself, and his teachers. Then wait until much later in the school year.

welbeck Mon 11-Oct-21 23:37:18

what about moving him to another kind of private school.
don't know what part of London he is in, but what about something more progressive, eg the king alfred school.
www.kingalfred.org.uk/about-us/

growstuff Mon 11-Oct-21 23:49:53

I wonder what the source of the stress is. Could it be the parents?

I work as a private tutor and the majority of my pupils underachieve because they lack confidence not ability. If the parents can afford it and can find a good tutor. it's something worth considering. The parents should talk to the boy and try to find out what's causing the biggest problem(s).

Dinahmo Mon 11-Oct-21 23:57:38

Grandma70 Why haven't they talked to the school. From what you've said it seems as thought there's a lot of supposition going on, especially on your part.