Time to draw a line?

Good for you Sallywally, what right does your ED's husband have to tell you you can't send your GS's birthday cards. What matters to you is you send them.

Sallywally, what a charmer your sil is. I would do as you’d do and ignore him. As you say everything passes.

So very sorry to hear this, Hels, and I have to admire your commitment over the long term, despite the fact that your efforts have not been appreciated. Perhaps it's now time to draw a line under it, painful as that is, and move on to pastures new. Excusing yourself from the pressure of a continued fruitless and emotionally draining exercise will become a positive, and it will get easier.

Dear Hels ,
How cruel your dd and sil are.
I can’t imagine what heinous crimes they feel you are guilty of to punish you in such a way. Clearly not bad enough to warrant being treated like an anonymous babysitter for the odd hour or two and the butt of a cruel joke to put your loving gift in a “pass the parcel” party game.
Shame on them!
I don’t think other people would think much of them either and you know what children are like, if your gd knew the gift was meant for her I’m sure it wouldn’t make her happy.
I feel sad for you and had to tell you I think you are worth more than this.

I have a pregnant dil who is mean and nasty and only today has caused trouble between me and my son. She doesn’t want me around she never has and when she has this baby, even though it’s my son’s I will never put myself through pain like you have.
It sounds like your daughter has her husband’s backing and that’s a difficult one to break down barriers.
Take care of yourself. Xx

What is the matter with people?? When did people become so mean and spiteful to their parents? Ive been estranged from my son for over 15 years Ive stopped counting. For my own sake I dont even go there now. Their plan is to break you to have you on your knees for not being a perfect parent dont let them. Carry on regardless. Let them get on with it. One cannot fix what ails them. One day they will question their behaviour when its too late. I believe in karma they will at some point get a taste of their own treatment. Take care of yourself.

VioletSky

I think, for your own sake, it is time to stop.

I would advise some grief counselling while things are so painful... unless you would consider offering your daughter joint counselling to see if you can move past this together

I agree with this. Buying gifts without any attempt at reconciliation is pointless

I am always very sad to hear of estrangements within families and some without reason. I know you are being given good advice here from grans with a very similar experience.

I agree (easily said than done though) have a time to weep then try to move on. You still have your life to live and you have done all you can. Take the advice given wisely open an account for your GC and leave details in your will. I wish you well look after yourself 💐

That was an old thread. I wonder how Hels is doing now