New to Gransnet - estranged from our son

Any comment placing blame on the wife.

Any comment placing blame on the wife good one

I’m glad you can find humour in the sad situation of a mother and son’s relationship breakdown. I personally cannot. Hopefully you find it tickling because you can show us all the countless examples of women reconciling with their sons while hating and blaming their wives for everything. Maybe there are success stories of women who cling to the their displaced/projected anger at the wives and still remain tight with their sons, and I too can join you in amusement!

It was your response that amused me nofrowns.

Maybe sometimes people are content until they meet a new family or make a family and decide things should be different. The situation is normal until it doesn't feel normal anymore. Then the parents keep on with their way of doing things but the child isn't happy any more and doesn't look back fondly.
Maybe that is what has happened here? Some children happy with their normal and one not? Try and talk to your son, maybe it is ok to try and be the parent he needs now if he feels that the parent he had younger wasn't what he needed?

There is nothing wrong with trying a different “normal” whatever that is, as I guess it’s subjective.

But, you don’t have to throw the babies out with the bathwater. Different people have different ways, and that’s how life is, in many spheres.

It doesn’t always need a drama. 🤷‍♀️

I agree DL, 'normal' is subjective and as you say you don't have to throw the babies out with the bathwater.

Well, not in my world. Everyone has different views on things. Which is fine. Which is normal Not everything needs analysis or dramas.

Sometimes, we just celebrates our differences. 🤷‍♀️

For me, it's the constant analysis and/or drama that causes the problems that become dramas and then require analysing DL.

Well, I’ve never got all this Drama Llama stuff. People in life, including relatives, can all be very different.

I’m sure a lot of us remember the eccentric older person who could always be relied upon to speak his/her mind, after a couple of sherrries.🙄

Weddings and funerals used to be great fun lol 😉

And we remember them with fondness don't we DL, well I do.

Smileless2012

And we remember them with fondness don't we DL, well I do.

Yes, we all used to sigh and try to restrict the sherry lol 😂

I gathered from the original post it was since the son had been with his wife that he had changed. There are nice Dil I have one, but a lot of men are inclined to go wife sway instead if making a stand. Let's assume that the don has since meeting his partner for reasons unknown, turned against hs mother for whatever reason, nothing to do with Dil. The advice is the same, doubt waste your life wishing for what was once, value those you have and leave him to it. Bye the way, if I never got to see my mil or she didn't see the grandchildren, I woukd be having a conversation with my husband, but I had a good relationship with my in laws. Some people actually love mil and mil their Dil.