People who fear Christmas

That too will pass Babs .

I really feel for them. I have a similar situation. 4 grandchildren, probably 5 now as a neighbour found a photo of my youngest, heavily pregnant, on Facebook. I found our about my other grandchildren via Facebook too, before my children realised and blocked me and all my friends. I put cards and small gifts for each of the grandchildren in a box on Birthdays, Christmas, Easter etc. to be given to them, either when I am pushing up daisies, or if they ever find out about me and come to find me. Christmas passes by in anxious days,

Sarahr

I really feel for them. I have a similar situation. 4 grandchildren, probably 5 now as a neighbour found a photo of my youngest, heavily pregnant, on Facebook. I found our about my other grandchildren via Facebook too, before my children realised and blocked me and all my friends. I put cards and small gifts for each of the grandchildren in a box on Birthdays, Christmas, Easter etc. to be given to them, either when I am pushing up daisies, or if they ever find out about me and come to find me. Christmas passes by in anxious days,

This year, after nearly 11 years, was the first time we didn't send birthday presents to our GCs and we won't send Xmas presents either. In all these years there has not been a word. The last time we saw them they were little children now they are teenagers and probably don't remember us at all.
Instead we buy a small cake and light a candle on it on their birthday, remembering them in our own way. Will light a candle for them at Xmas as well.
I really feel for you
I know how hollowed out this sadness makes us feel sometimes, but you are not alone.
All the best.
xx

As a meagre consolation to all who have written here: karma is a bitch. Sometimes late but always there eventually

Christmas can really bring out the dark side of family life which is one of the reasons I never celebrate it.

Have to say I’m dreading it too. I hate being away from home at Christmas but haven’t been able to enjoy it at home for at least 10 years .
As mum and dad got older I started doing Christmas at their house and now that mum has died and dad has moved to a retirement flat I’m still doing it. And I hate it. Dad can’t do my house as he can’t climb stairs
I’m maybe just a horrible person, but I’m not getting any younger ; my adult children all have lovely partners and I just want a totally relaxed Christmas with them all in my house.
I’m already waking through the night worrying about it.

Babs, , I found out my presents had never been passed on.
I do wonder if these controlling women ever think it might happen to them. It's very cruel to keep children form a loving father and his family. My heart goes out to anyone in that sad situation but they must for their own sanity not let it break them as there is little you can do against a woman determined to move house, area, tell lies anything to hurt their ex.

SueEH

Have to say I’m dreading it too. I hate being away from home at Christmas but haven’t been able to enjoy it at home for at least 10 years .
As mum and dad got older I started doing Christmas at their house and now that mum has died and dad has moved to a retirement flat I’m still doing it. And I hate it. Dad can’t do my house as he can’t climb stairs
I’m maybe just a horrible person, but I’m not getting any younger ; my adult children all have lovely partners and I just want a totally relaxed Christmas with them all in my house.
I’m already waking through the night worrying about it.

Oh Sue, Don't put yourself through the worry. Can you visit your Dad either side of Christmas? And have your Christmas?