Gransnet forums

Estrangement

Not seeing grandkids

(132 Posts)
DubAngel Wed 18-Jun-25 20:53:52

I just feel completely cut off.
I live 20 minutes away from my grand children and I'm feeling pushed out.

We make plans to meet up and 9 5imes out of 10 it's cancelled.
We've had no falling out.

I understand kids,school,work is a stressful time especially with small kids.

I'm just wondering how to being it up with my son,I don't want to souncritical.
I don't want a row but I feel I need to say something.
Any advice would brilliant.

Allsorts Tue 15-Jul-25 03:55:43

Leo58, please don't respond to such comments. Made to derail and upset people, they appear out of the blue usually one person under several names supposedly supporting each other, mad I know, just ignore, would you want to mix with anyone who speaks to others that way ?

Finewine45si Thu 07-Aug-25 03:35:10

Hi new to site. Looking forward to having convod

Kamiso Thu 07-Aug-25 05:47:39

Starfire57

Llortl38562

DubAngel

I wrote the post last night because I was upset.

1.i don't expect to see them every Sunday for lunch
2.nor would I go down everyday.
3.i know they are busy.
4.i just want to be included sometime.
5.
I'm in Ireland and I wouldn't bring them to court.
6.i brought my own dm in to show that I understand boundaries.
7.im allowed to feel annoyed and have my feelings hurt over being cancelled.
8.
I've decided to leave it and let them contact me.

I'm glad you're doing the right thing.

Now instead of focusing on how upset you are (I don't know the full story behind the cancellation, but if they are completely in the wrong than I'm sure a respectful, adult-to-adult conversation will suffice).

Focus on becoming more likeable instead. Since you can't make him like you or spend time with you. He's not a little kid under your total control anymore. He's actually so grown that he has a child of his own, so his parent's feelings shouldn't really be a priority for him right now.

Once again, glad you aren't making it his problem.

Though I have the fear that your comment:

"I've decided to leave it and let them contact me."

Means you're going to go the petty route and give them the silent treatment.

If that is the case, than your silence will be a true gift to them, not a curse.

So, you tell her she's doing the right thing, but it's petty?? Do you even hear yourself?

Starfire: The person causing the added distress is a regular nuisance whose user name reads Troll backwards. Given the high divorce rate in the US it’s surprising these problems never occur.

Starfire57 Sun 10-Aug-25 04:50:51

Thank you, Kamiso

Whiff Sun 10-Aug-25 15:53:46

Other ones to look out for are nilbog - goblin spelt backwards and emong- gnome backwards.

Smileless2012 Sun 10-Aug-25 17:48:30

They all seem to be long gone thank goodness Whiff smile.