Patronising comments about mature love

My greatgrandfather remarried in his eighties. He had got it into his head that his children could claim that he wasn't compos mentis as he was over 80, so he gave his age as about 10 years younger than reality. This amused the said children, as it would have made him 13 when his eldest son was born.

Been with hubby 13 yrs,married for 6,we hold hands when we go out,why not and for both of us it's third time lucky

There was a verse in a song by Lonnie Donegan Im sure many remember it

My old man's a dustman he's got an 'eart of gold
He got married recently tho he's 86 yrs old
We said 'ere hang on dad you're gettin past your prime
Well when you get to my age son it 'elps to pass the time.

Baggs

ginny

I can’t actually see what you are objecting to PetiFromage. They seem perfectly nice comments to me.
I very pleased for you.

Agreed.

The OP is either too sensitive or looks for offence where non was meant.

Sorry I can't see anything wrong with the comments at all. It's no wonder so many people have stopped being friendly and interacting with others.

DH and I often hold hands when we are out and we're almost 70. No one has ever commented. If anyone ever did say 'I hope I'm still so in love.....' I would probably just smile and say 'Well you've got to work at it... it doesn't just happen'.

Just grab what you've found in both hands and enjoy it.

petra

Baggs

ginny

I can’t actually see what you are objecting to PetiFromage. They seem perfectly nice comments to me.
I very pleased for you.

Agreed.

The OP is either too sensitive or looks for offence where non was meant.

To be fair I was wondering if there is a little bit of (unwarranted) guilt after having a lovely marriage and now finding someone else.

Yes, maybe a bit of guilt, but thank you for your kind and encouraging comments, and I do feel lucky to have found love again later in life.

How lovely to hear.

Oreo

It isn’t that you have found love again OP it’s the fact you’re holding hands, which many couples still do even at Golden Wedding age.
We sometimes hold hands but have never had any comments, but in any case I would have just laughed if we had done.
Am now tempted to have a public full on snog just to see if anyone reacts😄

Made my day that one. I had a very big smile on my face. Go on I dare you and take a video! {smile}

ginny

I can’t actually see what you are objecting to PetiFromage. They seem perfectly nice comments to me.
I very pleased for you.

I thought the same too.

I have a widowed sister in her 60's who found love again and is now remarried. They are very affectionate in public but not to the point of being obnoxious. They have had strangers tell them that they are such a cute couple. Recently, strangers noticed their sweet affection in a restaurant and paid for their meal. There will be people who are happy for you so try to ignore the rest.

Camry1952

I have a widowed sister in her 60's who found love again and is now remarried. They are very affectionate in public but not to the point of being obnoxious. They have had strangers tell them that they are such a cute couple. Recently, strangers noticed their sweet affection in a restaurant and paid for their meal. There will be people who are happy for you so try to ignore the rest.

Who’s not happy for the OP? The comments she mentions are teasing/ affectionate and hopefully having read many of the posts, she’s just counting her blessings.

Agreed. Why would anyone take offence?

Ignore the young folk comments as they gave no idea how life develops and as for older people, not worth even commenting on. You have found happiness so enjoy.

Speaking as a 67 woman in love my beloved 72 year old husband, I think you are being oversensitive. It’s not patronising at all. What you describe is young adults struggling to find their ‘one’ saying that seeing you reminds them that there is plenty of time i.e ‘there is hope for me yet’. Stop looking for negatives!

Oreo

It isn’t that you have found love again OP it’s the fact you’re holding hands, which many couples still do even at Golden Wedding age.
We sometimes hold hands but have never had any comments, but in any case I would have just laughed if we had done.
Am now tempted to have a public full on snog just to see if anyone reacts😄

No tongues though 😂

Spoilsport!

My gran was widowed with young children. She married again in her 40s and lost him 20 years later.

She married George aged 75, the same year as me. They adored each other. So much so that she had a stroke aged 80 and ended up in a geriatric ward. George aged 91, took a bus every day for nearly 5 years to sit with her, and when she died, he followed her 2 days later.

Ahh, how lovely and sad, all at the same time.

My great aunt married at 82, to a well kept, upright, intelligent man, and within around a year they hated each other, and were considering divorce.

I love Hilary Boyd too marg 75.

Lucky are those who can find true love, at whatever age.
My friend once told me, ‘H, you are lucky in most things , but you are definitely not lucky in love ‘ - how right ! And btw, I was married once and divorced. It’s not that I loved and lost many times 😂

Well, you never know, CrazyH

Some old bloke might give you the glad eye, and you'll fall - hook, line, and sinker.

Thanks MissA - can’t wait 😂

I think people are happy to see “older love”. It gives them hope that one day they might find the love of their life. I didn’t get married (fall deeply in love) until I was 59. My friends, family and strangers were delighted for us / me. I have never felt patronised. The image is that older people do not experience intense love. So I would say revel in it and the admiration of others xxx