LIMERICKS 4

Suzy was late for her date last night
Because her pink shoes were much too tight
She hobbled and limped
She grimaced and gimped

Suzy was late for her date last night
Because her pink shoes were much too tight
She hobbled and limped
She grimaced and gimped
Every step only increased her plight.

She should wear size seven or eight

She should wear size seven or eight
That would surely improve Suzy’s gait

She should wear size seven or eight
That would surely improve Suzy’s gait
Squeeze tight her wee toes

She should wear size seven or eight
That would surely improve Suzy’s gait
Squeeze tight her wee toes
Just increased her woes

She should wear size seven or eight
That would surely improve Suzy’s gait
Squeeze tight her wee toes
Just increased her woes
And caused her to always arrive late.

There was a young lady from Bristol

There was a young lady from Bristol
Who was warned not to carry a pistol

There was a young lady from Bristol
Who was warned not to carry a pistol
That advice she ignored

There was a young lady from Bristol
Who was warned not to carry a pistol
That advice she ignored
She began to get bored

There was a young lady from Bristol
Who was warned not to carry a pistol
That advice she ignored
She began to get bored
So went home to polish her crystal.

When it was all shiny and bright

When it was all shiny and bright
She decided, 'I'll go out tonight'.

When it was all shiny and bright
She decided, 'I'll go out tonight'.
She dressed all in black

When it was all shiny and bright
She decided, 'I'll go out tonight'.
She dressed all in black
Looking a bit like a sack

When it was all shiny and bright
She decided, 'I'll go out tonight'.
She dressed all in black
Looking a bit like a sack
But in the dark she passed for all right.

The club bouncers said, 'Please go away'

The club bouncers said, 'Please go away'
We don’t need your sort here today

The club bouncers said, 'Please go away'
We don’t need your sort here today
This they will regret

The club bouncers said, 'Please go away'
We don’t need your sort here today
This they will regret
As she will never forget

The club bouncers said, 'Please go away'
We don’t need your sort here today
This they will regret
As she will never forget

Sorry!
She'll get her own back some day!

Henetha thanks for getting us back to the original format, it's much more fun

So what do you think she did then?

So what do you think she did then?
She coupled up with a villain called Ken

So what do you think she did then?
She coupled up with a villain called Ken
And now here's the rub

So what do you think she did then?
She coupled up with a villain called Ken
And now here's the rub
They took over the club

So what do you think she did then?
She coupled up with a villain called Ken
And now here's the rub
They took over the club
And now there's two out of work men!

And that's not the end of the story

And that's not the end of the story
Both her and Ken ended up poorly

And that's not the end of the story
Both her and Ken ended up poorly
Alas,not in wedded bliss