Limericks 7

It was those six martinis that did it
Today I'm definitely not with it
I slur like a good'un
But I had such good fun
Oh No! Off to the toilet, I must visit.

Never again, I thought to myself

Never again, I thought to myself
Those vodkas can stay on the shelf

Never again, I thought to myself,
Those vodkas can stay on the shelf
Next time I'll try gin....

Never again, I thought to myself,
Those vodkas can stay on the shelf
Next time I'll try gin....
Saying this with a grin

Never again, I thought to myself,
Those vodkas can stay on the shelf
Next time i'll try gin
Saying this with a grin
Sure to be better for my health

If I'd stayed home, and not gone out,

Never again, I thought to myself,
Those vodkas can stay on the shelf
Next time I'll try gin....
Saying this with a grin
How long it will last, only time will tell.

There's a nasty old smell in the air

If I'd stayed home, and not gone out,
I'd have been further on with the grout

If I`d stayed home and not gone out,
I`d have been further on with the grout
But instead my new tiles

If I`d stayed home and not gone out,
I`d have been further on with the grout
But instead my new tiles
Still stand there in piles

ngran99

If I`d stayed home and not gone out,
I`d have been further on with the grout
But instead my new tiles
Still stand there in piles
And the bathroom resembles a dug-out

I wish I had married a plumb

Plumber?

I wish I had married a plumber
But I didn`t, oh what a bummer,

I wish I had married a plumber
But I didn`t, oh what a bummer,
The pipes are all leaking

I wish I had married a plumber
But I didn`t, oh what a bummer,
The pipes are all leaking
And I can't stop weeping

I wish I had married a plumber
But I didn't, oh what a bummer,
The pipes are all leaking
And I can't stop weeping
This is a terrible summer!

I wish I had stayed at home

Instead of deciding to roam

Sorry!

I wish I had stayed at home Instead of deciding to roam

Sorry again? I think I'll give up!!

I wish I had stayed at home
Instead of deciding to roam
I'd sit in my chair

Persevere Patreesh you'll get the hang of it

I wish I had stayed at home
Instead of deciding to roam
It bucketed down

I wish I had stayed at home
Instead of deciding to roam
I'd sit in my chair
And shave off my hair

I wish I had stayed at home
Instead of deciding to roam
I'd sit in my chair
And shave off my hair
Except that I've run out of foam

So I'll have to venture to Asda

So I'll have to venture to Asda
I'll go in my brand new Mazda

So I'll have to venture to Asda
I'll go in my brand new Mazda
It's the chauffeur's day off