Limericks 9

You could see he just wanted to boast

It must be near Halloween

Did you ever meet up with a ghost?
I have, but I`m embarrassed to post
He floated upstairs,
Carrying two chairs
You could see he just wanted to boast

It must be near Halloween

It must be near Halloween
The shops are full of witches, not queens

It must be near Halloween
The shops are full of witches, not queens
Skeletons galore

It must be near Halloween
The shops are full of witches, not queens
Skeletons galore
Spider's webs in store

It must be near Halloween
The shops are full of witches, not queens
Skeletons galore
Spider`s webs in store
It all helps to set the scene

I really don`t like trick or treat night

I really dont like trick or treat night
I hide upstairs, totally out of sight

I really dont like trick or treat night
I hide upstairs, totally out of sight
My kids think it's exciting

I really dont like trick or treat night
I hide upstairs, totally out of sight
My kids think it's exciting
My purse is empty, surprising?

I really dont like trick or treat night
I hide upstairs, totally out of sight
My kids think it's exciting
My purse is empty, surprising?
But beware that vampire bite??

There was an old geezer from Crewe

There was an old geezer from Crewe
Who got some dog muck on his shoe,

There was an old geezer from Crewe
Who got some dog muck on his shoe,
T'was a terrible pong

There was an old geezer from Crewe
Who got some dog muck on his shoe,
T'was a terrible pong
Though it didn’t last long

There was an old geezer from Crewe
Who got some dog muck on his shoe,
T'was a terrible pong
Though it didn’t last long
That's the one saving grace about poo.

Though talking about it is rude

Though talking about it is rude
I confess I sit here in the nude

Though talking about it is rude
I confess I sit here in the nude
The cool evening breeze

Though talking about it is rude
I confess I sit here in the nude
The cool evening breeze
Gently wafts by my knees

Though talking about it is rude
I confess I sit here in the nude
The cool evening breeze
Gently wafts by my knees,
Hey, who's that peeping? It's next door's dude.

I threw a bucket of water over him

I threw a bucket of water over him
But missed and it drenched his brother Jim

I threw a bucket of water over him
But missed and it drenched his brother Jim
The water was icy cold

I threw a bucket of water over him
But missed and it drenched his brother Jim
The water was icy cold
Well, he's been told

I threw a bucket of water over him
But missed and it drenched his brother Jim
The water was icy cold
Well, he`s been told
But he appears to be rather dim.

His attention is liable to wander

His attention is liable to wander
His mind is out somewhere yonder

His attention is liable to wander
His mind is out somewhere yonder
He'd better concentrate

His attention is liable to wander
His mind is out somewhere yonder
He'd better concentrate
And deliberate